Explorer

[Elad]

Hello Elad and good morning… wherever you are in the world, what ever time zone you’re in,

Numbers. 44, 7, 123, 8

44 popped into awareness. Out of the blue as they say. I have no idea where it came from. Same with 7. Thought said “you “ like double digits, that’s why “you” chose 44. No, 44 arose in awareness and THEN the mind came in and said, you like double digits. Now, right now, there is a mild nausea in the stomach as 44 is considered. Interesting to note that new and different stories are concocted in attempts to explain things that seem to be just happening. There is no me creating nausea as 44 is contemplated.

Next the eyes gazed at the keyboard and saw .?123. So 123 was typed. What/ who caused the eyes to look to that area of the keyboard? There is no-thing or no-one to be found that is doing the looking.

Thank you Elad. What part of the world are you in?

Alexa, "you" are right there. 44 is the answer 💗😄🙏 Let it sink in....

I'm in Israel..

[alexa123]

Hello Elad -

How are you ? I'm grateful for your guidance.

What's next ?

FYI: I did contact Vince and received an invitation to join in on his online group meetings. Will do that one day soon. His website and also The Awakening Curriculum website & YouTube channel has been interesting and helpful.

[Elad]

Hi Alexa, great to hear!

So what is directly seen? Is there a separate self? I there controller, doer, chooser anywhere?

What is clear and what is not clear?

Remember keep the reporting on the what is simply seen. Nothing complex or intellectual or leap of faithish. Simple and plain.

[alexa123]

Hi Elad -

This morning I played tennis. The match was so enjoyable. There was the sense of a flow state, maybe ⅓ of the time, where thinking was slowed down. Awareness, it didn't seem like 'me', would focus on the printing on the ball. It seemed like this occurred when memory arose, of a coach years ago asking me to watch the ball this way. 'I' didn't go to some memory filing cabinet and pull it out, it just showed up.

My friend and I took a lesson two days ago. The pro had us work on drop shots, a shot that 'I' forget was in the tool kit. Somehow, with no intention, no planning, no thinking about it, drop shots were coming off the racquet attached to this body's hand. Beautifully executed shots! There was an ego? something that liked these winning shots.

Is there a learning by the body-mind that is almost like subconscious conditioning?

Awareness noticed sweating. the mind didn't jump in [right away] to label it humidity. there was a curiosity. moisture around the eyes, sunglasses sliding down the nose. For many years, this mind-identity would say she hated humidity. As I was playing I looked for her. Not in this body, not floating around above the tennis court. Female tennis player who lives in the deep south who hates humidity... is all made up, an illusion held only in thought.

[Elad]

This is all very clear and lovely!

No need to call the pleasure in growth and quality and excellence for ego. It is quite harmonious and won't go away. It's just enjoyed and held more lightly without self-story.

Keep looking if there is any belief in self anywhere? If there is, what is it, how does it come up? And is it true?

Remember keep just sharing what is seen, without judgement, without trying to figure anything out or achieve something. Simple asking, looking, describing what is observed.

[alexa123]

Hi Elad

Sometimes Thoughts arise and initially I seem to forget that they are on behalf of a separate me. I notice this engagement with them. But it can’t be a real conversation, it would be like two cartoon characters talking to each other.

I’m aware of thinking. What is aware that thinking is happening?

My dog is lying next to me. Is she thinking? Why is “my” awareness unable to be aware of her experience?

I’m getting impatient with looking for a separate self. It feels like I’m really looking and don’t find. But on the other hand, I’ve had this intellectual understanding of a no-self for a while. So am I really looking? Is the intellect just assuming it already knows?

[Elad]

Hi Alexa, you are getting into your head to trying to figure it out. Can we make clear once and for all that this is not what we are here for, it will not help?

One hand is seemingly separate from another, they don't touch each other, yet have no self. This is just a metaphor to maybe nudge that thinking you did. But it doesn't matter much. We are not gonna philosophically resolve if there is a separate self. Philosophically this is not resolvable.

"Sometimes Thoughts arise and initially I seem to forget that they are on behalf of a separate me."

NO! You dont "forget" that they arise "on behalf of" a "separate me". You just see the thoughts simple. Later the habitual thought/belief that "they are mine" comes. LOOK.

This is all about being very personal up close and sincere and looking: what am I taking to be a self now? Is it a self?

The frustration you are feeling is fine, can even be helpful. It is frustrating to keep believing in something and not even being clear about why. As this process starts to permeate the emotional/experiential level it can feel frustrating, helpless, etc. It's not mistake. If the reaction to it is to distract from the question or leave the inquiry or try to solve it in the head, the result will be accordingly: distractedness or giving up.But if you just feel the feelings and keep looking "what is feeling them? what is this self that supposedly doesn't get this?" we are right on track.

Nobody can control when the shift happens. It will do it in its own way and time that is not for us to figure out. We can only ask and look, ask and look.

