Ready to let go. Requesting a guide.

[Tao]

Hi Gomi.

Glad to see your internet is working better now. Life with internet and without internet is a much different experience! :-)

It's very slow at certain times but will be changing providers soon. :)

Question 2

With an open mind

Is mind personal? Is there a controller of mind?

What was meant by open mind, is when LOOKING, mind is receptive, things are SEEN rather than assumed. In this way, direct experience happens. There is the appearance that one can LOOK. When looking, thoughts will assume 'I' am looking, but again they are just arising assumption thoughts.

It doesn't matter how accurate this assumption is, so long as the experience can be neatly filed away into familiar and known territory. The logic mind has to explain everything in order to feel safe. Nothing is allowed to be left as a mystery.

Please clarify. Are you refering to your description of labeling and categorizing the content of thought...which you say isn't real? What files these experiences away? The logic mind? Is it real?

Well, thoughts are real, the content is just an appearance. Perhaps 'filed away' wasn't the best description of what happens. Thoughts guess what every experience is. When a sound is heard, an image arises as to what the sound is. It doesn't matter how accurate the image is, but thoughts continue to label and place each experience.

There is thought that 'I' must be protected that creates worry.

A thought appears. Is this the same type of assumption you were talking about in question 2? Assumptions that add labels onto thought that then follow up into worry?

Yes. Although I don't understanding the adding labels onto thoughts thing. It is the content of thought that says there is something to worry about, and then that appears to cause the arising sensation of worry. When this thought is SEEN as a thought, even if the worry arises, the worry too is SEEN.

Feelings are allowed to be, rather than resisted.There is more of a letting go of control,

Please explain. If there is no controller, what, if anything, is controlling/letting go of what?

Well, further thoughts arise, that realize there is no need to control. Also, there is non-reaction which is happening more and more. A WILL to just let things be.

Benny

[Gomi]

Dear Benny,

Thank you for the clarification. Since this is the weekend, i will give you the rest of the questions. If you have time, feel free to do them. If not, take it one question at a time.

*+*Please go into DE as you answer the questions. Let the aliveness in DE speak your answers.
LOOK for the answers, let them reveal itself...not the mind. *+*

4)What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

5)Do you decide, intend, choose, control events in Life? Do you make anything happen? Give examples from your experience.

6) Anything to add?

Love,
g

[Tao]

Hi Gomi,

4)What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

An answer for this couldn't be found. It is clear that a process is unfolding all of it's own accord. Control is an appearance. On one hand, there is suffering, and suffering leads to dissatisfaction, and dissatisfaction causes one to 'LOOK'. Dissatisfaction as 'me' causes 'me' to look.

On the other hand, there never was any control. If a proud thought arises, there is a strong knowing that 'I' can't take credit for anything. It is seen to be much bigger than 'me'.

Benny

[Gomi]

Hi there!

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

"An answer for this couldn't be found. It is clear that a process is unfolding all of it's own accord. Control is an appearance. On one hand, there is suffering, and suffering leads to dissatisfaction, and dissatisfaction causes one to 'LOOK'. Dissatisfaction as 'me' causes 'me' to look.
On the other hand, there never was any control. If a proud thought arises, there is a strong knowing that 'I' can't take credit for anything. It is seen to be much bigger than 'me'."

Just looking at your wording...Are you saying that SEEing the illusion was so gradual that you didn't notice a specific time that it occurred? Or... could it be that while you clearly see the process going on, you aren't sure if you have SEEn thru the illusion of self yet?

You started to touch on 'control', in question 5. Anything further you would like to add? Can you describe your experiences of this? Please do not respond thru the mind, but thru actual DE.

5) Do you decide, intend, choose, control events in Life? Do you make anything happen? Give examples from your experience.

6) Anything to add?

Love,
Gomi

[Tao]

Hi Gomi, :)

Just looking at your wording...Are you saying that SEEing the illusion was so gradual that you didn't notice a specific time that it occurred? Or... could it be that while you clearly see the process going on, you aren't sure if you have SEEn thru the illusion of self yet?

