Living Truth

[Lubo]

Hi Alan,

I had just about completed a post to you when I hit a key by mistake and deleted the whole thing. Grrrr !!! Frustration is here right now!!! Being experienced in the body !

Oo, I am so sorry for this. its happened here also :)

I hear you saying that as long as there is a belief that a separate body has been born, then there will be a conviction that there is a separate self (a separate entity) running the show.

yes, it sounds good. Because there is only now and only This, the born body makes hard to be realise the truth.
Thoughts say that there is an you who is running the show and you move hands for example or thoughts moves hands, but notice that character is mind construction, and thoughts don't have hands ;) or?

The body is experienced through seeing(looking), feeling, hearing, smelling and tasting. These are words that point to different "dimensions" or aspects of experiencing. These dimensions of experience cannot be turned on or off. They simply are - always. Unchanging. No entity is controlling them

Yes, and yes, notice that experience happens by itself and only thoughts say there is a character/self? But everything is hold, appears by itself, by wholeness?

The "right hand" moves up and makes contact (scratches) with the itch and the sensation changes. This happens with out any entity deciding to do it. It is not possible to find a discreet boundary with these sensations. There is also what might be call gurgling felt in the stomach. There is also a sound heard with this gurgling.

Notice how something which appear as wholeness is separate? :)

The only difference between day and night is the colors we see or not see

Yes, the question is - is there a noon day/night or there is just what happened? Is there "who" in day/nights?
is there "who" in the experience called man or this is whats happening right now?

Love
Lubo

[Alless]

Hello Lubo

Apologies for not getting back to you yesterday. I was looking for your reply but did not see it until just now. I'll simply say it was "technical problems on my part" :)-

There is a shift being experienced these last couple of days. Hopefully this will go some ways to answer your questions in the last post.

I'll go back to something you said on Wednesday to help here:

Look, until there is a believe that there is separate body which is born - the self/entity holds there.

A couple of days ago a very strong resistance arose Something like "This is rubbish !!! Of course I'm here and other things are over there. Everything is relative to this body !!! "

And I looked AGAIN. And saw that seeing not only included everything "out there" but this body also. In the experience of seeing there is no difference between the body and everything else. While everything is seen "here" there is no one here doing the seeing. Because experience always includes this body it SEEMS to be the central object. But seeing is not happening because of the body. The body is part of the experience of seeing. What is seeing I cannot tell. Seeing simply is.

When I truly look seeing includes this body AND everything in the field of vision (including thoughts) and there is no actual boundary between them. The body is seen in the same way that everything else is seen. Even inside and outside are not distinguishable. I used to believe that thoughts were seen inside my head and now realise that thoughts appear "here" just as everything else does. Thoughts arise which challenge what is actually experienced. These thoughts, if believed, are what recreates an illusion of what is really happening.

From time to time there is still a pull back into the illusory way of seeing but it is no longer the default position. For instance, when going to the bathroom, going to the bathroom happens and then the thought "I'm going to the bathroom" is there. What decides to go to the bathroom? It somehow happens. Sensations appear and without thinking about it going to the bathroom happens !!! Its perfect in its timing (usually unless thought gets in the way and delays the going !!!)

Love

Alan

[Lubo]

hey, Alan, wonderful
Yes. Yes. Stay here.

let's look thoughts.

...and then the thought "I'm going to the bathroom" is there.

Notice that these thoughts are not a problem.
Notice the illusion that there is an entity/ego/ which uses thoughts in general, which owns thoughts, which produce thoughts...?
Notice that seeing thoughts as something which appears by itself is killing illusion of an entity/ego?
Are thoughts real when you found that there is no thinker?

love and freedom,
Lubo

[Alless]

Thank you Lubo

Notice that these thoughts are not a problem.

That the thoughts are not a problem is what is experienced. For instance when the thought "I am going to the bathroom" appears, its like a smile comes to my face with the feeling "Oh you're a bit late because your telling something that is already happening !!

Notice the illusion that there is an entity/ego/ which uses thoughts in general, which owns thoughts, which produce thoughts...?
Notice that seeing thoughts as something which appears by itself is killing illusion of an entity/ego?

Yes, yes. It's as though the thoughts are seen through for what they are - something that comes late to the party, so to speak, and are of no particular use

Are thoughts real when you found that there is no thinker?

No. Only if I believe them do they seem to have any power.

There was the experience of hearing today. Someone was explaining something which was at odds with what I saw to be real However there was no compulsion to interject. Just a willingness to listen without feeling that they needed "sorting out" as it was clear they were very sure they were right. And at the same time there was space to feel sensations that were happening on the stomach. Thoughts seemed to be so much quieter than normal and even missing !! There was no thinking about what I was going to say to them when they stopped speaking. No compelling urge to do anything but experience hearing. So much more freedom for them to speak.

Love


Alan

[Lubo]

Wonderful, Alan,

"Oh you're a bit late because your telling something that is already happening !!

Wow, Yes. Now notice what is to find that there is no doer or controller?

And at the same time there was space to feel sensations that were happening on the stomach.

