Giving another shot, looking for a guide

[clearskye]

I'm not sure the emptying ever finishes--unlearning, unlearning, and more unlearning. It becomes the flow of life--an illusory thought or belief comes up, it is seen through and released, because as you say, it is no longer believed in.

I have six questions to ask you, Filip. Please respond from your direct experience rather than the mind:

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

With love,
Skye

[filipek]

hi, can i change my mind? :D could we look at a few things before verification? so what people say from their experience is that you should look for the thing that is not changing, ever. from my expperience, everything is changing. maybe the fact of constant-shifting of life is not changing?
thanks for help

[clearskye]

Of course! I just got home very, very late--I'll try to respond tomorrow...
with love,
Skye
PS (and I don't just go away after you answer the final questions... I remain available to you, and there are "aftercare" facebook groups you'll be invited to...)

[filipek]

Ah what the hell, let's do verifications and see what comes up.

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
no there isn't and there never was ;) do you want me to elaborate a bit more? maybe i will just wait for questions that askme to elaborate more?


I'm now letting go of attachments to thoughts of losing "it". search became big part of my life over the years so it's not that easy to let it go :D By the way i'dlike to share with you a big insight that came few days ago ;) I've noticed that in my case identification was with very dense thought-energy. So dense that it appears to be solid. It's conditioned to impersonate a person. So it's requires deep looking to see that however dense, heavy, tight it felt, it is never solid(solid in this way is really a mental construct, nothing in universe can be really "solid"). So it can be given space just to be, and not a fight :D the doubt that keeps appearing that i don't really know what changed. Is it just themind recognizing the awareness and seeing that it can relax, because it's all not that serious? i don't understand this shift at all :D therefore there are thoughts that beliveing the illusion may come back.

[clearskye]

Nice, Filip, your work with thoughts.
Yes, please do elaborate on question one.
with love,
Skye

[clearskye]

Filip, are you there?
with love,
Skye

[filipek]

hi, sorry i lost internet connection for a while. also i started being not sure about if ego was seen through or not. i think i'm pretty sure now. i have a question: lots of bad dreams i was living are seen now and it's not a nice experience to see all this illusions and suffering. this dream of ME has so many aspects and manifestations. the amount of badtrips i've accumulated over the years is pretty overwhelming right now. Do i need to go into those old dreams to be free from them?

[clearskye]

Hi Filip,
Sorry, had a very busy weekend.

I assume you mean life patterns, and not dreaming nightmares?

Sometimes we need to go into those old dreams simply to truly feel them--at a body sensation level--dropping the story (the labels), and do this repeatedly, before they dissolve. But here's the challenge--we need to wholly welcome them. We need to be willing for them to be with us for eternity. Desiring to be free of them means that we believe that they have reality.

Other times, just seeing through them is enough.

Does this make sense?

With love,
Skye

[filipek]

thnk that was very helpful! i am going on vacation now, i will keep looking ;)) i will be back around 15th or 30th - im not sure. thank you for your support ;)))

[clearskye]

happy vacation! Be in touch when you are back home.
with love,
Skye

[filipek]

hi, im back, sorry to dissapear like this ;) i think im ready to be verified. few things that happened:

so i hd many expectations for the experience. for a long time there was still an identification with body feelings. I got out of this by asking myself: is this(feelign thought, whatever) , or is it being experienced? very powerful question! so for quite some time i couldnt find any i. but than i started to look for something that doesnt change, silence, peace etc. but i was still trying to find the emptiness as something solid. right now there are maaaany reactions, thoughts about the I, patterns, but in the middle of that it's pretty obvious that there is no I. There are still some thoughts about it being a passing state, so maybe forgetting will happen again. But this time it is not a state. There were many peaceful states before that i thought were IT and they were passing. So i had expectations about IT being some state. Right now i dont feel any different, i dont have superpowers, im not more peacufl than usually, but i can see that there is no i. i dont even think meditation got any easier ! :D Im thinking of starting meditation on daily basis to really bring out more presence in daily life. So i dont know if it is it. when i am to accept that it is it there is dissapintment but also relief that seeking can stop. tell me how does it look! again sorry for not replying daily and really taking my time :D

Hugs!

[clearskye]

Hi Filip,
So happy you are back! I will email you later, probably today or tomorrow. I have to go paint outside right now while the weather is warm.
with love,
Skye

[clearskye]

Hi Filip,
Yes, we all have expectations that we finally must set down. We hold our patterning deep in our body, and it seems so REAL!
You discovered the something that doesn't change. Presence. Always here.

As for meditation, I recommend simply sitting and noticing.

First confirmation question:
1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

with love,
Skye

[filipek]

thank you for the reply!

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No there is not. There are just images, thoughts, concepts. But they are very untested. It's really hard to write something else for this yes/no question... how should i write anything about something that is not real? well, there is just observation happening (of thoughts, feeling, sensory ones). And thoughts are labeling the observation as if they were the observer. and as if the body was the feeler. but it's not true ;) tried my best to elaborate a bit longer than "no", please ask something more direct if you would like me to elaborate more.

HUGS!!!!!

[filipek]

Just one more observation. seeing that i am the space in which things are happening, the presence, hovewer you call it - is not really that obvious. it's more like sometimes noticing that it is this way. from that it is very clear and simple, but in my experience, seeing yourself as spaciousness seems like a passing experience. hovewer it's sooo obvious that there is no separate self, and there never was. but there is no knowing who i am, there is just knowing that im not any certain form that arises. to sum up- knowing that there is no self seems to be available at all times now (but it may pass, who knows?), but seeing that my true nature is the space appears like state of mind (hovewer there is knowwing its not a state when it's here). am i through or do i need more guidance?

love ya
filip