What am i?

[Noro]

Hello,

Thanks for responding so quickly! :)

I actually don’t know. I feel different when I lie, but I can’t really describe the feeling clearly. It’s weird.

That's already a good start. The wording of the last exercise can be a bit misleading. Truth vs. Lie are strong words.
Another way to look at it is to think about how you feel when you experience something that evokes a feeling of being in resonance/harmony/integrity within you, say when you read or hear about an act of caring or generosity and there is a sense of "this feels right." Versus something that evokes a feeling of disharmony within you, "this feels wrong." Bring your attention into the sensations in your body... solar plexus or chest area. It is not necessary to justify why you feel like that, simply notice the feelings as they arise.

I think it would be worth having another go at this. Perhaps you could choose two contrasting situations, one where you know you will feel in harmony and at ease with, i.e. someone you love and another where you know you will feel in disharmony.
That feeling of freedom that you felt in the last exercise corresponds to "this feels right."

Please let me know how you get on.


LABEL- REALITY CORRELATION: GREEN-RED

There is a belief that labels have a one-to-one correspondence with reality, (i.e. direct experience). But they don't necessarily. Just like it is a generally accepted belief that labels like ‘good’ and ‘bad’ are inherent characteristics of ‘things’. But actually, they are not.

When you look at the word label GREEN, what is the actual experience?
Is the color red experienced, or is the color green experienced as the label suggests?

Does the label GREEN have a one-to-one correspondence with ‘reality’?
Or does the label suggest something else other than what is here now (red colour)?

Is 'green' associated in any way with the experience of the colour red; or is green just a label that overlays the actual experience of red?

If the label GREEN is replaced with the label GOOD or BAD , is the 'redness' affected in any way as the labels suggests?

Does redness become ‘good’ or ‘bad’? Do the labels have an actual effect on the ‘reality’ of what is seen?

Let me know what is actually SEEN?

Are you clear that there is nothing green there to experience?

All we are doing is noticing that the words/labels are not the things themselves - never have been and never will be. Are you clear about that?


Warmly,

Rowena

[Idk]

Hi, Rowena

Does redness become ‘good’ or ‘bad’? Do the labels have an actual effect on the ‘reality’ of what is seen?

Yeah, it’s pretty clear. But still, when I read the word “green,” associations with the color green immediately pop into my head. Makes me wonder where those associations even come from.

[Noro]

Hello,

Yeah, it’s pretty clear. But still, when I read the word “green,” associations with the color green immediately pop into my head. Makes me wonder where those associations even come from.

Glad it's clear and don't worry about the associations!




VISUAL FIELD

Take a few relaxed breaths to let the dust settle for a while, and:

Look to your right.
Then look to your left.
Finally, bring your head back to centre, CLOSE YOUR EYES and look forward.

Okay, so when you look to the right, the view (visual experience) on the right is seen (whatever that is).

When you look to the left, the view on the left is seen (whatever that is).

And then, when you look in front of you with eyes closed, the visual experience in front is seen.

So, when the view on the right is seen, do you have the ‘choice’ to see or not to see? Y/N

I’m not asking can you ‘choose’ to see something else like another view or ‘blank space’ if you close your eyes.
The question is:

Can you turn seeing off? Y/N
Can you NOT see what is seen? Y/N

Same thing when you are facing to your left, can there be a choice to NOT see the view on the left? Y/N
Same thing when you are facing forward with closed eyes, can you NOT see the what is seen? Y/N

Is there an independent self or 'doer' that can choose to turn seeing off or on? Y/N

Warmly,

Rowena

[Idk]

Hi, Rowena
No, there is no doer that can turn off/on the vision. You cant choose not to see what youre already seeing

[Noro]

Hi there,

CUP EXERCISE - TWO TYPES OF THOUGHTS
Here is an exercise which points out the difference between direct experience and content of thought.

There are two types of thoughts: a thought label "Here is a cup", and a mental (visual) image of a 'cup'.

