After many books/talks, I feel an approaching, elveloping se

[SueYen]

What brings you to Liberation Unleashed?:
After many years reading and listening to Eckhart Tolle, Rupert Spira, Tony Parson, Jeff Foster and the like, I found my way here through a youtube wormhole that lead to a 'Paul Hedderman video. Then a 'Paul Hedderman' google search lead me here! I love that we get to get to where we need to be. I feel I am experiencing a feeling of being on a cusp or approaching a shift/change and that perhaps trusting and falling/letting go and then trusting again is part of the process of seeing or being in tune with experiencing 'true existence' or whatever label fits oneness and what is. I like the feel of 'there is only isness' I feel my times 'aware and in deliberate choice of thoughts and actions' is increasing.

What are you looking for? What do you expect from this?:
I like the sound of having a guide to assist in pointing the way without agenda, with love and kindness. Having the opportunity to share/discuss and explore experiences with people who have similar experiences or questions or intention will be a new experience for me and I hope would be beneficial to all involved.

What is your background in terms of seeking and inquiry?:
Many books (the ones listed above are the one that resonated with me) and talks. I am aware of moving into a more kind of inner knowing and self directed questioning/discovering more so that absorbing others (always wonderful, enlightening and helpful) material/information. I do feel like a shift is currently unfurling. I feel (when I am present)calmer and quieter and more introspective.

How ready are you to question your beliefs about who you are and see the truth no matter what? On a scale from one to ten (ten being most ready). : 11

[KevinD]

Hi SueYen,

I can work with you if you like.
Do you want to be addressed as SueYen, or something else?

Just for reference sake, what time zone are you in?
It just gives me a better idea when to watch for your posts.

I like your selection of teachers, they resonated for me too.

You and I will simply have a conversation, the aim of which will be for you to make the realisation that there is no 'self'. That will be our focus. I will tend to ask various questions and set you some exercises, but nobody will be judging you. You can't get this wrong.

This process is a guided inquiry where specific areas can be examined. I am not a teacher. This is YOUR inquiry. I will not be giving you new ideas and beliefs; only assisting you in examining and questioning the ones that you already have.

Okay, let's get down to business.
A few preliminaries to get out of the way first.

• You agree to post at least once a day, even if only to say, "still here!"
• I am not your teacher, all I can do is point, you look, until clear seeing happens.
• In general, I will ask questions, you look deeply and honestly, and respond.
• Responses require simple, uncontrived honest looking. There are no wrong or right answers.
• Responses are best from direct experience (felt senses and observed thoughts). Long-winded analytical and philosophical answers, and stream of consciousness answers are best avoided and may even hinder progress.
• Put aside all other teachings, philosophies and such for the remainder of this investigation. Really put all your effort and attention into seeing this reality, as it is. If you have a daily and essential meditation practice, it is fine to continue that.
• Please learn to use the quote function; See these instructions

 
If you haven't already seen it, there is intro info here, our disclaimer and a short video too.
For the sake of your success, I ask that you be 100 per cent honest. If you can manage that, this process will be much more efficient.
 
For ease of seeing, my questions will appear in bold text.
 
If you could confirm you have seen all the above and would like me to be your guide - then we shall begin.
 
What are your expectations for this process?
How will it change you?
How will this feel?
 
You can press 'subscribe to this topic in the blue bar at the bottom of this page and receive an email every time I post here.

Good to have you here,

Kevin

Best,
Kevin

[SueYen]

Hi Kevin,

I posted a reply but don't see it here and have not heard back from you.

Perhaps I didn't post it correctly.

Please let me know if you get this before I reply again. Thank you

Susan

[KevinD]

Hi Susan,
I did not receive a reply.
Web glitch, it happens.
I encourage people to write observations on a word program, then copy and paste it in here.
That way you don't lose it entirely.
Best,
Kevin

[SueYen]

Thanks Kevin.

Shall do.

[SueYen]

Hi Kevin,
I would very much appreciate you being my guide. Thank you for your kind offer.

Do you want to be addressed as SueYen, or something else?

Susan is Fine

Just for reference sake, what time zone are you in?
It just gives me a better idea when to watch for your posts.

I live in Tasmania Australia which equates to + 5 hr then minus 24 during ‘daylight savings time’. (Australian Eastern Daylight Time (AEDT).

If you could confirm you have seen all the above and would like me to be your guide - then we shall begin.

Yes, I have.

What are your expectations for this process?

To experience what is, in the absence of personality. To let go of attachment to what others think and say. To discover and be at ease with who/what I ‘truly Am’ without the emotional attachments that ‘seem’ to cause disruption to what could be a harmonious state… Ah, sweet acceptance. I taste it more and more when I am very present and aware and focused on only that.

How will it change you?

I will live (be/experience) from a confident belief in being true to me regardless of others point of view and beliefs. Accepting all others for who and how they are (realising that there are no others?) Free of fear and worry in acceptance of whatever is, in this – the one eternal moment.

How will this feel?

Beautiful, liberating, peaceful, calm, loving, joyful, true, spacious, REAL.


Question. Can I read the Gateless Gatecrashers during this process? Or your web posts?

Good to have you here,

Good to be here. Thank you.

Susan

[KevinD]

Hi Susan,

Thanks for your answers.

What are your expectations for this process?

To experience what is, in the absence of personality. To let go of attachment to what others think and say. To discover and be at ease with who/what I ‘truly Am’ without the emotional attachments that ‘seem’ to cause disruption to what could be a harmonious state… Ah, sweet acceptance. I taste it more and more when I am very present and aware and focused on only that.

