Looking for a guide

[clearskye]

Yes, Jaya, that is why the truth is overlooked...
with love,
Skye

[Jaya]

Dear Skye,
what to say... this beingness is still there, amasing!!! but a knowing that in many ways this is just the beginning!?! .... a relief of being with bare experience and a relief that constant labelling has currently subsided!!! has our journey together ended?
love jaya

[clearskye]

No, it has not... how could it? But I wonder if you feel ready for some questions? There are six of them. When you answer them, I'll share them with the elder guides who review my guiding--since I'm fairly new to this--and they may have another question or two for clarification. Then at some point, when folks are satisfied, you'll be invited to some closed Facebook aftercare groups. As you said above, this IS just the beginning. Unlearning never stops.
with love,
Skye

[Jaya]

:-) ready
Love jaya

[clearskye]

Okay! When you answer these, each time, check in with your direct experience right now.

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

with love,
Amrita

[Jaya]

Hi,

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

looking into direct experience no there is no entity of self, me or I. There can be a labelling of experience into 'I' but that is not in current experience and is just be a habit. The mind is a labelling device, there is nothing that could be a separate self!
love jaya

[Jaya]

Dear Skye,
wanted to communicate with you. Hope you are well. Still feeling a lot of spaciousness in the body. This does feel like just a beginning! but of what dont know. In the busyness of work when I tune back into my direct experience there is current real spaciousness in the body! was trying to describe to my mum this lack of reference back to myself but to little avail, feels so subtle in many ways that the label of self has gone currently, there is not an appropriating of sound, and much less mental labeling, really trying to just enjoy and dwell in the spaciousness!

There is 'beingness' which is all the words one can use currently. Still not much clearer on awareness or consciousness. Aware of a desire to feel deeply connect to everything but actually there is currently just a peace and 'beingness'. Do you experience a sense of deep connectedness to all things? so maybe this is why it's just the beginning.

There is the sense that I know less and less, but funnily that feels fine :-)
love jaya

[clearskye]

love the less and less.
too tired tonight. bought a house today.

[Jaya]

Oh great news!! felt a lot of can only describe it as 'joy' today.
take good care jaya

[clearskye]

Hi Jaya,
next question:
2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

with love,
Skye

[Jaya]

Dear Skye,

full day today!! here goes

Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

So last night I thought a sense of self had come back!! but when I looked at my direct experience it was thought and it vanished and spaciousness returned!! hurray. So the sense is.. often there is sensation in the body in the chest, thought arises this is labelled and a sense of self or 'i' having a certain experience comes in. There is a sense of memory or future planning (in the mind) which is then brought to life by a sense of 'me' beliefs that 'I' will have a certain experience. Currently though if there is just direct experience then there is sensation and thought but the loop of imaginary self/selfing just doesnt take place!! amasing. Lost in thought a sense of 'me', mine takes place the practice of direct looking or experience frees one of that. Currently when thought arises and future imagining starts to take place it seems easy to stop, thought it just thought what is real is currently what is taking place in direct experience and there is no 'self' that needs to be tagged or added into the experience because it is just fine as it is.

The example that came to mind was facebook, sometimes one is tagged in photos and (analogy doesnt quite work) but there is this sense of self, but when you untag yourself there is not nothing but awareness or consciousness which is different to the tagged name on the picture. So currently if feels that it is 'discursive thought which result in this sense of self appearing!?! Everything is fine without the tagging of the illusory self, Not sure if this is enough detail but currently there is spaciousness and being and the simplicity of not needing to add something in.

bye for now, love jaya

[clearskye]

Beautiful!
Next question:
3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.
with love,
Skye

[Jaya]

Dear Skye,

so feeling very open in the body for last few days!! aware of less fear and anxiety which might be due to not having a sense of needing to 'protect me'. Feeling very whole in a funny way, if that makes sense with spaciousness and openness!?! Noticed with break-up some subtle tension would build up if I had not been in some contact for few days but this is not the case now!! beingness is cool!!

I think there is more happiness in a funny way, less caught in things, haven't felt overwhelmed (which i would have done seeing a friend in a lot of physical pain)! felt joy and also slightly 'spaced out' :-) mind more peaceful overall and much less constant labelling, some curiosity has faded away more clarity is what I feel. Oh yes and not the 'labelling' of me into every single experience!! Starting to trust more of a 'knowing' and that things will just happen.
love jaya

[clearskye]

Yes, Jaya, isn't that wonderful. Trust will build.
next question:
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?
with love,
Skye

[Jaya]

Dear Skye,
i cannot fully express my gratitude to you! anyway here goes

What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

that is quite hard to answer, i felt that it was not going to happen, something you said about not fixing that I think really helped, maybe your faith helped.
Having a conversation with a friend that evening on emptiness, i am not sure i can say i guess maybe not trying and stopping pushing, giving up (but not really if you know what i mean)!?! maybe a deeper relaxation allowed it to unfold, I think that i thought it would be different a big bang maybe. stopping believing in thought maybe. stopped looking in the wrong place maybe ;-)

love jaya