So I invite you to do this exercise:
Think of a cup, get a very clear picture in your mind. See clearly the size, shape, colour and volume of the cup. Notice whether it is decorated or plain. Notice whether it has a handle. Notice whether it is heavy or fragile. 
Do you have a clear picture in mind?

Now, can you physically grasp or touch that image of a cup?
Can you pour tea into it?
Can you drink from it?

Is there a "real' cup or just an image of a cup?
Is there an appearing mental image?
Is the content of the mental image (the cup) 'real'?

The thoughts and mental images are real only as arising thoughts and mental images,
their 'presence' cannot be denied. However the contents, what the thoughts are about, are not 'real', they are interpretations overlaid onto the direct experience.
Can you see this?

Now try the same exercise with a bar of chocolate or something you know will bring a body response when thinking about it.
Can you physically grasp or touch that image of a bar of chocolate?

Now imagine yourself eating a piece of chocolate?
Are either of the above two imaginings more 'real' than the other?
Was there a body response to one or both of the two imaginings?
If yes, let go of the mental image and bring your full attention to be with the body sensations for a while.
Let them be, just as they are....simply sensations.

Let me know how you got on.

Warmly,

Rowena

[Idk]

Hi, Rowena
The website was down yesterday for some reason, so I’m writing to you today.
In my experience, I can see both the cup and the chocolate bar. I can even taste the chocolate, and for a moment I just drift into my thoughts. But yeah, I get what you mean, thoughts are only real as thoughts, but in reality the cup I’m imagining doesn’t exist, but the thought containing the image of that cup does exist

[Noro]

Hello,

From now on, please could you answer each question individually. For example:

Now, can you physically grasp or touch that image of a cup? Yes/No?

Can you pour tea into it? Yes/No

Can you drink from it? Yes/No

In my experience, I can see both the cup and the chocolate bar. I can even taste the chocolate, and for a moment I just drift into my thoughts. But yeah, I get what you mean, thoughts are only real as thoughts, but in reality the cup I’m imagining doesn’t exist, but the thought containing the image of that cup does exist.

The above is an intellectual interpretation of your direct experience. It is important to get very clear with language. We can use the above style of language for communication in everyday 'consensus reality.' This is not the same as looking in direct experience.

Think of a cup, get a very clear picture in your mind. See clearly the size, shape, colour and volume of the cup. Notice whether it is decorated or plain. Notice whether it has a handle. Notice whether it is heavy or fragile. 
Do you have a clear picture in mind?

Can you actually SEE the cup/chocolate bar? How do you SEE when you are thinking of a cup/chocolate bar?
SEEING relates ONLY to Visual Experience.

Can you actually taste the chocolate bar? Yes/No?
Are you clear on this?

Please could you re-do the cup exercise keeping strictly to your direct experience as per the guidelines below:

DIRECT OR ACTUAL EXPERIENCE IS
Seeing (colors)
Hearing (sounds)
Feeling or Sensing (sensations)
Tasting
Smelling
and
Thinking (thoughts, but not their content)


OBSERVING THOUGHTS

The Direct experience of thought is also very important in the seeing through the self illusion. Take your time and really work through this exercise, if you like, it can be helpful to get a piece of paper and write it as it comes and in the flow of questioning and looking, clarity comes. Please answer each question in blue individually.

Sit quietly for about 15 minutes and notice any thoughts arising.
Just let them appear as and when they appear. Try your best to COMPLETELY ignore what they are saying and just notice how they appear without you doing anything at all.

Where are thoughts coming from and going to?

Did you do anything to make a particular thought or thoughts appear?

Could you have done anything to make a different thought appear at that exact moment instead?

Can you predict your next thought?

Can you select from a range of thoughts to have only pleasant thoughts?

Can you choose not to have painful, negative, or fearful thoughts?

Can you pick and choose any kind of thought?

Is it possible to prevent a thought from appearing?

What is a thought made of?

What can a thought do i.e. does it have agency?

Can a thought think another thought?

Can you find an "I" without a thought that says "I"?

Please answer ALL the questions, using the "quote' function with each question, so that it is easy to follow.
Look as many times as it is possible during the day even for a few seconds.

