New Member - Wanting a Guide

[annaaiyar]

Hi

Nothing much to write at this stage. I guess words will just unfold when in conversation. If someone is free greatly appreciate it.

With Metta

Anusha

[deezer]

Hello Anusha,

Words unfolding sounds very nice. I would be happy to be your guide and help you see that there is no separate self/entity.

My name is Diarmuid but it's mouthful so just 'd' is fine.


There are a few standard ground rules before we start:

You agree to post at least once a day, even if only to say that you're still around, and I'll do the same. Sometimes it might just not be possible for one of us to post substantively and of course we'd find a way to work round that.

I am not your teacher, all I can do is point and you look, until clear seeing happens.

In general, I will ask questions and you look deeply and respond with 100% honesty.

Responses require simple, uncontrived, honest looking. There are no wrong or right answers.

Responses are best from direct experience (the physical evidence of seeing, hearing, touching, tasting, smelling, prior to the story or explanation about them). Long-winded, analytical and philosophical or stream of consciousness answers are best avoided and may even hinder progress. Just listen very closely to the answers that arise in you, and answer to the very best of your ability at that time. (Read the article at http://liberationunleashed.com/articles ... xperience/ for more help on distinguishing what is direct experience.)

Put aside all other teachings, philosophies etc. for the duration of this investigation. Really put all your effort and attention into seeing this reality, as it is. (If you have a daily and essential meditation practice, it's ok to continue with that. And it's fine to read threads in this forum and the Gateless Gatecrashers book.)

Please learn to use the quote function, see viewtopic.php?f=4&t=660 for instructions.

If you haven't already seen it, there is intro info at http://www.liberationunleashed.com/, together with our disclaimer and a short video.

Please confirm that you have seen these, that you agree to the disclaimer, and that you'd like me to be your guide and then we'll begin.

Let's start with a summary of what you're looking for and what you expect to find.

What are your expectations for this process?

What is it that you are searching for?

How will you know that you found it?

How will this feel?

How will this change you?

Finally, here's a couple of helpful points:

1) You can press 'subscribe to this topic' in the blue bar at the bottom of this page and receive a notification email every time I post here.

2) The site has a nasty habit of logging you out while you write a reply, which can mean you lose what you have written. One way to avoid this is to write elsewhere, then just paste the message into the 'reply' window when you're ready to send.

And don't worry, I don't intend to send any more posts this long, if I can help it! This is just to set things up for you nicely.

I look forward to reading your reply,

d

[annaaiyar]

Thank you d,

All contents noted and agreed :) English is the 2nd language but will try to give direct, simple answers.

What are your expectations for this process?

surrender to the universe (if one may call that word), to unfold itself to the benefit of all... , guess that is an expectation too :)

What is it that you are searching for?

Past was a searcher... in Hindu, Christian, Buddhist backgrounds... after many physical and physiological experiences, mind illusions it has fallen into a place and at times a witness, at times unaware whether witnessing or non-witnessing and the observer has vanished in the doing day to day life tasks...

How will you know that you found it?

glimpses of unawareness whether witnessing or non-witnessing and the observer has vanished in the doing day to day life tasks...
spontaneous happenings during the day,,,, then back to the witnessing stage when in silence...
in action the witness has disappeared or not disappeared, not knowing... empty
if you know what I mean :)

How will this feel?

Attachment has and continue to fall... to be free from concepts/ideas/views/beliefs

How will this change you?

honestly Don't know

[annaaiyar]

Thank you d

[deezer]

Hi Anusha,

Thank you for such clear and honest answers. It is safe to say that we all have expectations of what an ‘awakening’ will be like. It is important that we drop those expectations now. I can see you already understand this, but now it’s important to do it. Expectations can often get in the way of this process and sometimes completely stop it. After all the expectations are just a thought story with no relevance to reality.

One idea that also gets in the way is that awakening means attaining a ‘state’ different from what one is experiencing normally. We are not trying to attain anything. We are simply going to look at our experience of what is happening at any given moment.

From what I have seen the results also differ from person to person. But what is sure is that when you see through the illusion of a separate self then you will know, experientially rather than intellectually


So lets put aside expectations and begin

Moving on towards the core of this work - just look at the following statement, and ponder it every which way you can:

Nothing exists outside the present moment.

Can you find anything, anything at all, that does?

And next:

There is no self at all, no manager, no controller, no doer, thinker, watcher, none as in zero. All there is is life flowing freely, as one movement of totality, that includes all.

What thoughts, sensations, feelings come up? If there is fear, what feels threatened?

:-)

d

[annaaiyar]

Hi d,

Nothing exists outside the present moment. - yes just empty

Can you find anything, anything at all, that does? - not in action, all is one unitary movement... no watcher, being, doer or anything at all. but when no body movements/action ... in silence.. can go into no thought mode.. but the witness is witnessing the "no thought" or "thought" mode... or body vibrations awareness is happening.. this awareness is also an illusion "who is watching the vibrations?"... a thought comes, itself knows that it is an illusion, comes... and dissolves..

