Hi Ruby88,
Sorry, change of plans, and I will not be your guide after all. We will find you someone else. Please stand by!

Hi Ruby88,
I am a long-time practicing Buddhist and would be pleased to guide you. One constraint though – I would not be able to start until next Tuesday 1/20. I have a very full schedule this week and don't feel I'd be able to give you my proper attention. Would that be ok? If not, we will try and ...

I'm sure you've gone to bed by now, but I wanted to leave you one last message before I disappeared for a month. And that's to express my sincere gratitude for being my guide through this process!! Thank you, thank you, thank you! It must be tremendously satisfying to see people pass through "the ...

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
NO to ALL those!

2) Explain in detail from your own experience what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works. Describe it fully as you see it now.
My confusion ...

Back for another check-in. Yes, the feeling of there being no self there persists.

As I was driving to my appointment, I felt compelled to drive cautiously because it was an odd feeling to realize that "I" wasn't the one driving the car. Feelings of vulnerability were coming up, not knowing for ...

Sometimes insomnia can be a good thing. Last night I was lying awake in bed, and since there was nothing I could do I paid attention to sounds in the room. And as clear as day (ha ha, even though it was the middle of the night) I saw that there really was no me in the middle of it all. Initially it ...

No I can't.

I realize I'm arguing over semantics here, but just to clarify, no I didn't DO it. It just happened to me. I have no idea how it happened. It just did. And therefore I have no idea how to repeat it. That's why I say I don't know how to do it. It's not a question of effort, it's that I don't know ...

Just to clarify the jumping off a cliff thing. It IS about letting go of control. I admit I'm a control freak. I like having things be just so. And the idea of letting go of my self is to a large extent about letting go into a sense of just not knowing what any of this is all about. For a control ...

Yes, you can be assured I have set the reading aside. My intention wasn't to go on a big research project. I just had some nagging questions that my intellect couldn't answer, and I knew there had to be an easy answer. I read Bodhipaksa's Living as River -- his chapter on Consciousness, and I found ...

I spent this morning in my sitting practice investigating what exactly it is that is not convinced. It's now pretty clear that I'm confusing vijnana with self. I can't tell the difference between the two. I can do the direct experience thing as you suggested in your last post, but it doesn't get me ...

Nothing much is up today. I'm a little short on sleep again, so my brain is not fully functional.

I have to say, I'm still stuck on my views around personal achievement. While I completely "get" that it and everything else fall within the realm of Pratitya Samutpada, I'm still having a hard time ...

I knew you'd be pleased, but no, I haven't "got it" yet.

As far as the provisional words, well, I used them on purpose. Because I do see those things in those particular examples, no doubt about it. But my damned ego is still not thoroughly convinced. It's still working overtime trying to come up ...

I was intrigued by your question about examining my most precious beliefs. I zeroed in on this strong compulsion I have to achieve, to make something of myself. And underneath that, I see that there is a part of me that really really did not want to believe that my self doesn't exist. It just did ...

I hope your day retreat went well today!

I did as you advised this morning. When I woke up this morning, I lay awake in bed for a while, just being fully in the moment, in my body, eyes closed, for quite a while. It's a wonderful feeling, first thing in the morning, to savor the soft warmth of the ...