Warmly,

Rowena

[Idk]

Hi, Rowena

Now, can you physically grasp or touch that image of a cup? Yes/No?

No

Can you pour tea into it? Yes/No

No

Can you drink from it? Yes/No

No

Can you actually SEE the cup/chocolate bar?

Im sure i cant

Can you actually taste the chocolate bar? Yes/No?

No

Are you clear on this?

Yes, i think so

Where are thoughts coming from and going to?

I can’t specifically say where they come from or where they go.They just appear out of nowhere and disappear into nowhere. I don’t really see a clear answer.

Did you do anything to make a particular thought or thoughts appear?

No

Could you have done anything to make a different thought appear at that exact moment instead?

I tried ignoring the context in which thoughts arise, and I noticed that they simply appear. There doesn’t seem to be an “I want” or “I can do something about this.” It feels more like chance. Each thought appears simply because the conditions for it happened to be there. You can’t really predict which thought will come, nor replace one with another, because the thought that says “this thought should be replaced” is itself just another thought. It, too, simply appears and disappears.

Can you predict your next thought?

No

Can you select from a range of thoughts to have only pleasant thoughts?

It seems to me that I can’t do it myself, but if thoughts continue to develop in that direction, then thoughts like that will probably start appearing more often.

Can you choose not to have painful, negative, or fearful thoughts?

I myself can’t do it

Can you pick and choose any kind of thought?

No

Is it possible to prevent a thought from appearing?

I don’t know

What is a thought made of?

It’s a difficult question, i still don’t understand. But here’s the answer I have so far: it seems like it’s just information.

What can a thought do i.e. does it have agency?

I really don’t know

Can a thought think another thought?

No, they just appear. Its like magic (joking)

Can you find an "I'" without a thought that says "I"?

I feel like the answer is no, but i still don’t know what it would be like without thoughts. More precisely, i don’t remember, and i can’t directly experience it right now, so i can’t answer from direct experience. But from what i know, I can’t.

[Noro]

Hello,

Good, your responses are much clearer when answered directly, but there is still analyzing / intellectualizing going on.
Direct experience invites a Yes/No answer or little more (remember the Colored Socks exercise?)

Can you select from a range of thoughts to have only pleasant thoughts?

It seems to me that I can’t do it myself, but if thoughts continue to develop in that direction, then thoughts like that will probably start appearing more often.

When you look again, in your direct experience, can a 'you' be found anywhere other than as a thought "I" or "Me"?

Can you choose not to have painful, negative, or fearful thoughts?

I myself can’t do it

Can an "I myself" be found anywhere other than a thought or a belief?

What is a thought made of?

It’s a difficult question, i still don’t understand. But here’s the answer I have so far: it seems like it’s just information.

That is a bit of a trick question.... It is OK not to know!!

Can an "I" be found that can understand or not understand?

What is information made of other than thought?

Can a thought think another thought?

No, they just appear. Its like magic (joking)

YES! :)

Can you find an "I'" without a thought that says "I"?

I feel like the answer is no, but i still don’t know what it would be like without thoughts. More precisely, i don’t remember, and i can’t directly experience it right now, so i can’t answer from direct experience. But from what i know, I can’t.

You actually gave the answer ("I can't directly experience it right now").

Can you see how easy it is to revert to habit and answer intellectually.

Let me rephrase the question:
Can an "I" be found that is not a thought?




SECOND CUP EXERCISE
Take a cup and place it in front of you.
Start looking at it and notice any thoughts labelling what you see.
Consider the process of Looking.
Now consider the process of Seeing.
Watch thoughts as you consider a 'seer'.
Notice what happens to Seeing as you consider a 'seer'. What changes?
Go back to watching thoughts as you continue to look at the cup.
After a while of watching thoughts, the thoughts will get bored and slow down.
Now look for spaces between thoughts.
Focus fully on seeing in the spaces between thoughts.
Without the labels there is simply seeing.
Colors, textures, shapes, etc. will be too subtle, too complex to be accurately described.

As this direct experience of seeing is happening:
Can a 'seer' or what's 'seen' actually be found?