Yes, sensations just point that there is something which is triggered, explore what is it? I'll give you a clue - anger, shame, deficiency story ...
Notice that there is no way anything to triggered you if there is nothing which can be triggered, if there is no one which protects or is under protection or something to be hidden. Don't believe me anything, check with honesty what is truth for you and put it on the table.

Invite memory to bring this conversation here and investigate what exactly was the trigger and what's triggered?
This is very powerful investigation, it will set you free from an hidden pattern program which rules live and sabotage you.

Love and light,
Lubo

[Alless]

Good to hear from you Lubo.

Thank you for your quick responses and for all your guidance

Wow, Yes. Now notice what is to find that there is no doer or controller?

So clear there is no one controlling. And it can pop up again in many guises (as I found below !!!) But when I realize what's happening and I stop and look, even momentarily, it is so clear again that there is no doer. Like giving ones glasses a clean if they are fogged up a little so that you can see clearly again.

Invite memory to bring this conversation here and investigate what exactly was the trigger and what's triggered?
This is very powerful investigation, it will set you free from an hidden pattern program which rules live and sabotage you.

The issue here was something that arises fairly often, and resentment and anger can rise as well when the issue arises. What I was pointing to seemed so abundantly clear that there was frustration that the people I was with could not see it the way I saw it. I have sat with it as you suggested and looked for the source of the frustration. And it became very clear that I was expecting them to see something that, likely because of their own experience, they did not want to see or were not able to see. I could see that the "me" felt/believed it had a responsibility to make them see things differently. An erroneous belief. It is another aspect of the desire to control something that could never be controlled. It's fine to express what comes for one to express but to try and "impose" and make people see creates resistance. I'm seeing that it is resistance to "what is" that keeps unwanted emotions in place. When I saw what was really happening here, the whole thing seemed to crumble and the issue disappeared. And no doubt I will have other opportunities to see whether or not it has really dissolved completely or not!!

Love

Alan

[Lubo]

Hi Alan,

So clear there is no one controlling. And it can pop up again in many guises (as I found below !!!) But when I realize what's happening and I stop and look, even momentarily, it is so clear again that there is no doer. Like giving ones glasses a clean if they are fogged up a little so that you can see clearly again

Wonderful.
So, is there an you in the body, behind the eyes, you who is speaking...can you point anything which is yours?

It is another aspect of the desire to control something that could never be controlled.

Ok. desires are here and it is natural.
But what is the Direct Experience of control?
Is there control panel? Right on the piece of paper "This is control" and find the place where you can put this label?

Love
Lubo

[Alless]

Evening Lubo

To your questions

So, is there an you in the body, behind the eyes, you who is speaking...can you point anything which is yours?

There is no me anywhere to be found.

But what is the Direct Experience of control?
Is there control panel? Right on the piece of paper "This is control" and find the place where you can put this label?

The Direct Experience of control is this. Everything just happens without a controller. Walking to the kitchen, going shopping, writing this email - it all happens. If a narrative is noticed it is clear that this is a commentary on what has ALREADY happened (even a split second ago) but it appears after the fact. It is not announcing what will happen. When the controller is looked for there is nowhere it can be pinpointed. No place where it can be located. I've looked for the control panel but it is missing - this body or mind doesn't appear to have come with this feature at all !! I've got the label in my hand with no where to put it !!

Love

Alan

[Lubo]

Wow Alan, No words.
Wonderful. Yes!

The Direct Experience of control is this. Everything just happens without a controller. Walking to the kitchen, going shopping, writing this email - it all happens. If a narrative is noticed it is clear that this is a commentary on what has ALREADY happened (even a split second ago) but it appears after the fact. It is not announcing what will happen. When the controller is looked for there is nowhere it can be pinpointed. No place where it can be located. I've looked for the control panel but it is missing - this body or mind doesn't appear to have come with this feature at all !! I've got the label in my hand with no where to put it !!

So, there is only reality, freedom, which appears as what happens and there is no controller of reality because what will be separate from reality and control reality? something unreal ;)
Now notice what this word reality pоints to? What is this, there is no self but it is obvious that there is something?

What makes things happen?
Dive in this, allow "your head to be eaten"
Notice that everything appears as free will, is there anything which is not free will itself?
is there anything which is the name ?
Is there anything which is Alan or there is free will appears as what is named Alan? Is there Alan, something which is separate with own free will but not free will itself?

Love
Lubo

[Alless]

Hi Lubo

You say

there is no controller of reality because what will be separate from reality and control reality? something unreal ;)

Wow!! What a potent way to say it. Sitting with this blows the mind to smithereens ;) Or rather it disappears into the nothingness from which it comes and then mysteriously it somehow seems to "reassemble" itself and pops up again !! But the mind is now seen for what it is. It's not the master even though thoughts say it is but the mind is another absolute inexplicable miracle without which the experiencing of this 3D world as we know it would not be.

Now notice what this word reality pоints to? What is this, there is no self but it is obvious that there is something?

