Looking and seeing

[CherylVT]

Dear Lucia,

Focus on the image of “me,” the separate individual entity.
Is it an image or an actual entity?

No, not an image nor a separate entity, just a feeling of “me”. I mean, if I stop and think about it, I see that it isn’t something real: it isn’t my body, but it seems to be something in my head, as it was the owner of body and thoughts. They’re mine and not yours….this is the feeling.

In DE, we are quite specific about how we use the words of the 5 senses + thought.
Also, "feeling" has 12 definitions in English. Ai-yi-yi. So.

"They're mine and not yours." is a thought, not a feeling.

Say "I. I. I" (in Italian) out loud several times.
Where is the "I" located?
Be as specific as you can be.

Say "Me. Me. Me." (in Italian) out loud several times.
Where is the "me" located?

Love,
Cheryl

[Lucia73]

Ciao Cheryl

Say "I. I. I" (in Italian) out loud several times.
Where is the "I" located?
Be as specific as you can be.

Say "Me. Me. Me." (in Italian) out loud several times.
Where is the "me" located?

When I say “I” or “me” it sounds empty, it’s clearly a sound and nothing else.
I have enough evidence that “I” is nothing real, but the thought “I” still arises as “I” was real…

Love,
Lucia

[CherylVT]

Dear Lucia,

a feeling of “me”. I mean, if I stop and think about it, I see that it isn’t something real: it isn’t my body, but it seems to be something in my head, as it was the owner of body and thoughts. They’re mine and not yours….this is the feeling.

Where is this feeling of "me"?
Be as specific as you can (though it may be quite general. e.g., the head)

love,
cheryl

[Lucia73]

Hi Cheryl,

Sorry for my late reply but I had the 18eth birthday of one daughter and the 20 th of the other daughter + hard times at work… it’s a busy period.
In any case I thought about this feeling or sensation of me and sometimes is located in the head, sometimes only in the chest, in the area behind the sternum. When I am working it’s strongly located in the head, when I am relaxed it’s only in the chest.
It’s like it was lightly ever present in the chest and become obscured by the sensation in the mind when the mind is activated.

Thank you for your guidance ❤️
Lucia

[CherylVT]

Thanks Lucia.

This "feeling of me"--sometimes in the head, sometimes in the chest--
What exactly IS the "feeling of me"?

Use the Direct Experience labels--seeing, hearing, tasting, touching, smelling, and thought to describe this "feeling."

Be specific.

Love,
Cheryl

[Lucia73]

Hi Cheryl,

What exactly IS the "feeling of me"?

Use the Direct Experience labels--seeing, hearing, tasting, touching, smelling, and thought to describe this "feeling."

I can’t touch it, nor smelling, hearing, seeing…..it’s the result of a thought.
The question now is how to get rid of this thought, ‘cause even if I see it’s a thought, even if it’s clear the difference between reality and imagination, still seems incredible that “I” it’s just imagination….it is imagination but I still have the thought “I” present in my head.
For example, today I knew that my youngest daughter have a problem with her notes in chemistry and “I” feel guilty for not helping her enough with her studies.
The “I” typically arises when feeling guilty for something and is very strong.
When things are going well the thought “I” isn’t so strong or there isn’t at all…

Love ❤️
Lucia

[CherylVT]

Dear Lucia,

Yes. The "feeling" of me/I is a thought.

how to get rid of this thought

Oh! Isn't the "I" being so helpful. "Here, let me (the I) help you (the I) get rid of the I."
The ego does not want to die. It will try every trick in the book to make sure it survives. The I is not interested in its own demise. Just think of the fear of death. That's the ego fearing that it will die (which, of course, it will).

Set this thought--how can "I" get rid of this I-thought-- set that thought aside. Don't pay attention to it.
DO pay attention to your direct experience.

Love,
Cheryl

[CherylVT]

Dear Lucia,

For the next exercise I want you to sit somewhere quiet and observe thoughts.

A thought appears. In that moment is there anyone or anything which recognizes the thought or is aware of it?
Can you see anything that is separate from the thought and does the thinking?
Where do thoughts appear from?
Do they appear randomly or in a structured way?
Is there anything that is responsible for the thoughts like a traffic cop saying which one to go and which one to stay?
Can the flow of thoughts be changed?
Watch like a hawk.

Write down a sequence of 5 thoughts in the order that they appear. Now check:
Could you predict the order of their appearance?
Did you know which will be the second or the fourth?
Can you stop them midway? How long does that last? Test it for the fun of exploration.
Are they 100% true?
What are you, when you don't think about what you are?

Love
Cheryl

[Lucia73]

Wow, this is very interesting...

A thought appears. In that moment is there anyone or anything which recognizes the thought or is aware of it?

No..there is anyone or anything that is aware of the thoughts: there is just awareness of the though.

Can you see anything that is separate from the thought and does the thinking?