Can a line of demarcation between seer or seen be found?

Or, is there just seeing happening?

Warmly,

Rowena

[Idk]

Hi, Rowena

Can a 'seer' or what's 'seen' actually be found?
Can a line of demarcation between seer or seen be found?
Or, is there just seeing happening?

Yes, there’s only the process of seeing itself. There’s no separation between what sees and what is seen, it’s all one.

[Noro]

Hi idk :)

Since you didn't answer the first lot of questions I am assuming that no "I" can be found that is not a thought, and you have clearly seen that there's no separation between what sees and what is seen. This is great and can be reaffirmed on and off whenever you bring attention to it.

I would like to add that When it is said that "it's all one", that is an add-on that is very much non-dual parlance, and is not really necessary as it is a conclusion created by thought, and as such can easily get interpreted intellectually.
"One" implies something....
Can anything be found apart from experiencing?
I would welcome your thoughts on this.


TIME EXERCISE

There is a general assumption that there is linear time that started (if started at all) somewhere very far in the past and advances to the distant future. The present moment (now) is considered to be a very small fragment of time, or an event that is moving forward on a linear line, coming from the past and advancing to the future.

But is there an experience of the ’now’ moving along the line of time?

Any experience of one ‘moment’ giving way to the next?

Is there any actual or direct experience of one event following another?

How fast is the ‘present moment’ actually moving?

Just look at 'this moment', can you find a point where it began?

How long does the ‘now’ last?

Where does the ‘now’ start, and where does it end?

When does the ‘now’ exactly become the 'past'?

What is the ‘past’ in actual experience?

So is there actual experience of ‘time’ or thoughts about ‘time’?


Please answer each question in blue. You can place several in a group if it is the same answer i.e. Yes or No.

Warmly,

Rowena

[Idk]

Hi, Rowena!
I’m really sorry for not replying yesterday, i was a little busy.

But is there an experience of the 'now' moving along the line
of time?

I just see that things are happening, but i don’t see anything as linear, if i’m being completely honest.

Any experience of one 'moment' giving way to the next?

In direct experience, there is no linearity. I only see what’s happening right now, without any linearity.

Is there any actual or direct experience of one event following another!

Absolutely not

How fast is the 'present moment' actually moving?
Just look at 'this moment', can you find a point where it began?
How long does the 'now' last?
Where does the 'now' start, and where does it end?
When does the 'now' exactly become the 'past?

It’s always the same. I mean, there’s no time here where there is no "now"

What is the 'past' in actual experience?
So is there actual experience of 'time' or thoughts about
'time'?

Just thoughts, at least that’s how i see it.

[Noro]

Hello idk,

No worries about missing a day, but thank you for mentioning it. It is helpful to keep the momentum going with inquiry.

INTRODUCTORY BODY EXERCISE
Sit with eyes closed for about 15 minutes. Paying attention only to the pure sensations, without relying on thoughts or mental images:

Please answer each question line individually using the quote system.

Can it be known how tall the body is?
Does the body have a weight or volume?
In the actual experience does the body have a shape or a form?

Can a boundary be detected between the body and the clothing?
Is there a boundary between the body and the chair?

Is there an inside or an outside?
If there is an inside - an inside of what exactly?
If there is an outside - an outside of what exactly?

What does the word/label ‘body’ actually refer to?
What is the ACTUAL experience of the body?

Look very carefully, especially with the last question. Take your time, don’t rush. You can look several times during the day while doing other things (like washing hands, showering, having a short break from work, walking, etc) before replying.

Warmly,

Rowena

[Idk]

Hi Rowena
Super hard questions this time.

Can it be known how tall the body is?

No

Does the body have a weight or volume?

I feel like this is just labels again, but i’m still experiencing sensations that people could describe as a sense of my body weight

In the actual experience does the body have a shape or a form?

I’m not sure i fully understood the question, but if it’s asking whether the body’s shape can actually be felt, then probably not. There are only sensations in different places, and that’s basically it.

Can a boundary be detected between the body and the clothing?

