Ready for everything at this point

[cronopio]

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
Mostly semantics. Different teachings has different takes on "self" definition, it can be inner dialog, continuous narration of observable events and of narration itself; it can be glue connecting memories and provides feeling of continuity, attributes memories and feelings to "me". So this little bureaucrat who registers things post-hoc.

What are you looking for at LU?
I care about fighting existential dread and fear of death. I realize this very body and cognition will cease to exist and unless and I realize how to expand my little walled ego into the universe, I will cease to be as an entity, living fear and contemption till the last breath. I don't like that. Yes, I am selfish and bitter, but looking to be a better version of self. I want to connect with the bigger entity, to become fearless, to be that endless space. Right now I just little me playing my little games with myself.

What do you expect from a guided conversation?
Not much really. Friend recommended it, I have zero expectations. Would love to engage it honestly, like I did with many other practices. Expecting it to be practical and focused, without any specific spiritual flavor or illogical nonsense.

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
Got refugee from lama Ole Nydal Diamond Lineage in 2011, on Phowa course. Practicing meditation since, last year almost daily. Mostly Anapana or Vipassana, short practices 10-30 minutes. Sometimes with mantras. Listened to Rupert Spira and Swami Sarvapriyananda (not anymore, Advaita Vedanta is interesting intellectually, but lack specific practices).

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self? 10

[Anastacia42]

My name is Stacy and I can be your guide, if you would like.

First, it is most definitely *not* semantics. LU guides ypu to a shift in perception. It may be subtle & gradual or it may hit you like a ton of bricks. We're not finished until that happens.Up until then it's merely thoughts, labels & stories.

However, is not predictable & we cannot control when this happens. May be quick if you can stop believing thoughts. Or it can take a very long time if you can't LOOK past thoughts.

"Enlightenment is an accident. Meditation makes us accident prone."

Sunryu Suzuki

Read Gateless Gatecrashers downloadable from our Resources link for examples.

One thing that is helpful is to come to this forum
& post every day. Sometimes the site goes down. It will be back. Just come back later.

Yes, if once in a while you must post later, please post a note telling me when you will return.

If you haven't already read the disclaimer, please read it now and just confirm to me that you have read it. Here is the link.

http://liberationunleashed.com/disclaimer-2/

Also please read “Liberation Unleashed is not …” in the FAQ’s of LU. Here is the link.

http://liberationunleashed.com/about/faq/#faq-1041

Some housekeeping guidelines:

1. Post at least once a day, or every second day. If you need more time, or are unable to post for several days, just write a quick post on your thread to let me know please.

2. There is no one judging answers given, so please be 100% honest in your answers and inquiry.

3. This exploration is based on actual experience (AE) - smell, taste, sound, sensation, color and observed thoughts. Long-winded analytical and philosophical answers are best avoided and may even hinder progress. This is not a self-improvement process. There is no ‘self’ to improve.

4. Put aside all other teachings, philosophies, rituals, practices, books/reading and so on for the remainder of this investigation. Really put all your effort and attention in to seeing this reality, as it is. If you have a daily meditation practice, it is fine to continue that but is not necessary for this exploration.

Technology is not perfect and sometimes there is a glitch which can wipe out your responses. It is advisable that you copy and paste questions asked into Word, answer them there and then copy and paste them to your thread. Always save a copy of what you have done, it will save time in the long run!

To begin with, so that we both become aware of what your expectations are about this exploration. In your own words (not from actual experience, but just honest answers), could you please answer the 4 following questions:

How will life change?
How will you change?
What will be different?
What is missing?

Throughout this exploration I would like you to answer all questions that I have written in blue text. Please answer all questions even if I miss using the blue text.

Please answer questions individually, remembering to use the quote function to highlight the question being answered.

Below is a link to the video with instructions on using the Quote Function. Please watch it. Use the PREVIEW button to make sure your text looks right before you hit "SUBMIT."

viewtopic.php?f=4&t=660

What would you like for me to call you? What time zone are you in, please?


Loving,

[Anastacia42]

Fears & expectations are the only things that prevent seeing.

After answering the 4 questions in my first post, please listen to the Introduction & then Zooming in on Death.

Then we'll look at some basics.

Loving,

[cronopio]

Hi Stacy! Before we begin, is it absolutely necessary to have this thread in public? I guess this is part of the method, but couldn't find in FAQ or other docs explanation of this. Obviously the answers I'm going to give can be quite sensitive and having this information available to the whole Internet is a bit worrying.

[Anastacia42]

Well no. I can't imagine what would be so sensitive.. It sounds like you're trying to protect the "self" that does not exist.

There is a Direct Looking process for fear.

https://youtu.be/jKX1llYtlKE?si=jHXuuyyVtp7c-1R2

And this one:

https://youtu.be/fSTT8nc8cvQ?si=Alcukpbi7SUlXpfi

Have you read other threads?

I suppose we could exchange emails here.

What are you trying to protect? And from what?

Loving,

[Anastacia42]

Have you watched the 2 videos i posted for you?

Hopefully, just replying "yes" or no" will not seem "sensitive."

Loving,

[Anastacia42]

Here we are.

Loving

[cronopio]

Have you watched the 2 videos i posted for you?

Hopefully, just replying "yes" or no" will not seem "sensitive."

Loving,

Yes, I watched them. I am well familiar with the method, never was too successful with applying it to myself. Normally introspection session like these, where constant self-inquiring is invloved, brings nothing but dullness and frustration of various degree.

[cronopio]

Here we are.

Loving

Answers.

How will life change?

I hope some people will disappear from my life; people who is in it by accident. I hope to meet new people who is good for me. I hope to continue doing my art without fear of failure and bad feedback or yearning for a good one. I hope to have more love and passion in my life, more music and dance, more energy, more books, more controversy, more thoughts.

How will you change?

I hope I will be less prone to fear of hurting others and not being able to handle their anger or grief; less need for acceptance and of people's love. Less of becoming someone I expect from myself, more of being.

What will be different?

My attitude, my thoughts, my sleep, the way I talk with others, the way I work and make art.

What is missing?

Lack of fear of hurting others, fear of change, fear of not finding my true love. Some spark which I find in me from time to time which sometimes comes with meditation, sometimes from dance, sometimes with making love to someone special, sometimes from using substances.

[Anastacia42]

Good morning,

Each question should have been in Quotes. That will be important later & it helps me read these on my phone. Watch the instruction video in my introduction, please. Use that next time, please.

Your expectations are pretty high. Seeing there's no separate "self" will not magically fix everything in your life. Having those expectations will prevent you from seeing because that's trying to live in a "future." The future doesn't exist. Like the "self " it is nothing more than a thought in your mind. It's not real.

Fears are the other thing that keep you from seeing clearly. Again, they're just thoughts & have no reality outside of your thoughts.

Now what comes up when reading that there is no separate self, never has been, and never will be? That the whole thing was a made up story that we believed.


Loving,