1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
'Self', 'me', 'I', aren't there. No stable sense of ownership of anything that is happening anymore. There was the belief that there was, but never anything really.
2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, how it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.
The illusion of separate self is just a sense of control that the mind takes to be real. The mind claims ownership of what goes on in reality and says "I do this, I am doing that, this is what I am" and actually, reality does it all by itself. There's nothing for a separate self to actually do in reality because it is all taken care of. 'Self' is just an accepted superstition, like doing a ritual to make the sun rise or a rain dance. The illusion is just a confusion about what reality is. Its just a story of a person that is told, like a scaffolding built over reality.
3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.
Its a mix of surrealness, wonder, and peace. There is no more confusion. Things go by themselves, theres no going off the rails. There's forgetting sometimes, but remembering is fun. There's a sort of "oh shit it's real" moment that comes at times.
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?
When the thought came up "Am I in control?" and then something clicked. How does it know what it is referring to? Thought is just a thought, and there are words in them. The content has no meaning of itself. There is an intelligence but no owner of it, it does not own, and it is not "me".
5) Please talk about deciding, intending, choosing and control, describing the process as best you can. How do these things happen? Do you make them happen? Give examples from experience.
Deciding is just done, depending on what factors that are present in the situation things are done. Intending is not needed, intent seems like a flag the mind puts down to claim an action. Really here is no difference between intent -> action done and an action being done because the intent follows the same rules in arising as an action does. Choosing is also done based on factors, through learned preferences or situational benefit. All of these things add to a sense of control. In reality there is no control, it is superfluous to reality. There is nothing to control, it doesn't fit.
Reality does everything, it is the only thing acting and moving in a continuous chain of cause and effect that even the sense of control is a part of.
6) Anything to add?
Thank you for this gift. This is so cool, it changes everything. I don't know what to say it's so awesome. I don't think I understand or will ever, the magnitude of this. If you ever want to learn how to trade ForEx I will gladly give my time to teach you. Thank you Mark!