There is no self at all, no manager, no controller, no doer, thinker, watcher, none as in zero. All there is is life flowing freely, as one movement of totality, that includes all. - yes except at times the witnessing (or watcher) I told in earlier paragraph... but not permanent it comes and then ONE unitary movement happens spontaneously and there no watcher, some times the witnessing happening... all comes and go.. :)

What thoughts, sensations, feelings come up? If there is fear, what feels threatened? - when typing happens - unaware whether there are thoughts or not, witnessing or not, a doer or not.. zero... or totally blankness but see the pc, typing no identification...

if i stop... no doer but can feel the body vibrations (awareness)

feelings none at this current moment..

thank you so much
with metta
anusha

[deezer]

Hi Anusha,

Thank you for your anwers.

I want you to put aside the ideas you have learned before while we do this. From now on, as much as possible, I want you to look at your experience and find the answers there. To emphasis this we call say look at the Direct Experience (DE) but this is just a symbol to focus you on what you are experiencing here and now.

Here is a good article about DE. Please read it and let me know what you think.

http://liberationunleashed.com/articles ... xperience/

Also please learn to use the quote function. This will make our communication much easier to read through. Here is where you can find the instructions:

http://liberationunleashed.com/nation/v ... ?f=4&t=660

Nothing exists outside the present moment. - yes just empty

Does emptiness exist outside the present moment?

but the witness is witnessing the "no thought" or "thought" mode

Describe this witness (from DE) where does it reside? How does it witness?

a thought comes, itself knows that it is an illusion

Can a thought know a thought? How does it happen?

yes except at times the witnessing (or watcher) I told in earlier paragraph... but not permanent it comes and then ONE unitary movement happens spontaneously and there no watcher, some times the witnessing happening

Is the flow stopped when the witnessing happens?

if i stop... no doer but can feel the body vibrations (awareness)

I'll come back to this after your next post.

Thank you,

d

[annaaiyar]

Hi d, thank you

Does emptiness exist outside the present moment?

no

Describe this witness (from DE) where does it reside? How does it witness?

middle of the heart.... in being

Can a thought know a thought? How does it happen?

no, thought happens...

How does it happen?

no thought happening just being, subtle awareness that is all

Is the flow stopped when the witnessing happens?

what flow?

[deezer]

Hi Anusha,

Nice work with the quote function :-)

Describe this witness (from DE) where does it reside? How does it witness?

middle of the heart.... in being

Is there a witness separate from the experience? Tell me where the line of separation is, describe it as much as possible.

There is no self at all, no manager, no controller, no doer, thinker, watcher, none as in zero. All there is is life flowing freely, as one movement of totality, that includes all.

- yes except at times the witnessing (or watcher)

Does life stop flowing freely when there is witnessing, or is the witnessing part of life flowing freely?

Thanks,

d

[annaaiyar]

thanks d, for everything.

is there a witness separate from the experience? Tell me where the line of separation is, describe it as much as possible.

is it ok i get it from the past experience ? as all right now happening is typing no thoughts, no witness in typing just action and sound,,,,, of the typing all happening at once.

Does life stop flowing freely when there is witnessing, or is the witnessing part of life flowing freely?

witnessing part of life flowing freely, but in action, all merges into one unitary movement. hope this clarifies because words are very limited to what can be experienced...

1. action all in one unitary movement can be explained as this - a thought might jump like flash of lightening, (jumping is witnessed), bread.... spontaneous movement from the bed to kitchen, looking at the cupboard... these movements from the bed, walking to the kitchen, sounds of footsteps, opening the cupboard wipes from memory sort of a thing, hard to explain sorry :).... in action no thoughts just happening... action of putting butter... coming back to bed, "on pc", on pc, watch "sparks of thought" to action... action happens .... forgotten...

[annaaiyar]

more on this free life flowing witnessing when action stops

hand pain... witnessing this pain but no identification or thoughts just watching... but at times thoughts come about a matter but immediately "aha comes" and the thought process stops...

you asked earlier about fear

not now, therefore have to take it from memory... driving, car in front, no time to analyse energy arise in the middle of the chest, breaks, in zero, flash of a second all happens no thinking... just spontaneous... but witnessing the energy arise in the middle of the chest... fear ...

sorry words are limited... thank you so much d

[deezer]

Hi Anusha,

Very well said. Thank you for being so clear.


From direct experience:

Does the body experience sensations and thoughts?

Is the "body" just another thought label for sensations (namely tactile & kinaesthetic)?

Thanks,

d

[deezer]

Sorry Anusha,

Your second post arrived as I was typing my reply. So we have a bit of overlap.
I have to go, I'll get back to you soon,

d

[annaaiyar]

:)

Does the body experience sensations and thoughts?

no how can it be?

Is the "body" just another thought label for sensations (namely tactile & kinaesthetic)?

don't know the meaning actile & kinaesthetic :) sorry

Is the "body" just another thought label for sensations

wait please ,,, looking :), (DE), body no identification as "my body"... but awareness is there... when awareness moves inside, sensations are felt not to an "I" separate, to awareness itself. it feels the sensations, pains, vibrations but just looking... then awareness moves to out, noises around , looking seeing happening that is all...

when action happening.... all is one,,, no awareness exists

thank you

[annaaiyar]

when action happening.... all is one,,, no awareness exists

sorry wrongly written, when action happening all is one, no awareness or awareness is happening don't know.. no looking or seeing happening