It ultimately points to a nothingness which can never be described in any way. If every thing is ultimately made of this reality (which is not something) and made by this reality which this reality itself is made of, how can "any thing" be different or separate in any way???

Dive in this, allow "your head to be eaten"

I'm doing what you say !!!! I just can't fathom what's eating my head as it happens !!!

Notice that everything appears as free will, is there anything which is not free will itself?

Oh yes the big question of free will. So if reality is all that is AND it is this of which everything consists AND it is this that makes everything of itself how can there be ANYTHING other than reality itself to be free will. No individual can divide oneself off and become different because that which we think we are is made of the same reality. Like taking a glass of water out of the Atlantic Ocean and claiming it is made of something different (a poor analogy I know)

Is there anything which is Alan or there is free will appears as what is named Alan? Is there Alan, something which is separate with own free will but not free will itself?

Alan is a bunch of thoughts that appears to have free will when a sort of hypnosis plays its magic through the mind (what an absolute miracle in itself that the infinite can somehow create the illusion of the finite). Could we say that the belief / believer that Alan exists is a product of free will itself but Alan sure has no free will as a separate being. So the words free will and the word reality point to the same non-substance which is the only substance.

This may sound a bit mixed up but so hard to describe.

Love

Alan

[Lubo]

hi Alan,
your reply resonate deeply with me.
Notice that the thoughts fallowing you.
Whatever seeing and understanding comes the thoughts will come to comment or describe.
You know many teachers or books which are thoughts which report reality.
We can investigate thoughts to find where is our understanding or believe.

Thought - I am alive - points that there is identification with all this what appears called life, but life is known, can you see this?

More interesting is the though "I am Alan/me/self/entity"
Notice the identification whit something which life appears as.
There is something which is called sky, sun, flower...life and the illusion is that there is a subject . is there anything which is flower? I am flower?
The same Alan is the name of life which appears as human, I am Alan is identification with what life appears. Notice is there anyone in Alan? Anyone in others humans?
Is there life and humans which are living life?
Or life appears empty from subject objects?
Questions sounds like invitation for intellectual answer but this is quite opposite. Notice the believe that there is someone in the humans but not life itself?
I am Alan=I am flower
Also notice that humans and flowers are separate from borders or there is no borders just they are different appearances of life itself?
And all worries of thoughts programs for separate Alan are they make sense?
Is there Alan in Alan which can take care about Alan?

Love
Lubo

[Alless]

Hello Lubo

You say

Questions sounds like invitation for intellectual answer but this is quite opposite

I know you asking these questions as an invitation to look and look again. So my answers may be short but be assured there is looking happening here because of where your questions point.

Notice the believe that there is someone in the humans but not life itself?

That's what I'm now seeing the mind does so quick - overlooks that any "thing" is the one life, (the only life there is which cannot be divided) appearing as something and the mind puts a label on that thing

Is there Alan in Alan which can take care about Alan?

No. Alan as a thing in what is called Alan. There is no Alan even to look for Alan. What is seen is called Alan but Alan is simply life expressing in this unique way. Just like a cloud in the sky. Made of the sky, by the sky as conditions within the sky itself change. We call it sky when really it is another unique expression of reality / life itself - which itself cannot be found but without which nothing exists. We could say that the sky is teeming with life, is full of life itself. So the question then arises "What is containing all this life?" The very life that it is full of !!!! Itself :)-

Love


Alan

[Lubo]

Hi Alan,
Let's clear your experience from story about self in the body.
Notice the burden "me Alan" which has a story, shame, guilt...
Notice the innocence of what is, in this very moment?
Notice what experience called life is, without a someone which lives in the story?
Notice the diference between "I Alan read this" and "reading is happening, no shame, no guilt, no doer" ?

What is coming ?

Love
Lubo

[Alless]

Hello my Friend

When you say

Notice the burden

I realized that there is something here that I had not notices before. I realize it has always been there and it is felt as a weight. Burden and weight can be seen as synonyms I guess but somehow the word weight seems to resonate.

Interesting !!!

What is coming ?

I cannot find any "me" at all when I look but there is this weight / shadow that seems to be very close at hand. It seems to be something to do with the "me" that is like a lingering odor. It is not distinct but it has the what seems to be associated with things like shame or guilt. Not thick but more like a thin fog.

There is the innocence of this moment right here now however this fog seems to be surrounding it

I get a very real sense I need to sit with this and let it show itself completely.

Does that make sense Lubo?

With love


Alan

[Lubo]

Hi Alan, :)
I am glad to explore with you

I realized that there is something here that I had not notices before. I realize it has always been there and it is felt as a weight. Burden and weight can be seen as synonyms I guess but somehow the word weight seems to resonate.
Interesting !!!

Yes. it is like heavy weight.
What is it made of?
What is behind it?
What will happen if you notice thаt there is no self which cares it on? Is it a problem?

I get a very real sense I need to sit with this and let it show itself completely.

Yes. this is self=program.
Focus on what is here, behind this wight, shadow, shame and guilt?
What life looks like without it?

Love
Lubo