Only conceptually passed the gate - Need help through it for real

[BeingAware]

Good morning Vince!

I'm still happily poking, prodding and questioning this imaginary sens of self continuosly. So far it has been fruitious!

Last weekend me and my wife went shopping for furniture and I did the self-inquiry while walking through the store. I felt a very tangible fear hit me when I suddenly realized there was no one doing the browsing, or walking. There was a T-body walking with his wife but nothing was controlling the T-body.
It was like a micro second of "letting go of control" and then fear hit and just immediately "took it back" (of course this is just thought that thinks it has any control, but you know what I mean).

Later this week at work I'm sitting in a big auditorium with somewhere around 70-80 people.
I was called upon to share some information and data on my areas plans for the coming months.
I shared it, answered a couple of questions pretty calmly. And that was it.
Afterwards I was just stunned! I realized I'm NOT sitting here with a 180bpm pulse and adrenaline pumping noisily through my ears. I'm completely calm. Unfazed.
I always get extremely self conscious about these kinds of presentations and talking in front of people.
But this time I just didn't care. I didn't think for one millisecond about what people around me think about me.
It felt amazing!!!

There hasn't been any more "big insights" later this week, just this very slight sense of "something missing that's usually there"...
So I'm just gonna keep this poking and prodding up, I like it, still feels "right". :)

Have a wonderful day!
Much love

T

[vinceschubert]

Good one T, i really like the discovery mode that you seem to be in.
Even with the fear, there's nothing to do but watch.
When I mentor a new guide, if often respond to their doubts with "trust your new perspective. The wisdom that comes with awakening is enough for you to see what is actual and what is concept. ..and the response to that concept.

vince

[BeingAware]

Good evening Vince!

The insights seem to come and go in waves. One period there are some insights, then there's a period mixed of more selfing, some observing and a normal amount of "ordinary life" without any significant changes. Then an insight again.

All in all more relaxed, less reactive, less attached to thought. Just open now, letting go of the illusion of control.
Enjoying the ride. 😊

Much love
T

[vinceschubert]

Hi T,

Enjoying the ride. 😊

Excellent.

then there's a period mixed of more selfing,

You could look at these as an opportunity.
You are obviously in discovery mode, so great...

with love

vince

[vinceschubert]

Hi T,

Enjoying the ride. 😊

Excellent.

then there's a period mixed of more selfing,

You could look at these as an opportunity.
You are obviously in discovery mode, so great...

with love

vince