No, there is nothing that does the thinking, the thinking happens in form of thoughts, so they aren't separate.

Where do thoughts appear from?

From nowhere...they just pop up in my head.

Do they appear randomly or in a structured way?

They appear randomly, maybe they have a common subject for some time, but then also the subject changes randomly.

Is there anything that is responsible for the thoughts like a traffic cop saying which one to go and which one to stay?

No no, they appear and that's all.

Can the flow of thoughts be changed?

Well, this is tricky...I can be aware of thought not good, and decide to direct the awareness towards other perceptions like direct experience of the senses. I can fix my attention on the breath and ignore the thoughts until they cease. I cannot say that I can change the thoughts, but I can decide to shift my attention to other perceptions until my thoughts also calm down.
The "I" that decide to switch the attention it's another thought but this time it's followed by actions.

Could you predict the order of their appearance?
Did you know which will be the second or the fourth?
Can you stop them midway? How long does that last? Test it for the fun of exploration.
Are they 100% true?

No for all the questions, whithout any doubts.

What are you, when you don't think about what you are?

mmmh...perceptions. Just perceptions.

Thank you Cheryl!
Love
Lucia

[CherylVT]

Dear Lucia,

I'm traveling and away from home for this long weekend, so my response will not be as prompt as usual.

Here is another exercise to watch your thoughts:

Sit quietly for about 30 minutes and notice the arising thoughts.
Just let them appear as they appear. Try your best to COMPLETELY ignore what they are
saying and just notice how they appear without you doing anything at all.

Where are they coming from and going to?
Did you do anything to make a particular thought or thoughts appear?
Could you have done anything to make a different thought appear at that exact moment
instead?
Can you predict your next thought?
Can you select from a range of thoughts to have only pleasant thoughts?
Can you choose not to have painful, negative or fearful thoughts?
Can you pick and choose any kind of thought?
Is it possible to prevent a thought from appearing?
The contents of thought cannot be known except by other thoughts.
It requires other thoughts to give that thought meaning.

Love,
Cheryl

[Lucia73]

Hello Cheryl!

Did you do anything to make a particular thought or thoughts appear?

No, I don’t…I cannot manage when they appear, their content, lifetime before disappearing.

Could you have done anything to make a different thought appear at that exact moment
instead?

No, unfortunately not.

Can you predict your next thought?

Not at all

Can you select from a range of thoughts to have only pleasant thoughts?

No, I can’t. There isn’t a library of thoughts 😜

Can you choose not to have painful, negative or fearful thoughts?

Unfortunately not.

Can you pick and choose any kind of thought?

No, impossible

Is it possible to prevent a thought from appearing?

No, no way. They appear and have a life of their own.


So all the literature about positive thinking it’s rubbish and this is really very comforting, since I never managed to put in practice and felt responsible of all the negative things in my life because of my thoughts!


💗
Lucia

[Lucia73]

I forgot this:

Where are they coming from and going to?

Don’t know….from nowhere to nowhere maybe. Or from another energetic level…in any case not from “me”, I do not consciously produce them, I just hear them in my head.
Surely there are brain mechanisms at work but not that I can voluntarily produce or control.

Ciao, L.

[Lucia73]

Dear Cheryl,
Hope you’re fine.
I am going to travel to Marrakesh for few days without IPad or laptop, I’ll be back on Sunday.

Love, Lucia

[CherylVT]

Dear Lucia,

Well, my long weekend had a couple of extra twists and turns. Marrakesh sounds lovely.
Thanks for your patience.


Do senses exist physically as receivers/detectors?
How is that observed?
Are there eyes, ears, mouth…?
Let me ask again, is there a seer who sees color or just seeing?

Also, is there a clear boundary between seeing, hearing, tasting, etc?
Or just thought describes them as separate?
Can you separate the hearing from the seeing?
Even with your eyes closed you still see color. Are there separate senses or just experiencing?

Love,
Cheryl

[Lucia73]

Dear Cheryl,

no problem at all :-)

Do senses exist physically as receivers/detectors?

How is that observed?
Are there eyes, ears, mouth…?

As far as I can see there are eyes, mouth, ears but I cannot find senses….just sensations: seeing, tasting,hearing.

is there a seer who sees color or just seeing?

There is just seeing….even if each time I have to look, is not yet an immediate knowing.

Also, is there a clear boundary between seeing, hearing, tasting, etc?
Or just thought describes them as separate?
Can you separate the hearing from the seeing?

Hearing happens through my ears and seeing through my eyes, when I close my eyes there is no seeing, when I close my ears there is no hearing.
When my eyes and my ears are open all seeing and hearing happen together with no separation, it’s impossible to switch from one to the other.

Are there separate senses or just experiencing?

There is a global experience of hearing, seeing, touching, smelling.
I can see that the experience is one and not fragmented, it’s a full immersive experience.

Thank you Cheryl,
Good night ❤️
Lucia