Well, seeing through the illusion has been gradual, it's possible it had already been seen through a year or two ago, but this process has really refined the 'looking'. I can't find a fixed point in which it can be said, 'now it has been seen'. There were flashes of insight a couple of years ago in which the concept of a FIXED self was CLEARLY seen through. An ever changing, ever flowing, continual process of rebirth, so to speak.

And there has been insight during this process. It is clear that 'I' cannot take credit for anything, because there is no 'I' that ever had any control. Thoughts dart around all experience, and create an appearance. There is no control over thoughts.

5) Do you decide, intend, choose, control events in Life? Do you make anything happen? Give examples from your experience.

What can be controlled, really? Everything arises of it's own arising; thoughts, feelings, light, sound, body movements.

Thoughts create an appearance that there is an 'I' that has control, but there is nothing that controls the thoughts, and the 'I' only exists in the content of thought, as an appearance/illusion.

6) Anything to add?

Heavy conditioning still plays out, and 'Benny' still gets lived. 'Benny' still has to LOOK. But when looking, no Benny can be found.

Will come back to this more tomorrow.

Benny :)

[moondog]

Hi Roni,

Well, that all looks good. You've answered my queries and doubts and seem to be seeing through the illusion more and more deeply.

So, let's now move on a little from doing to deciding/choosing (although the border between these is, to say the least, a little hazy). Try this exercise:

Raise your right arm (or don’t). In that process of raising the right arm (or not), a decision is made, or at least something happens (or doesn’t). But can you pinpoint the actual moment of choice and find the actual entity that appears to be making that choice? In direct experience, can that moment of choice, that apparent chooser, actually be found? Or does the idea “i just chose to (not) raise my right arm” come after the event itself?

Also, can I ask you to have a look at the following short video clip from BBC Horizon - The Secret You on Neuroscience and Freewill: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-i3AiOS4nCE . It demonstrates scientifically that our decisions and choices are made a full 6 seconds before we think we make them, i.e. before a thought arises saying, "I decided to do this." There is no substitute for looking in direct experience, but this is excellent scientific corroboration for what is to be found, or rather not found, in direct experience.

P x

[moondog]

Sorry, wrong thread.

Pete x

[Gomi]

Hi Benny,

Was wondering where 'you' went. Looking for Benny but 'he' disappeared. Funny. :-)

The responses look pretty good over here. Very nice! Would have started the confirmation process but won't do it till you let me know you have completed your responses.

Loving,
Gomi

[Gomi]

PS: While you are answering, can you further clarify :

*Have you seen? Yes or no?
*Do you have any doubt that 'you' have seen through the illusion that you 'are' or 'have' a separate self??
*Are you satisfied? Is there anything that you were expecting to happen when you saw thru the illusion that hasn't happened?

Thanks :-)
g

[Tao]

Hi Gomi, apologies for late reply. More time was needed.

PS: While you are answering, can you further clarify :

*Have you seen? Yes or no?
*Do you have any doubt that 'you' have seen through the illusion that you 'are' or 'have' a separate self??
*Are you satisfied? Is there anything that you were expecting to happen when you saw thru the illusion that hasn't happened?

Thanks :-)
g

Well, there hasn't been any kind of landmark point. Just an ongoing process, that is still going on. Your guidance has been fantastic, and insight has arisen as a result. There is still a strong desire for freedom, liberation. At the beginning, 'I' was expecting liberation, perhaps an 'overcoming', or complete seeing through of conditioning. Yet conditioning is still strong and 'Benny' is still believed a lot of the time.

Things are not all that different. 'I' am still watching the cinema screen, and getting absorbed, engrossed, in it most of the time.

Has it been seen that 'Benny' is an illusion? Yes. And when LOOKing, Benny is not there, just arising thoughts, feelings, conditionings, sense impressions. - a unity of experience.

Do 'I' have any doubt that I have seen through the illusion? There is still a lot to unfold. I don't know at which point it can be said, 'I' passed through the gate, so how can I be sure? Has it been SEEN that there is nothing but direct experience? Yes. Has it been SEEN that 'Benny' is an illusion that arises in experience? Yes.