Btw sometimes the shift is less like jumping into a pool and more like walking in a fog and getting slowly drenched and suddenly discover that one has become thoroughly wet. Also that is not worth thinking about. Only focus: Ask and look/feel/sense.

Please consider all the above CLOSELY and tell me if you have any questions.

[alexa123]

Hey Elad,

Apparently it isn’t clear yet. I’d love to get clear once and for all!

I know I’m up in the head. It feels like I’m trying so hard to figure it all out, and that’s not what we’re up to here.

I am sincerely showing up to this. I don’t seem to understand what it means to LOOK. With sight/eyeballs?

[Elad]

Hey Elad,

Apparently it isn’t clear yet. I’d love to get clear once and for all!

I know I’m up in the head. It feels like I’m trying so hard to figure it all out, and that’s not what we’re up to here.

I am sincerely showing up to this. I don’t seem to understand what it means to LOOK. With sight/eyeballs?

It's okay, step by step. Please also tell me what comes up in response to the other things I shared with you in the last message.

In relation to the question of what is direct experience, am sharing these reflections, some of which I believe you had before, but that is fine, it's normal sometimes we need to hear something 100 times before it clicks.

Coloured Socks

There is a big difference between knowing that there is nothing to give up and seeing that there is nothing to give up.
Here is an example to illustrate the difference:
If I ask you what colour socks you are wearing right now you have two ways to come up with an answer:
• You can have a think about it, you can think back to this morning and try to remember putting your socks on, and you can probably tell me what colour you think they are.
• Alternatively, you can take a quick look at your socks and tell me what colour they actually are!
Hopefully you would agree that you can only be 100% certain by looking.
For the purpose of our dialogue together, it is going to be very important that you are clear about this difference. Knowing is about knowledge which is all in the mind and we are not interested in that. We are only interested in looking at and seeing what is actually going on in your present moment to moment experience. We are only interested in your direct experience in the moment.
Please let me know if you are clear about this or if you would like any further clarification.
Weather Check
As a variation of the socks exercise

Direct Experience

Sit quietly and relax, take your time just looking at what is in front of you for awhile. Observe how the mind is dividing and labelling every thing into objects and is embellishing them with stories about what they are. Give it some time.

Then, stop watching the objects as labelled objects. Just look at the seeing itself. Observe the pure process of seeing. This is direct experience (DE).

[Elad]

Ps. When you say you know you are in your head, what knows that and how? "That" which knows, is direct experience...

[alexa123]

Elad -

'That which knows is DE." helpful...

Earlier this morning, I wrote to a woman in WhatsApp group I'm in. She asked the group, do you like this domain name? I replied yes... and would you like to brainstorm taglines? She wrote back, glad you liked the domain name, you are so kind.

I felt a response in the body, a jumping in the chest area. THEN a thinking mechanism labeled it, rejection or whatever.... She said that to me.

Who is she? Where is her? What am I? I know I was aware of fingers typing on keyboard, there was awareness of a felt sensation in the body, and I watched the mind jump in to give meaning to the sensation. All of this happened without an entity making it happen.

The heart area "jumped" of its own accord. Thee content of the thinking was generated by a not "me." Perhaps a me would have liked to chose a different interpretation... but it couldn't. Because the is no me, no entity with any capacity to control the content of thinking.

[alexa123]

Hi Elad -

It's been a while since I've heard from you, is everything okay?

[Elad]

[quote=alexa123 post_id=391414 time=1714909543 user_id=15836]
Hi Elad -

It's been a while since I've heard from you, is everything okay?
[/quote]

Hi Alexa, so sorry, I thought I had answered! Please dont hesitate to send an email here or to eladexplore1111@gmail.com if I am more then 24 hours to answer.

Your last post was VERY clear. Lovely.

Take 20 minutes sitting very still in silence, facing a wall eyes softly open, everything being as it is. After write me.

What is seen?

What does "I" refer to?

There never was a self a controller, is it true?

[alexa123]

Hello Dear Elad,

It seems this "me" has gone through the Gateless Gate, perhaps a while ago.

I'm going to continue with what I've been involved in and also move on to other modes of exploration.

So much gratitude for your guidance.
With Love,
Alexa

[Elad]

Yay 🌻💚🌻

Alexa, at this at LU we have final questions, they might lead to helpful nudges from me, and if I have nothing, I let the post be seen by a few other guides, who might have helpful nudges. Finishing this process, you get access to some LU graduate forums etc., I will share about that later. So please answer all the questions below in one post, making sure each answer is below it's appropriate question for ease of reading. Enjoy, looking forward to read your answers.



1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

ANSWER:

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

ANSWER:

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before we started this dialogue? Please report from the past couple of days.

ANSWER:

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over; made you look?

ANSWER:

5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control.

ANSWER:

6) What makes things happen? How does it work?

ANSWER:

7) What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

ANSWER:

8) Anything to add?

ANSWER: