Ready to see the Self for what it is

[dreamer]

Exactly doubts are thought stories!

I can't tell for sure, I don't know, I can't do this

All thought stories!

When you look please look through those stories.


Is it your body or a body? Are sensations felt in body? Do you experience a body at all?

Greetings Vivi

[Enough]

Is it your body or a body?

there's just the felt sensations, and unclear images that come up. the label "body" or "mine" sometimes comes up afterwards.

Are sensations felt in body?

there are felt sensations, saying they're in the body is a thought added afterwards.

Do you experience a body at all?

There's the felt sensations. The "body" is experienced when it comes up as a word thought in response to looking for the body. the thought says "is this the body?" in response to the felt sensation / image that comes up.

Thanks,

Michael

[dreamer]

Thanks Michael!

What happens when decisions is made? Any I in making decisions? Is it your decision or a decision?

Greetings Vivi

[Enough]

What happens when decisions is made?

Tried this with contracting and relaxing a leg. It just happens. There's a brief sensation of choice/intention, followed quickly by the sensation of tightness/flexing.

Any I in making decisions?

The only time an "I" showed up was afterwards with a thought "I did this". An "I" didn't make the decision.

Is it your decision or a decision?

There's just the decision. The "me" that it's thought to belong to isn't an actual part of the decision-making process.

Thanks Vivi,

Michael

[dreamer]

Hi Michael

Yes.

Please write all the expectations you can find on how it would be to fully see there is no I.
Also explain what you mean by knowing it intellectual.

Greetings Vivi

[Enough]

Please write all the expectations you can find on how it would be to fully see there is no I.

Alright, here it goes!

I expect that the sense of a personal self will totally vanish. It doesn't have to be seen through, it's just not there. Nothing that happens in the world will be resisted, everything is just in a state of pure flow. I won't feel at all self-conscious about what other people think about me, or how I appear as I go through life. Time will be seen as a complete illusion, and I'll gain a much deeper perspective of my "now" experience. It'll be a huge relief. Nothing will seem like a big deal, and I'll be imperturbable. I won't feel fear as a result of being attached to an outcome. I'll be a lot happier, freer, and more peaceful. I won't perceive any difference in identity between what's "me", and the rest of the world.

Also explain what you mean by knowing it intellectual.

Paradoxically, "I" believe in the concept of no-self. I've had a few experiences where I've seen through the self, and it felt complete, but the sense of it all being personal came back. I still am self-conscious and think a lot about how I appear to my friends and the rest of the world. It's this state of conflicting beliefs, because as I write all of this and reflect on the word "I", I think... "Wait, that's not real! I who?" But it still comes up. I interact with all of my friends as if there's still an "I" in here. But, when asked to look at present experience, I can only find the sense of it being personal. There are lots of thought stories.

Thanks,

Michael

[dreamer]

Hi Michael

Good!

I expect that the sense of a personal self will totally vanish.
It doesn't have to be seen through, it's just not there.
Nothing that happens in the world will be resisted, everything is just in a state of pure flow.
I won't feel at all self-conscious about what other people think about me, or how I appear as I go through life.
Time will be seen as a complete illusion, and I'll gain a much deeper perspective of my "now" experience.
It'll be a huge relief. Nothing will seem like a big deal, and I'll be imperturbable.
I won't feel fear as a result of being attached to an outcome.
I'll be a lot happier, freer, and more peaceful.
I won't perceive any difference in identity between what's "me", and the rest of the world.

Now look into these expectations, which of them is based in thoughts about life having to be different from what it is. Which of these are based in thoughts of 'I'. What about the rest of the expectations what are they based in?

greetings Vivi

[Enough]

I expect that the sense of a personal self will totally vanish.
It doesn't have to be seen through, it's just not there.
Nothing that happens in the world will be resisted, everything is just in a state of pure flow.
I won't feel at all self-conscious about what other people think about me, or how I appear as I go through life.
Time will be seen as a complete illusion, and I'll gain a much deeper perspective of my "now" experience.
It'll be a huge relief. Nothing will seem like a big deal, and I'll be imperturbable.
I won't feel fear as a result of being attached to an outcome.
I'll be a lot happier, freer, and more peaceful.
I won't perceive any difference in identity between what's "me", and the rest of the world.

Now look into these expectations, which of them is based in thoughts about life having to be different from what it is.

Okay, the sense of a personal self totally vanishing is part of this. It's not quite as strong as it used to be, but it's still there. Like a cloud.

Which of these are based in thoughts of 'I'.

"I won't feel at all self-conscious about what other people think about me, or how I appear as I go through life."

"I'll gain a much deeper perspective of my "now" experience."

"I'll be imperturbable."

"I won't feel fear as a result of being attached to an outcome."

"I'll be a lot happier, freer, and more peaceful."

"I won't perceive any difference in identity between what's "me" and the rest of the word."

...Whew. Lots of them! Those are all based on thoughts of there being an "I" who has something to gain from all of this.

What about the rest of the expectations what are they based in?

"Nothing that happens will be resisted, everything is just in a state of pure flow." -- this is based on an idea. Points to a different, imagined point of time other than what's happening now.

"Time will be seen as a complete illusion, and I'll gain a much deeper perspective of my "now" experience." again, based on an idea of a future where "time will be seen as a complete illusion."

"It'll be a huge relief. Nothing will seem like a big deal" -- same thing. An idea in my head of the way it "should" be.

Thanks Vivi!

Michael

[dreamer]

Hi Michael

Yes. It can never be other than it is this instant :)

This is it.

What happens when reading that?

Greetings Vivi

[Enough]

Yes. It can never be other than it is this instant :)

This is it.

What happens when reading that?

Mind came in, "yes, but so what?"

Now just a jumble of thoughts about how to answer this question. But the jumble of thoughts about how to answer the question are actually creating the answer... which led to this answer arising. So nothing except the mind coming up with this non-answer answer.

[dreamer]

Fine

Do you feel ready to answer what is called the final questions?

Greetings Vivi

[Enough]

Do you feel ready to answer what is called the final questions?

First thing that happened in response to this question was the thought, "I'm not ready." and uncomfortable sensations. Like looking at expectations though, that was just based in an idea of there being an "I" and an idea of "what it should be like" to see this. If you think I'm ready to answer them, I'd be glad to give it a shot.

Thanks,

Michael

[dreamer]

Hi Michael

I don't think anything :)

Let's look at this, what is the feeling 'uncomfortable' about? Look into it in direct experience.

Greetings Vivi

[Enough]

I don't think anything :)

Haha

Let's look at this, what is the feeling 'uncomfortable' about? Look into it in direct experience.

In response to your question about the final questions, it co-arises with the thought "I can't do it." It comes up as an uneasiness/constriction in what's perceived as the stomach area. As I observe it, it opens up and dissolves.

Thanks,

Michael

[dreamer]

Fine

Are you ready to answer the final questions

greetings Vivi