I assume you can see that you have no real control over thoughts, intentions, movements, etc etc?
And that you cant find any separate self?

Like just in a very simple nothing special way? And then just let all this sink in. That we can speak of separate selfs relationally, this way thinking has ...

Hey Elad,

Thank you again.

It seems that there’s still a belief that I don’t deserve to see no self, otherwise it’d have happened by now. I do see the paradoxical nature of a separate self wanting to see that there’s no separate self. It just keeps coming down to not really knowing what else to ...

Hey Elad, just an update on where things seem to be now—

I’m still sticking with the question “what am I.” Looking feels open-ended. “What am I?” then… a space. The feeling right now is a mostly relaxed, but somewhat urgent or expectant sense of looking. This even though the mind knows at some ...

Yes. Ok, thank you.

That sounds like a good approach to me as well.

I'll use "what am I?"

Simple and direct. I will keep "in mind" not staying focused on thinking when that comes up.

There is a story that unless I'm completely aware of being aware that that's not being "awake." I notice though I can be lost in activity or even thought and not suffering, or even selfing at all. Life is happening unimpeded and it's fine.

There is also a story that filtering reality through ...

Hi Elad,

where the interest in THIS is felt as clearly superior to the interest in the ego story/enlightenment story.

I like that. There seems to be a noticeable back and forth between thoughts and stories of a character on a trajectory to make life better and interest in “this.” It seems like ...

Hey Elad, thank you again.

What exactly is it that you really find NOW that you feel you need to protect? And how exactly would you wish to relate with it differently NOW?

Right now at this very moment it is clear there’s nothing that needs protection. At this moment there is just sitting here ...

What is it that you feel you need to protect, that you wish you did not feel a need to protect? And how would you exactly wish you would feel about it instead?

I can see when I watch the body move that it’s definitely not “me” doing it. It’s just doing. When I’m talking to someone and step back ...

Who told you that honesty requires comparison? What is actually here, right now, before any comparison arises?

No one told me that, I think what I’m referring to is wanting to be honest about labeling a “seeing” correctly as such. As an example, your name in this forum is red and mine is green ...

Thank you again,

It very well could be that the recognition happened that was gradual and I just didn’t notice it. It’s quite clear that life over the last several months has changed in many significant ways. What you said here feels like, at least at some level, an accurate description of what is ...

Hey Elad,
I don't really know why I disappeared but I'm very happy that you checked in--thank you. I'm not sure how best to describe what's going on here. I've continued looking almost constantly but it's more of a noticing feeling than a seeking feeling. I'll do exercises sometimes when it comes up ...

Hey Elad,
I’ve done the exercises, many of them many times, especially #8 :)

It’s been a mixture of experiences--

Noticing that there’s still some fear and reticence. Allowing it. It feels like it’s moving through, sometimes almost literally like energy moving through parts of the body.

Noticing ...

What would reality being "thin" or "solid" mean in direct experience?

In direct experience ... I’m not really sure. It seems that it’s just a thought to describe direct experience that way. It’s not so much that I don’t find thin or solid in DE, as that it’s hard to give attributes to direct ...

I did the exercise several times--feeling the face and head, then looking at the mirror. It takes a few times before I get past the mind having a preset narrative about what happened before it even happens. With the inside of the mouth especially it feels like it’s a very abstract feeling that is ...

I like that I don’t even really know why these exercises are related. I know I could probably get there conceptually but I’m sort of consciously avoiding doing that.

It’s pretty clear how the feeling of a hand is there--it’s not so much a “hand-like” feeling as it is just a cloud of sensation or ...