The fire for truth

[Erica82]

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
My understanding is there is only life unfolding in this moment. No one with free will making choices, only thoughts that claim I or me as the experiencer. I see clearly this ever present, effortless awareness has always been here but it wasn’t recognized before.

What are you looking for at LU?
I’m not sure if I have some fixations or ideas that are keeping me from really living this. I still can be taken away by doubt& frustration. Waiting is an idea but can feel real at times. Someone to help would be amazing.

What do you expect from a guided conversation?
I’m open to whatever comes up& really don’t except anything like some amazing experience, I’m not interested in that. Only the truth of what is beyond getting caught up in believing the voice of doubt. To have a conversation with someone that can help is something I feel would be helpful no matter what.

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
I spent years meditating & 3 years ago came across non duality. Since then the desire for truth is the only thing that matters. I’ve inquired into no self, time, awareness. I have had recognitions time is never experienced. The knowing of experience is effortless& seems to be the only reality experienced. I see reality is already unconditioned& the mental overlay on everything. My senses are more heightened& I can feel life-sound, vibration. Although this has unfolded there is a sense of incompleteness. It is deeper than emotions. Over the past year allowing everything & feeling I can’t escape from lol maybe it’s still this lingering belief in being a doer. I really am not sure.

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self?
10

[pozablo]

Hi Erica,

You noted that:

I still can be taken away by doubt& frustration. ..Only the truth of what is beyond getting caught up in believing the voice of doubt...Only the truth of what is beyond getting caught up in believing the voice of doubt....I can’t escape from lol maybe it’s still this lingering belief in being a doer

.

So there is an "I" and also there is a doubt that "I" cannot escape? :-)

"Look for the I".
"But....who is doing the looking?"
:-)

OK, I promise this is not a trick question, or a leading question:
How would you know what is true?
What would it take for you to accept something as true?

NOTE: When I type the word I or me or you, they refer to the location where something is happening.

Pablo
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[Erica82]

That is a good point. I is an idea, a thought. When really examined Truth is also a concept. Before concepts all that is certain is the knowing of experience. It is clearing seen that this awakness/knowing (they are concepts but for communication purposes) has always been present. Present before the concept of present, but somehow overlooked. There is no effort to be. Without believing thought life is happening. To even say I feel like I am here is not true. When examined there’s no one. So who is even believing or caught up? It’s a thought!?

[Erica82]

Sticking with direct experience this I is just a thought. Doubt is a thought. It appears then is gone. It’s effortlessly perceived. Whatever is actually here beyond& before any concept doesn’t get caught up in thoughts. Thought can continue to look but that’s really just trying to label life, it can’t be labeled. Even awakening is a concept. How can this that is already here wake up? If that makes sense

[pozablo]

Nice to see such a well-considered response, thank you.
I’m curious as to how I can be of help.