I am

[suzana]

hi Jeff,

you might be busy....I am working further on...and already writing here...so we can go on...:-)

when I go into inquiry who wants no contraction or what is there that dislikes the contractions....and like disturbance of attention on the "space" there is no entity to be found...it dissolves...it disappears in the space...like it is bringing the space back...which is the all time there...

How is the baby dealing … sensing the both?
Baby is not bothered by it. It even doesn’t experience it as a duality ...it doesn’t care about it. Everything is fine.

when I sense this...it is again no contradiction...I sense it as a no mind baby that I don't care about contractions or even space...it is only that what is...it makes me sad...right now...to feel it...
only that what is...no meaning in this one realm...everything is allowed....everything is fine...
how could I ever "judge" it :-) sort of ...I don't need this vortat...what is my suffering in it..baby doesn't suffer..baby is delighted to be and to be a part of the show...not seeing itself....

this like is the actuall state...
I hope you appears soon Jeff...:-)
I am lost without a guidance :-))))
hugs

[AwayKen127]

Hi Suzana!

I am lost without a guidance :-))))

I think you're doing just great guiding yourself. You have access to Beginner's Mind. With that, you can see which way to go.

when I go into inquiry who wants no contraction or what is there that dislikes the contractions....and like disturbance of attention on the "space" there is no entity to be found...it dissolves...it disappears in the space...like it is bringing the space back...which is the all time there...

when I sense this...it is again no contradiction...I sense it as a no mind baby that I don't care about contractions or even space...it is only that what is...it makes me sad...right now...to feel it...
only that what is...no meaning in this one realm...everything is allowed....everything is fine...
how could I ever "judge" it :-) sort of ...I don't need this vortat...what is my suffering in it..baby doesn't suffer..baby is delighted to be and to be a part of the show...not seeing itself....

this like is the actuall state...

Your clarity is beautiful. Tell me more about

it makes me sad...right now...to feel it...

Hugs,
Jeff

[suzana]

Tell me more about

There isn’t more at the moment to tell about it. It’s the edge.
I woke up today with the thought what Vince said “like a fetus “ Buddhist way … I don’t know exactly …
I was wondering if this is the going further in the no separate self … and I reached when sensing it the origin of my sadness yesterday.. I suppose
It’s only a story but I had as a fetus a perfect experience of not Being separate self not only being connected to my mother but because I had a twin brother … we were not seaparate from each other and we were not separate from our mother .. the world …
He died in the third month of pregnancy…
As I said it is a story about one part of my life
And at the moment touches many themes
of separation
Being
Death
Life
No boundaries
Now I have to drink some coffee
Hugs

[AwayKen127]

Thank you for sharing the story about your sadness, Suzana. I feel sadness, too, to hear it.

Are there any doubts at all about seeing through the illusion of the separate self?

Hugs,
Jeff

[suzana]

Are there any doubts at all about seeing through the illusion of the separate self?

I don’t know nothing at the time.
In each inquiry I go to the bottom of the Illusion of separate self. In all our exercises until now.

I do notice though although my reacting is reduced as I said in the meeting …I do not stick so long and don’t get caught in emotions … I do still react. I had in the train a situation where I shouted at one stranger being loud in front of us for one hour talking on his phone.

Or I got „mad“ because of one doctor of mine who didn’t believe me…

How can I dislike this situations and react to them if I am no separate self. I don’t have any doubt …but I suppose this to fall down!! I gave both situations and my emotions quickly up … after I reacted but it happened!!

I want to inquire in to this dislikes and reactivness please?
How I do that?? Hugs

[AwayKen127]

Excellent, Suzane. You are past the First Fetter and you are still bound by the Fourth and Fifth Fetters, although they are loosening. So you are technically beyond the scope of what we do here at LU, which is only about seeing through the illusion of the separate self (First Fetter). Therefore, I think it is time for you to answer Final Questions, be welcomed through the Gateless Gate, and then continue the Fetter inquiry with me or someone else in a different medium. Then you would be able to attend the Fetters meeting that Todd runs after passing through the Gateless Gate.

