Hi David,

I agree that our momentum has been lost. I think I will probably stop with this line of investigation. I have a tough time remembering to do the exercises when the teachings are by forum text only. I have an in-person teacher for my meditation and that is significantly more motivational ...

Hi David,

I did this exercise sometimes when I remembered. It's one that I find interesting.

Nothing specific to report. I was able to look at bodily sensations in both liking and disliking.

Hi David,

No worries. You have responded to me many times and have given me much of your time and effort. I do not mind waiting for weeks or months. Moving countries must be hard.

I am in New York, visiting family. Their mind state is very much from the past, and I am practicing not getting caught ...

Hi David,

Thank you for those insights.

Does that make sense to you?

It does make sense to me. I am very much focusing on either (a) not trying too hard or (b) paying attention to how the body feels. Sometimes I feel stuck in the emotional headwinds, and sometimes I forget the self-as-obstacle ...

Hi David,

I did not try to post.

For 3-4 days, I lived deeply from the perspective that my state of mind was not in my control. This was a very nice experience. Although that perspective ceased being viscerally primary, I still had a few weeks of heightened well-being.

Now, I am back to where I ...

Hi David,

Thank you. I will take some time and see if this perspective can settle in.

Hi David,

Why do you keep giving this "choice belief" so much credit?
I can only guess. Becoming an adolescent and finding some control over my life for the first time was very important to me. In our discussion, I may be equating with dropping the "choice belief" with dropping my control over my ...

Hi David,

So, when the view on the right is seen, do you have the ‘choice’ not to see?
No.

The question is; can you turn seeing off?
No.

Can you NOT see what is seen?
No.

Same thing with the view on the left, can you NOT see the view on the left?
No.

Same thing with the view in front ...

Feel the frustration in a somatic way, feel the stuckness.
So it's fear. Feel that fear in a somatic way. Feel the fear.
You are exactly right. Stuckness and then fear of stuckness.

I feel all this in my body for a few seconds and then my mind makes some kind of move that intends to become ...

Hi David,

How is the movement controlled?
I can't tell.

Does a thought control it?
Not that I can find.

Can a ‘controller’ of any description be located?
No.

How is the decision made to turn the handover?
I don't know!

Who or what chose which hand - the left or right hand for the ...

Hi David,

Can you stay with those too realization and scan how the sensation react?
I was not able to notice distinct reactions.

Can go throught your day with those in understanding?
I took some time to come back to all of this as I go through out the day.

What is different when you hold ...

Hi David,

The Exploration is the Gift.

Doesn't that make sense?
Yes.
Can you find anywhere where Sergey autonomously intervenes into life, choosing something that is not the product of all the elements; that is not a part of the overall flow?
No.

Where in there is an autonomous entity ...

Hi David,

So you agree that you have no choice?
Yes, although my agreement feels partial.

How does it feel to realize that ?
At once: relieving, demoralizing, doubtful.

Can you stay with this emotion ?
I tried to stay with it. Nothing notable happened.

I think you are talking about ...

Hi David,

Thanks for the explanations.

All the impulse to change your experience is more about esthetics than anything else.
So there is complete freedom of trying to controle and organise your experience as you can and wish.
I don't think I understand this. It seems to conflict with the choice ...

Hi David,

Thanks for all of that.

I think you're right.

Feel that impulse to get better and improve. Feel it in your body in your sensation.
Feel that you didn't choose the pain and the suffering, feel all of it IN YOUR SENSATION.
Feel how you didn't choose to want things to change, feel all of ...