So it's for you to decide! :D

Benny

[Gomi]

OK, hon. Looks good here. i'll now submit them to the guides for any further comments or questions.
I'll get back to you when i've heard from them.
Much love,
Gomi

[Gomi]

Hi precious,

What's the expression "Life is Good"? It is with great love and support that guides are here as a stand for one's SEEing. In bringing your postings up for questions there have been some wonderful pointers offered. It has been suggested that we continue investigating to deepen SEEing. Let's continue. Let's bravely go forth! :-) There is joy for this one to see manifestation appearing as 'me' in the form of 'Benny'. (And when there is frustration, i LOOK to What Is! ...smiling...joking with ya-with honesty.)

(Know that i will be going on vacation from 9/5-22. During that time, vince can continue with you, if that is OK.)

Are ya ready?

First...let's address any stories that might have come up regarding continued looking. Are there any?

One of the guides suggested you might re-look at the way you incorporate Direct Experience into life-ing. Do you think you can turn it off and on? Do you realize that it is always ON? That all that needs to happen is notice. Its simple! Just notice!!!

REALLY, REALLY take this in!!! Just LOOK. (My story is "This is really big fine tuning!!!" A potent antidote to conditioning!!!)

Please share your Direct Experience about this pointer as you go throughout the day. What do you SEE? Notice?

Much love,
Gomi

[Tao]

Fantastic! Will get back to you tomorrow.

[Tao]

Hi precious,

What's the expression "Life is Good"? It is with great love and support that guides are here as a stand for one's SEEing. In bringing your postings up for questions there have been some wonderful pointers offered. It has been suggested that we continue investigating to deepen SEEing. Let's continue. Let's bravely go forth! :-) There is joy for this one to see manifestation appearing as 'me' in the form of 'Benny'. (And when there is frustration, i LOOK to What Is! ...smiling...joking with ya-with honesty.)

Hi Gomi, joy arose upon reading this. Happy the process is continuing, and very grateful for your ongoing support and enthusiasm :)

(Know that i will be going on vacation from 9/5-22. During that time, vince can continue with you, if that is OK.)

Yes great!

First...let's address any stories that might have come up regarding continued looking. Are there any?

One of the guides suggested you might re-look at the way you incorporate Direct Experience into life-ing. Do you think you can turn it off and on? Do you realize that it is always ON? That all that needs to happen is notice. Its simple! Just notice!!!

REALLY, REALLY take this in!!! Just LOOK. (My story is "This is really big fine tuning!!!" A potent antidote to conditioning!!!)

Please share your Direct Experience about this pointer as you go throughout the day. What do you SEE? Notice?

The same as usual. Feelings, thoughts, stories. Along with NOWness, a sense of being. I'm not sure what it is that is always on. Awareness isn't always on. LOOKing takes concentration and motivation, at least it appears to. When there is little motivation or concentration, story-fying happens and there is loss of 'noticing'.

Fine tuning 'looking' is definitely what is needed.

Benny

[Gomi]

Dear Benny,

Hi Gomi, joy arose upon reading this. Happy the process is continuing, and very grateful for your ongoing support and enthusiasm :)

So it's for you to decide! :D

(This is how you ended your post regarding the questions.)

While your comments are sweet: Are 'you' looking to "Man whose breathe is in his nostrils"? (Ha! A bible quote...and it isn't even from the religion i was born into.) Have you found that looking to others only strengthens a sense of the illusory self, which then leads to cravings and suffering?

Deconstructing the conditionings will still continue via SEEing. Please explain What experiences the happiness in the continuing?

~*~Looking to RAW EXPERIENCing is just what is so. It's All That Is!!!

I'm not sure what it is that is always on.

Here's a pointer:

What is happening now, right now, this moment? That includes awareness of thinking and thought content too. (Watch the ease of default experiencing.) We are looking at raw experience. Period. Using this pointer, please write about the next 24 hours.

Love,
Gomi