Beautiful!!!No, there are no others and there is no an 'I' in others. Others can only be experienced as the same interdependent movement or 'aliveness' happening as 'others'.
Exactly! Once the empty nature of this “separate self “ is seen, together with “others” “phone”, etc., then these are seen as useful tools like the icons on your computer screen.When I do this observation 'I' can see how life is happening as a whole and that there are no separate things anywhere. After some time or if something ordinary happens (phone rings, somebody calls) thoughts bring 'me' to separate state. It takes some time to once again realize that there is no separate 'me' and separate caller. This jumping is happening all the time. At least now I can see that this jumping is just happening and is also a part of the same interdependent movement. Who should decide that there should be no 'jumping back to separate self and once again to no separate self' if there is no decision maker. So it is just 'jumping' :)
When someone we know dies, it takes time for that to "sink in". It's not that we don't believe that the person has died. It is just they are still part of our lives - we open the wardrobe and their clothes are still there, we walk in the park and we remember when we used to do it together. It takes time to readjust our lives to living without them. That process of “sinking in” can be observed in many other situations – like being diagnosed with a life changing disease, losing a job that we had for a long time etc. Even though the change is sudden and quick, it can be perceived as a long process – it can feel as though something is still sinking in, or hasn’t yet sunk in.
The point applies equally to habitual patterns of thought and activity, which similarly reflect how our lives are organised. When the established patterns of a life are disturbed, thought cannot adapt to all of this in an instant, simply by revising all of our old beliefs. Much of the old organisation lingers on, in the guise of a world that we continue to experience and in habitual patterns of thought and activity that our surroundings continue to elicit. That very much applies to seeing the illusion of an “I” - it’s quite a sudden change with a relatively long process of adapting to this change. The recognition of no self is just the beginning of seeing life and “yourself” in a new light. It takes time to clean up all old beliefs and conditioning.
To “deal” with this, question everything, and little by little you will notice changes in everyday life: less judgment, more openness; less thinking, more appreciation; less story, more being; less structure, more flow. You will notice that some habitual thoughts no longer arise. The story changes in a way that allows more space for simply being.
There might still be expectations, confusion, and doubt. That’s quite normal at this stage. You may be swaying between “I get it” and “I don’t get it.” You may be thinking that this is not enough, that some experiences need to happen, that you should be happy and blissful all the time. When these thoughts arise, bring the focus to what is present here now. Just THIS. And look again: what is here that wants THIS to be different (including the presence of doubtful thoughts)?
Is there anything else that you want to explore together? Is there still seeking? How is life these days?
Love
Rali
