Am here to deconstruct my ‘self’

[Jarf1shRaw]

Yeah, I guess there's still part of me was still questioning this through mind.

Can you find an EXPERIENCER of sound happening, sensations happening, seeing happening?

No. I've been inquiring on this for a few days since your reply and it seems there isn't anywhere where there's an actual experiencer separate from the sensations/sounds/visuals. There are times though when looking for the experiencer/the one seeing where the mind is just confused and doesn't know what to make of it, like "Am I even doing this right?". These is just more thoughts right?

Is there sound + a hearer? or simply hearing happening?

In direct experience its just happening.

One love!

[graceabounds]

Is there someone continuing a process called “inquiring”?

Is there anything here that is not simply what is happening?

:)

[Jarf1shRaw]

Is there someone continuing a process called “inquiring”?

Ha. It's been arising in experience as if there's a need to reference your pointers/remember to look for the hearer or the see-er. But guess that's just happening of it's own accord.

Is there anything here that is not simply what is happening?

No because even do-ership are thought patterns arising of it's own volition.

This thread has literally brought the mind to a stand still. There was a felt urge to ask a follow up question about choice and no choice, self and no self, but it just feels pointless. Like at this point I don't even know what I'm asking. It all feels like the questions I'm asking already have a non-conceptual answer which shuts down the need to ask the question.

The mind isn't used to this lol. It might be giving up :)

Love
Jarfish

[graceabounds]

Haha…
Anything left to ask?

What is the lived experience day to day this week?
:)

Big love,
Becca

[graceabounds]

PS- how is it going with mind ‘giving up’?
Any doubts or reservations?

[Jarf1shRaw]

Anything left to ask?

What even is 'this that wants ___ ' other than resistance itself?

What is the lived experience day to day this week?
:)

Feels like an oscillation of attention between thought, visuals, sensation and then the awareness itself shifting from one to the other. Sometimes there's distraction and sometimes it's clear. Either way it's all lived and happening ;)

PS- how is it going with mind ‘giving up’?
Any doubts or reservations?

One thing I've noticed which sort of ties into the first question: Is when there are these moments of no-mind and peace, there's then a want to keep that state longer and preserve it and get more and more of it. Almost like a craving for it because of how good it feels. I can imagine this is another form of lack and a craving mechanism that wants to grasp?

The falling away of even that would be nice. But i guess by just letting it appear is already enough lol.

Big love!

[graceabounds]

Hello dear,

Wonderful questions. And they are the natural next ones to arise after the seeing through self. What is this that wants (and by extension doesn’t want) what simply is?

In Buddhism there is a list of what are called Fetters, or illusions. The very first is seeing through a separate self, which is what we work through here on Liberation Unleashed. Desire and Aversion are the 4th and 5th of 10 fetters outlined in this system.

There are some resources out there. I worked with The Awakening Curriculum (on youtube or their .com) in the months after going through LU myself and it was quite effective in working through it and “breaking” it.

This is another very good and condensed introduction I find useful: https://youtu.be/eye33kD4uSI?si=-Vc20O0IxikzraEa

And since we find ourselves here, it appears that the Gateless Gate has been crossed… but as you know there is no Gate, no one to cross it, and no end to the journey.

Soon you’ll receive an email notifying you of a PM from the forum, inviting you to join LU's Facebook groups. It also has other information that might be of interest. Your username will change from green to blue and this thread will be moved to the ‘Archive’ section of the forum, but you will be able to access it.

If you have any questions or hiccups at all in the continued unfolding you are welcome to drop a line here or I’ll forward my email.

Big love!!
Becca