Hi Wesley
Im fine with all the questions, Im enjoying the looking. Keep em coming :)
JayJ wrote:
Right now im about to have a meeting about my son at his school. There is some anxiety and nervousness.
Those feelings are here and real but i cannot find an actual "I" that owns them. But there still is a sense its my anxiety and nervousness. But without thought or labeling its just a feeling/sensation.
This is great noticing! You have already started looking in the right direction here - What is anxiety? Can you find anything that calls itself "anxiety"? Or just a sensation + a thought - "I am anxious/I feel anxious"? Is anxiety happening to you?
Try this out, read both of these examples below and tell me which best describes your experience when looking to direct experience:
"I am anxious."
Sensation in belly, thought "I am/feel anxious."
Reading "I am anxious" this isnt true in direct experience. There is a feeling in the belly or chest and thoughts saying "I am anxious" but in reality its is just a sensation and that is all. The thoughts added to this sensation are giving the false impression the anxiety is happening to a somebody.
Sensation in belly, thought "I am/feel anxious." This is exactly how it really is just a sensation + thought and all of a sudden this apparent anxiety is owned by a "me"
JayJ wrote:
It is just seeing. No labeling or disecting of anything. It seems like i am looking but its not true as its "on" all the time.
Can you see seeing? When you say "It seems like I am looking," what is the direct experience of "it seems like I am looking"? Could it be just whatever you're looking at (a cup let's say) + a thought "it seems like I'm looking" + sensation (perhaps behind the eyes or in the head)?
Seeing cannot be seen, whats going on here is just seeing. I may look at a cup and a thought might say this is "my cup" but in direct experience there is just seeing a cup. The rest is in thought and yes likely a sensation to go with it like behind the eyes or in the head.
JayJ wrote:
Cannot find an actual "I" just thoughts and feelings that claim to be owned by an I which cannot be located.
Can a feeling actually claim something?
Can a thought actually claim something?
If so, how does it work?
Do sensations know anything about thoughts?
Do thoughts know anything about sensations?
Can a feeling actually claim something?
A feeling is just a sensation in the body, it has no power to claim anything. The feeling is likely due to conditioning and has many labels attached to it. It feels like some kind of defence mechanism.
Can a thought actually claim something?
Thought will try to claim everything and anything but in reality it is just a conditioned/automatic response to stimulus. It is just a version or interpretation of the truth but can NEVER be the actual truth.
If so, how does it work?
It doesn't work :)
Do sensations know anything about thoughts?
No sensations are arising in the body and thought labels these sensations as good or bad, positive or negative. It is quite strange looking at things in this way. If I sit with "anxiety" without labelling it or adding thoughts it is just a sensation and quickly leaves. Adding thought to it is like the snowball effect, I can see how people can have panic attacks as they are buying into the thoughts over the bare sensation.
Do thoughts know anything about sensations?
Same as above, thoughts are trying to label sensations but really have no idea whatsoever.
Thank you for helping me to keep looking
Jay
