TB

[Elad]

You are in a good place. Continue really exploring: What is seemingly the "I" making things happen ? How is it imagined in real time ?

AND as opposed to this imagined experience that feels real because habitually believed...


What is actually there in direct experience ? Where do thoughts and actions come from in real time direct experience ?


Do this exercise also:


Mind labelling experience


Here is an exercise which examines the way in which the mind labels experience - it takes
about 20 minutes and you will need a pen a paper.
This exercise is broken into 10 minute lots. For each 10 minute period pay attention to any
bodily sensation ie is there any tightening, or any relaxing?

For the first ten minutes write down what you are experiencing right now using the word “I”.
For example: I am sitting on a chair, I am hearing a clock ticking, I am looking at a
computer screen, I am feeling hungry. Get right to the point, no past or future fantasy, just
a plain description of your experience right here and now.

Then for the next ten minutes continue writing down what you are experiencing but this
time without using the word “I”. Just describe the experience as it is happening using
verbs. For example: sitting on a chair, typing, breathing, blinking, hearing the clock. (Again,
watch what is happening in the body.)

At the end of the twenty minutes compare the two ways in which the experience was
labelled and answer the following four questions:

1. Is one truer than the other, and If so, which one?

2. What is here without labels?

3. Does the labeling activity change what is there in direct experience and being described?

4. Did you notice any differences in the body?

[ThomasBurdic]

Yes it’s quite clear that this “Me” sense controlling the body,
Is associated with this sense of ‘here-ness’: persistent sensations in the chest/torso. and a sense of agency that latches itself onto every action/thought etc.
and that constantly there’s this “affirming” of this sense of me/here-ness and it creates some sensations in the torso area each time, along with subtle thoughts appearing very quickly.
Because thoughts arise often affirming this sense/belief either implicitly or explicitly


In direct experience, it’s still unclear. I can see that a lot of actions coming from interactions between subtle impulses, thoughts, intentions that arise quite quickly and subtly. So it isn’t clear that there’s “me” who’s in control of that. I will keep doing this exploration.

As I’ve done the ‘I do’ vs ‘doing’ exercise,
I’ve noticed that, for example if I think “breathing/seeing” rather than “I breathe, I see” etc.. there is some subtle feelings that arise in the body. Sort of pleasant feeling. Which is interesting.

And that on the other hand when the “I do/I think/I sit” thought happens, there is a subtle feeling of ‘here-ness’ which again affirms that “me” sense in the body sensations.
Affirming that sense of “consciousness” of “Me” as the observer and agent

[Elad]

Good!

Now this is important: Here/there, me/you these are useful concepts for normal life, we could not function without them. If you lost the sense of me/you here/there you would not be functional. This is not about making this sense go away. It is about seeing clearly that neither "here" nor "me" refers to an objective self existing real thing. Rather they are only concepts that make sense in particular contexts of thinking and communication. You see this by seeing that it all happens by itself, including the sense of me/you here/there etc. Look to see that in direct experience beyond doubt. Me and here are only concepts that refer to nothing permanent and independent and only make sense in contexts of communication.


The peace you felt describing without me is a pointer..... The body reacts with peace when simplicity and direct experience is acknowledged and accepted.

Here are some exercises for you:

1. Can you see a self making you leave the bed?

Where does the "decision", the "command" to get up come from? What makes the body
get up? Does a ‘you’ or a thought command the body?
It's always interesting to see the difference between thought content and what really
happens. “Can you see a self making the body leave the bed?”

2. 'On a count of 5, raise either your left or right arm, or not.' Dead simple. Is there self deciding?

3. Can you choose to fall asleep? Can you find the moment / point / spot or realm where
you choose to fall asleep?

4. Can you choose the very content of the next thought? Can you choose willingly the next
thought that will arise?

5. Can you choose the very quality (tightness, openness, vibration, hardness, contraction
etc) of the physical sensation, that will arise next?

6. Can you choose the next emotion, mind state, attitude that will arise? Sit and look at
what is happening. Can you find any choice - point where you willingly chose any emotion
that appeared in response to a stimulus?

7. Think of a number between 1 and 20. Try to notice the exact point when the choice is
made. Did you know what number would be chosen before it appeared?

8. Go to another room, pick a random object and bring it back to the computer. What created the decision to bring that object? A self deciding anywhere?

9. Close your eyes and sit quietly for 10-15 minutes. Watch what focus does. Focus on focussing, watch attention itself. Do you move it? Or it moves by itself? Hold focus on breath. See how it moves to thoughts, sensations, feelings, sounds. Is this something you control? What moves attention? Describe what you see.