No, it’s just different sensations. The body perceives different sensations, but it’s impossible to draw a line, because that would just be another label. In actuality, it’s simply the sensation of clothing.

Is there a boundary between the body and the chair?

There’s just the sensation of sitting on a chair, but if nothing is labeled, then it’s simply a sensation in the body. So i’d say no.

Is there an inside or an outside?

From what i can see, there are just sensations that appear and disappear. They aren’t really called anything. So i don’t think there’s an inside or outside. Again, those are just labels.

What does the word/label 'body' actually refer to?

I think it refers to what we see and experience as the body. For example, i see a hand, the hand touches something, a sensation appears, and it’s basically the same with the rest of the body.

What is the ACTUAL experience of the body?

I know you told me to look carefully, especially when answering this question. Even so, i’m still not sure i understood it correctly, but here’s my answer: i think the actual experience of the body is just sensations. If i misunderstood the question, please correct me.

[Noro]

Hello idk,

Really great inquiry!!

Does the body have a weight or volume?

I feel like this is just labels again, but i’m still experiencing sensations that people could describe as a sense of my body weight

Yes, exactly, experiencing sensations, (let's call that an open focus)..... and then descriptions/labels/associations/concepts etc. are added on afterwards creating a narrowing of view/focus.)

What is the ACTUAL experience of the body?

I know you told me to look carefully, especially when answering this question. Even so, i’m still not sure i understood it correctly, but here’s my answer: i think the actual experience of the body is just sensations. If i misunderstood the question, please correct me.

Yes, your 'thinking' is correct, "just sensations." These questions are tricky because they can be taken as an invitation or requirement to further interpretation/description etc. as per conventional reality, but the word ACTUAL is key here and is really worth keeping in mind in your further inquiry or even when in everyday discussion.... ACTUAL refers to open focus, direct experiencing, so no need to take it further.


Keeping the above in mind, let's dive deeper!

DEEPER BODY INVESTIGATION
Here is an even deeper investigation of the body. Please follow each step, don't leave out any. Take your time, do this investigation when you are feeling relaxed and grounded. Don't move to the next step until the previous one is clearly seen.

Repeat the exercise several times.

Stand in front of a bigger mirror.

(1) First, close the eyes and feel the sensations labelled ‘body’.

(2) Then open the eyes and look into the mirror while still paying attention to the sensations.
Is there any connection between the felt sensations and the image in the mirror? Or just thoughts (and/or mental images) suggest that there is?

(3) While still paying attention to the sensations move one hand and observe the movement from the mirror.
Is there any connection between the felt sensations (labelled ‘hand’) and image of movement in the mirror?

(4) Now do the same movement with the hand, but this time look at the hand directly, not from the mirror.
Is there any connection between the felt sensations (labelled ‘hand’) and the image ‘of movement’? Or only thoughts suggest it?

(5) Now, pay attention only to the image in the mirror.
Does the image by itself suggest in any way that is ‘you’ or ‘your body’? Does the image itself suggest in any way that it is a ‘body’ at all? Or are there only colours and shapes?

(6) Where the mirror ends, some parts of the body (probably legs) cannot be seen.
Just by the image in the mirror, is there any ‘knowledge’ that there must be legs, or only thoughts and mental images suggest so?

(7) Now turn away from the mirror and look forward (don’t look directly to any body parts).
Is there a ‘body’ anywhere when all thoughts and images are ignored, or are there only sensations?

(8) Start to walk slowly.
Is there a ‘body walking’, or are there only sensations?
Is there actual experience of ‘walking’ at all, Or just thoughts about ‘walking’?

Can such a thing as ‘body’ be found OR just thoughts about a ‘body’?
Can such a thing as ‘walking’ be found?

(9) Are the sensations localized in space, like ‘going through the room’; OR is there only an image that is labelled ‘room’ and appearing sensations without any location?

Once again, please answer each question separately, and a simple YES/NO answer is fine where appropriate.
See this as an opportunity to watch the natural habit of wanting go elaborate on direct experience.
Ask yourself: "is it necessary to say more, to go further with this?"

Warmly,

Rowena