a request for guidance

[yeaabuoy]

From Eric, page 48

"Eric: Yes, Ilona, thank you so much. Of course there is no “me”, never
was and never will be, just life moving in ever-changing patterns. Noth
ing really changes because it was always like that.
Just life and certainly nobody living it or doing it. The remaining
thing is that there is a strong felt sense of a presence (?) or being or
whatever (do not want to use any spiritual platitudes), but undoubtedly
there is this strong sense of something and it is always there and never
ever changes.
But this is certainly not a personal presence or being, it is just there, vast
and empty and yet also full of everything. Is there still a deception about
something here? I do not think so... But anyway, thank you so much,
Ilona, you cleared up a lot of things for me, it was so good to have you
there as a kind of mirror and I feel a lot of respect, love, gratitude for the
work you are doing. Thank you, thank you and much love to you."


From Michael, page 63
"Where is the “I”? Where is it? What is it? Just a big hole, a sense of
dropping, like falling down a canyon... then gone, then back...
And on and on... such a miniscule shift, barely noticeable. Just did
some sitting meditation; it was easy. Seems like a somewhat different
landscape. Tricky to describe. More immediacy, less pulled away... a bit
more vividness and directness.
Nothing is different, yet it is somehow transformed. It’s more “here”.
That keeps coming: more here, more here, even just here. With passing thoughts of this or that,
past or future... less of a buying into or
being pulled."


From Joao, page 68
"João: Nothing’s really changed. The world is seen by João with a totally
new perspective now. Everything seems possible since there’s no self to
be affected. João feels that everything is right in this very moment, yet
thoughts arise in “my” head that there’s something more to achieve; that
this experience is leading ‘me’ to somewhere.
But since that “me” is just a label, “I” understand that there’s nothing
more to do. João feels something external that is affecting his under
standing in some way"

[Anastacia42]

Good. Everyone describes it differently. It is hard to put into words.

Keep looking with ButtChair.

If you like, you can try these. Be sure to listen to the Introduction.

https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fo/k1ph01pt ... v46si&dl=0

Loving,

[yeaabuoy]

You sent me these dropbox meditations before and I still listen to them periodically. I also practice buttchair and explore sensations on a daily basis. I am not sure that there has been any significant shift, so there is some frustration here. Doubt seems likely to be playing a role.

Re-reading Gateless Gatecrashers re-introduced the idea that all thoughts noticed refer to an I/self that does not exist. It raises the question of "what is doing the noticing?" Then, whatever seems to be noticing tends to reform into an "I." Not sure if any of this is useful or profound, but perhaps you can identify a fixation or an alternative approach?

Thank you

[Anastacia42]

Yes. That happens.

I call it "awareness." Some call it "consciousness." But that does not make it an "I."

A useful thing is to notice that it's all -ing verbs:

Seeing
Hearing
Feeling
Tasting
Touching

Even Life-ing

With nothing needed to be doing these things. They just happen on their own.

Relax into the idea that there is no "I" needed for any of this.

Have I sent you Pernille's videos on Doubt? Doubt is a thought. There are 2 or 3 of them. This is the first one:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_8N331jpA4

See if that helps.

Loving, (this is why I sign "lovING)

[yeaabuoy]

Hello;

Just checking in. I reviewed some of Pernilla's material on doubt, but nothing sank in. I may try to spend some more time with this later today or tomorrow. The main belief that drives the doubt is the existence of control and this separate self, so I have continued to look at this as thoughts and emotions arise.

While there is a conceptual understanding that a separate self cannot exist, in experience I find myself believing the "I" thought at times, and there is the fear that certain things will not get done if there is not an "I" to do them and pay attention to them.

I am continuing to practice buttchair, though I am not too clear on how that fits into any of this.

Hope all is well

[Anastacia42]

ButtChair shows you clearly that there is no separate "self." It's all one thing. As this dawns on you, your mind may let go of the lies. Watch for an expansive feeling, a shift in perception.

Loving,

[yeaabuoy]

Just checking in. I am still working with buttchair and examining body sensations/contact points. I also spend some time looking in my present experience for the separate "self," the source of thoughts, the chooser of actions. That's most of what I would call "my practice" at this point.

Intellectually, I know there is no separate self or chooser -- but thoughts related to guilt, anxiety, fear, time still arise, so it doesn't seem like the realization has sunk in experientially. At the same time, I have the feeling that there is not much else to do at this point.

Just wondering if you have any other insights about any of this. Thanks

[Anastacia42]

Skip any ad that shows up and watch this as many times as needed to help you to let go of fear:

https://youtu.be/jKX1llYtlKE?si=FEJQ8xkZL9c-QydK


Also, here is an anxiety exercise that focuses a person in the present, and in a part of the brain that cannot do anxiety. Basically, go through each sense and say (or think) "I see/ hear/ feel/ taste/ touch ______________." A minute or two of each and usually anxiety is gone.

I see the couch.
I see the keyboard.
I see the glass.
Etc.

I hear the train.
I hear the keys clacking.
I hear my breath.
Etc.

I feel the couch under my butt.
I feel my fingers on the keys.
I feel the cold air.
Etc.

I taste a metallic taste in my mouth.
I taste the coffee.
I taste the food.
Etc.

I smell the humidity in the air.
I smell my husband's shampoo.
I smell the soap.
Etc.

As far as I can tell, the only time this doesn't work is when someone won't do it.


Use the above in the moment when fear arises. Watch the video repeatedly on any fear you have.

Only fear and expectations can prevent seeing clearly there is no "self." That is why we ask the first 4 questions about expectations and the question about your reactions to seeing there is no "self" at the beginning. We want to handle those right away.

Much love,

[yeaabuoy]

Hey Stacy;

I was thinking it might be time to re-engage with this process, possibly with fresh eyes.
Would it be possible/recommended to start over with a new guide and what would be the best way to go about this?
Not sure if Paul Simpson is still guiding but he had mentioned giving LU another shot, so I figured I'd ask.

Thanks,
Ray

[Anastacia42]

Hi Ray,

You can do it any way you like.

You can private message Paul here & ask if he'll guide you.

Loving,

[Anastacia42]

Thursday 19th of March
MEETING WITH ILONA TODAY
 
Hello

The Shift in Perception Simplified

At the next Zoom meeting, I will share something that can help you see what this shift in perception actually is.

I’ve been exploring this with my private clients, and now I’d like to open it to you as well, and to those who follow my YouTube channel. It is very simple and easy to see visually. When it clicks, it becomes clear why working on problems doesn’t bring lasting peace, and how the shift happens in where you are looking from.

There is nothing mysterious about it. It is practical, direct, and available right here.

You are warmly invited to join the meeting. And if something comes up for you, you are welcome to bring your questions.


Seeing Through The Self Illusion

19th of March
90 min long

3 pm London
4 pm Paris
8 am San Francisco
11 am New York

Link to all monthly Zoom Meetings

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/9143364592?pw ... VEMHg2Zz09

All group meetings are free. Just come.

If you would like to donate, I would appreciate it. You can do that through PayPal here.

With love,

Ilona

My Email address is:

admin@ilonaciunaite.com
(To sign up for notices)