All of the above seems quite reasonable and may be an occurrence.
I can't promise you that, and I urge you not to expect it.
This experience can come in many ways, and to watch for one or two, may mean missing a real happening.

How will it change you?

I will live (be/experience) from a confident belief in being true to me regardless of others point of view and beliefs. Accepting all others for who and how they are (realising that there are no others?) Free of fear and worry in acceptance of whatever is, in this – the one eternal moment.

Please see above answer.
This may or may not occur.

How will this feel?

Beautiful, liberating, peaceful, calm, loving, joyful, true, spacious, REAL.

Again, this seems like a reasonable expectation.
However, expectations are a real problem to walking through this process.
Authentic experiences can be missed by expectations that tell you "That's not it."
Please drop any and all expectations, they will not serve you well.

Can you manage to drop all expectations during this process?

Question. Can I read the Gateless Gatecrashers during this process? Or your web posts?

Yes, but please make that your only spiritual teaching for the duration of this process.
Continue meditation if you want, but for our short time together, please shelve other practices.

Okay, onward we go.

What comes up when it is read that there is absolutely no “you” in any way, shape or form, there never has been a “you”, nor is there or will be there ever be?
When you say "I", what does that refer to in direct experience? Please describe in detail – does it have a shape? A size? A quality?

Best,

Kevin

[SueYen]

Kevin,

I posted my answers this morning and I now cannot see my post. Shall post this then go out and come back and check before I try again.

Susan

[SueYen]

Hi Kevin,

Here goes... My answers are different this second time around.

Can you manage to drop all expectations during this process?

Yes.

What comes up when it is read that there is absolutely no “you” in any way, shape or form, there never has been a “you”, nor is there or will be there ever be?

Emptiness, numb, sadness.

When you say "I", what does that refer to in direct experience?

It's not me. There is nothing there that exists as 'I'. It's like a blank piece of paper.

Please describe in detail – does it have a shape? A size? A quality?

I become aware of the middle, top part of my head tingling.I feel like it is inaccessible like 'm encased in a grey glass rectangle and the I is outside that and indefinable.

[KevinD]

Hi Susan,

Good observations.
I'm heartened that you feel sadness and emptiness when you hear there is no I.
It suggests you take it seriously, and understand there is a perceived loss involved with that understanding.


Let's take a look at self as the experiencer:

Another key angle that is taken is about the role of the self as the observer, experiencer, witness, or perceiver. This can be questioned as such:

• In direct experience, can you find an “I” that experiences experience?
• Is there a seer separate from the seen?
• Is there a hearer that hears?

[/b]

Nice work, keep it up.

Best,
Kevin

[SueYen]

What are your expectations for this process?

Wait and see - Trust. I am where I am.

How will it change you?

Unknown. Maybe not much will change.

How will this feel?

Will wait and see. Smoother?

[KevinD]

Hi Susan,

Good answers to the top questions.

Let's take a look at self as the experiencer:

Another key angle that is taken is about the role of the self as the observer, experiencer, witness, or perceiver. This can be questioned as such:

• In direct experience, can you find an “I” that experiences experience?
• Is there a seer separate from the seen?
• Is there a hearer that hears?

[/b]


Best,
Kevin

[SueYen]

In direct experience, can you find an “I” that experiences experience?

More an observation. a happening.

Is there a seer separate from the seen?

First comes distraction from observed/labeled pain sensations in my back. Then just seeing with an afterwards tinge of sadness sensation in my chest of loss. (of self???)

Is there a hearer that hears?

Just sound. more sadness (close to tears). then distraction with back pain then felt sensation around ears. then awareness of edges of physical body.

[KevinD]

Hi Susan,

Great observations so far.
Loss and sadness aren't bad signs.
They are just energy. Please feel them fully.

Here is an interesting exercise on control.

Take a look at this video first (just the delivery, the Q and A is interesting, but not critical.

http://youtu.be/ih6f-0T2Ow0

Select one of your arms - It doesn't matter which.
When you have done that, rest for a moment and then when you want to, raise that arm into the air (or don't).
Examine the actual experience. Do this as many times as you like, and each time inquire…

• 
  
• What is this 'I' that is controlling the arm?
  
• Can a controlling 'I' be located?
  
• What is this 'I' that is choosing which arm to raise?
  
• Can you find an 'I' that is doing the choosing?
  
• How is decision made?

Great work,

Kevin

[SueYen]

Hello Kevin,

Thanks for the video link. Great talk. Have been thinking about this recently.

After replying last time I thought that perhaps the attention going to physical sensations (back or head etc.) may be the ego, using distraction, 'hijacking' the situation - fearing it's demise and attempting control???

What is this 'I' that is controlling the arm?

It's insubstantial and not found (a thought perhaps and nothing more).

Can a controlling 'I' be located?

Again I experience a physical sensation - this time like I am wearing a triangle shaped cap on my head. otherwise NO. Although it does feel like it is in my head (thoughts/instructions).

What is this 'I' that is choosing which arm to raise?

A voice I hear in my head.

Can you find an 'I' that is doing the choosing?

I can't locate it in space.

How is decision made?

Randomly, then mind comes in to adhere to it or change it. Sometimes (or perhaps every time?) felt physical sensations call attention to one arm or the other and that decides which arm is chosen (seemingly at random but not so in the light of further investigation.) them mind - as I mentioned - chooses to go with that or change it.