Do you feel ready for Final Questions?

Hugs,
Jeff

[suzana]

Do you feel ready for Final Questions?

Yes.

Hugs

[AwayKen127]

To answer your question, there are many layers of self, and almost no one sees through them all at once. The first layer is that of the doer/decider/thinker, which is identification with thoughts. After that is gone, there is still identification with body, with point of view, and with experience.

FINAL QUESTIONS
1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
 2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.  
 3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days. 
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look? 
5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience. 
6) Anything to add?

Big Hugs!
Jeff

[suzana]

Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

There was .. is and will never be separate entity self.. me…nowhere, in no shape, form, time or realm.

Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

It begins after the birth … through the „ belonging“ to the special family and parents being seen from them as their child. Being thought hi I am your mama… you are this and that … girls make this or that … this is what you should do in order to be Suzana or Jeff … you are here and others are there …
Through society… all the concepts of us being pressed on us to teach are who we “ are” .. what we should be

All the competitions being held about identification… me is going to be the fastes runner … the best doctor … Me and I … separating the people from their essence
The struggle in life is fast almost always struggling to get the me being approved .. me being understood … me against other “me s”
It is being sold to people that this is the meaning of life.. that in that way they can control the life .. the prosperity .. being happy …etc
We as we identify with us … and making it strong
.... are going to get something! This illusion is being sold and taught through the whole life.

[How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days. /quote]
It feels in this moment like .. thank you Life for showing (me ) this.
Thank you for revealing and liberating!
The difference to Before as I was going like WTF is going on here. Why are we being fooled. It makes me crazy!

The past few days were relevant after the continuous guidance which was great in this continuum and sticking to the actual state … I have never had such a intensive guidance about this things …is the meeting with so many guides .. and people which are on this path. It hit me and pushed me forwards.

[suzana]

What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

It was this experience with staying tuned in with guidance and the meeting. There were so “ different “ perspectives and ways to get to me … and everybody was saying and “ pushing “ me in the same way.

[quote Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.][/quote]

We do not have control over the things. The illusion is as I wrote before we are taught and trimmed to believe we are doing it .. we can change the flow of the life. Even though when we sometimes say ok Zi am going to do this and that it is not said that we made a decision.
I don’t know how the things happen. The life is lifing.

And still if I am not a doer .. a changer .. a decider .. my responsibility is not to kill or harm others etc. and than say sorry I am not a doer. Like for example some teacher in spiritual circles … who abused their disciples and thought they are not a doer.
Like me shouting at the man in the train … it was really interesting.. I didn’t plan it … or catching the right moment to do it .. to say it … the anger was there but at that moment it bursted out of me. Like I haven’t decided it now I am going to say something. It is enough. No it bursted out of me. I was watching myself at the same moment and was surprised. It flow itself. At the moment I realized I am shouting and telling him he has to go out of the train :-)))) I realized everybody is hearing me … like him the last hour. First At that moment I got red … in my face … got embarrassed that I expose myself and intrude.
Funny!!

6. Nothing else.

Hugs

[AwayKen127]

Your answers look great to me, Suzana. I will post a link to the LU Guide Central Facebook page. Three other guides will review your answers and confirm you or ask further questions. Stay tuned!
Hugs,
Jeff

[AwayKen127]

Hi Suzana,
The guides have no further questions. Congratulations! This thread will be archived.

It has been an absolute pleasure working with you. :)

You will be invited soon to LU facebook groups. Meanwhile, if you are interested, read "how to become a guide" here :
viewtopic.php?f=16&t=1458
I''m pretty sure we could use some German-speaking guides.

I look forward to seeing you on Zoom calls and you can contact me by email any time.
Hugs and all best wishes,
Jeff

[suzana]

Hi Jeff,
My pleasure working with you too!!
Thank you so much!!
I am very happy!
See u talk 2 u :-)
Hugs and all the best for you!
Suzana