Where am I?

[You]

It was never real. What would have remained longer if another thought had appeared, was only the illusion of it.

[graceabounds]

Beautiful.

Circling back here:

Can you directly find these causes, say causes giving rise to a particular thought? Or is the idea of causality itself another thought, at best a helpful "pragmatic model", whereas what really makes things unfold or be is a mystery?

Yes, I can normally find the causes that give rise to a particular thought. It’s not just an abstract idea.

Here’s a brief exercise:

Sit still facing a wall and see thought after thought emerging.
Look:
Can you actually find any clear cause for any thought to come up?
Or is the “causes” only another thought that is being believed, a useful simplification?

[You]

Did it. Wow. It’s already freeing to see that a thought is not produced by ‘me’… But this goes even deeper.

Can you actually find any clear cause for any thought to come up?

There are associations… For example there was the association between facing the white wall and a thought about zen meditation. But yes, it’s true: “Oh yeah, this must have been the cause - and the only cause - of that thought!” is in itself just another assumption. And why would the white wall trigger exactly this memory? It can not have been inherently the white wall alone and in itself, there could have been other causes in play that were not artificially connected by an extra thought saying “Yep! Here is the cause!”

Or is the “causes” only another thought that is being believed, a useful simplification?

So… Yes to that!

[You]

Discovered more:

These assumptions about causes have their own hook into the illusion of an ‘I’, because even if they are not articulated in words, they have this energy of “Ha! I(!) found the cause!”
And: they are always about the past.

[graceabounds]

Yes exactly.

‘Causes and conditions’ is very useful, as is a raft for a river crossing, but then is no longer needed at a certain point and can be discarded.

even if they are not articulated in words, they have this energy of “Ha! I(!) found the cause!”
And: they are always about the past.

Great catch here. And any past or future references may as well just be flashing neon signs: 'THOUGHT HERE!'

Well dear, I have no further questions... and several other guides have taken a look and they have no further questions so... has what was being sought here been recognized? Anything more you'd like to LOOK into or investigate?

[You]

It has been recognized. Nothing missing, nothing wrong, nothing left to look into or investigate, just THIS, RIGHT HERE. Thank you so much for everything 🤍🙏

[graceabounds]

It has been my absolute pleasure.

Soon you’ll receive an email notifying you of a PM from the forum, inviting you to join LU's Facebook groups should you choose. It also has other information that might be of interest. Your username will change from green to blue and this thread will be moved to the ‘Archive’ section of the forum, but you will be able to access it.

The experience in the past couple of weeks is just the beginning of exploring. It will also be the beginning of cleaning up of all sorts of old beliefs and habitual patterns of thought. You have the tools for this. It can be an emotional process. If you have any questions or any hiccups, you are welcome to drop a line on your thread here and I will respond.

You already know about The Awakening Curriculum. It is a great resource for deeping once you are acclimatized to this new way of being.

Of course it is not necessarily the end of our conversation. You already have my email if you’d like to stay in touch. :)

With gratitude and love,
Becca

[You]

🤍