Clear Seeing

[Anastacia42]

Alright. Let's move on. Do tell me if you notice a Sensation there, but because you found:

There is no self. There is no lurking “I”.

and did notice some Sensation

Something registered in the abdomen while seeking evidence of a shadowy “I” figure. I cannot say if it was tension or some other sensation.

We can proceed.

Let's go back to the exercise through which I saw no self, ButtChair. You were doing well with that one. It is the only pointer I was given. I did it for something like 3 months until I saw.

So LOOK for any place where butt end & chair begins. It is the looking that matters. Hang out there. Post what is true, what is found.

Loving,

[Lon]

Hello Stacy

So look for any place where butt ends and chair begins. It is LOOKING that matters. Hang out there. Post what is true what is found.

After sitting awhile without the thought or knowledge of a chair there was a feeling of my body flowing toward the floor.(sorry about the weirdness) It was noticed that something solid touched buttocks and thighs but was not seen as chair-butt separation. It was just sitting and the something solid was present in this just sitting.
Regards Mal

[Anastacia42]

Good morning

Weirdness is fine.

Can you find any separate self anywhere? Has there ever been?

How does it feel to see this?

Loving

[Lon]

Hello Stacy

Can you find any separate self anywhere

?
No, I cannot locate this self that was supposedly me for many years.

Has there ever been?

If there is no self now, then there was no self in all the former nows that make up the past either.

How does it feel to see this?

Words are proving elusive here. There is a feeling of spaciousness and that is the most noticeable. But it is all so subtle that I can’t claim that a shift has occurred . Something is happening at its’ own pace, perhaps a slow unfolding. Other terms crop up, like expansiveness but I am wary of the imagination getting involved. The Gateless Gate could be close or maybe far away but more work is needed to cross that threshold. I feel I am in good hands Stacy, thank you for your guidance.

Regards Mal

[Anastacia42]

Good morning, Mal,

more work is needed to cross that threshold.

Maybe. Maybe not.

There are other things to see through, so let's move on.

Introductory Body Exercise

Sit with eyes closed for about 15 minutes. Paying attention only to the pure sensations, without relying on thoughts or mental images:

Can it be known how tall the body is? Does the body have a weight or volume? In the actual experience does the body have a shape or a form?

Is there a boundary between the body and the clothing? Is there a boundary between the body and the chair?

Is there an inside or an outside? If there is an inside - the inside of what exactly? If there is an outside - the outside of what exactly?

What does the word/label ‘body’ ACTUALLY refer to? What is the ACTUAL experience of the body?

Look very carefully, especially with the last question. Take your time, don’t rush. You can look several times during the day while doing other things (like washing hands, showering, having a short break from work, walking, etc) before replying.

Loving,

[Lon]

Hello Stacy

Can it be known how tall the body is? Does the body have weight or volume? In the actual experience does the body have a shape or form.

There appear to be no clear sensations indicating height, weight, shape or form in actual experience.

Is there a boundary between the body and clothing? Is there a boundary between body and chair?

The touch of clothing is felt on parts of the body but does not indicate a boundary. The chair is noticed under buttocks and thighs but this did not appear as a division.

Is there an inside or an outside? If there is an inside- the inside of what exactly?

From a sensations perspective, the boundary between inside and outside lacks definition or if it did I could not identify it although I know that there is an inside as doctors have probed in there and food and drink end up there too. I have a physical body covered in skin that keeps it all contained with this body. You probably know I am struggling with this question.

What does the word/label “body” Actually refer to? What is the actual experience of the body?

The physical body is real in that it is seen and felt. The senses that were noticed seem to register in the body. My whole sense of aliveness has its’ source in the body. If I could use one word to describe an actual experience of the body it would be awareness. This is another question that I struggled with. Phew!

Regards Mal

[Lon]

Hello Stacy

Can it be known how tall the body is? Does the body have weight or volume? In the actual experience does the body have a shape or form.

There appear to be no clear sensations indicating height, weight, shape or form in actual experience.

Is there a boundary between the body and clothing? Is there a boundary between body and chair?

The touch of clothing is felt on parts of the body but does not indicate a boundary. The chair is noticed under buttocks and thighs but this did not appear as a division.

Is there an inside or an outside? If there is an inside- the inside of what exactly?

From a sensations perspective, the boundary between inside and outside lacks definition or if it did I could not identify it although I know that there is an inside as doctors have probed in there and food and drink end up there too. I have a physical body covered in skin that keeps it all contained with this body. You probably know I am struggling with this question.

What does the word/label “body” Actually refer to? What is the actual experience of the body?

The physical body is real in that it is seen and felt. The senses that were noticed seem to register in the body. My whole sense of aliveness has its’ source in the body. If I could use one word to describe an actual experience of the body it would be awareness. This is another question that I struggled with. Phew!

This is the second try at sending this post. Regards Mal

[Anastacia42]

Good morning, Mal,

It posted both times, but the Quote highlighting was only there the first time.

Is there an inside or an outside? If there is an inside- the inside of what exactly?
From a sensations perspective, the boundary between inside and outside lacks definition or if it did I could not identify it although I know that there is an inside as doctors have probed in there and food and drink end up there too. I have a physical body covered in skin that keeps it all contained with this body. You probably know I am struggling with this question.

Yes. that's why I gave it to you. You're just believing some untrue thoughts. It's hard for you to accept that there's no more a body than there was an "apple." We did that one, right? "Body" is just a label. We made it all up.


What does the word/label “body” Actually refer to? What is the actual experience of the body?
The physical body is real in that it is seen and felt. The senses that were noticed seem to register in the body. My whole sense of aliveness has its’ source in the body. If I could use one word to describe an actual experience of the body it would be awareness. This is another question that I struggled with. Phew!

Nope."Real" is a slippery & meaningless label. Again, just like "apple."

You never answered what the Actual Experience" is. You have a list in green back there with the Colored Socks exercise. Those are the only replies that are AE.

There is awareness, yes, but what does it mean"has its source in body? " Really? Can you price that?


Go further with these & let me know what is found.

Loving,

[Lon]

Hello Stacy

Is there an inside- the inside of what exactly?

I am unable to find an inside of something now seen as not being a solid thing.

What does the word/label “body” actually refer to? What is the actual experience of the body?

After further investigation, the body was seen as not a solid thing. Revisiting the headless exercise revealed that there was spacious awareness in place of a body. The experience of the body is that of awareness.

There is awareness , yes but what does it mean to have its’ source in the body? Can you price that?

My previous post on this question was way off the mark. “I” am awareness and this awareness has no location that I could find. The awareness that “I” am is the same awareness that everything is. There is one(ness) awareness. I did not understand the “can you price that” question.

Regards Mal

[Anastacia42]

Hi Mal!

Yes, yes, yes!

I did not understand the “can you price that” question.

Well, that would be because "price" was a typo. I must confess I've been suffering from "vacation brain" this week. I'll be visiting my sister & her family at a South Carolina beach house beginning tomorrow. I'll have wifi & will still keep up. We'll see how much. :)

Anyway, the word was "find." Can you find that? But you got it. Not found. Yay!

One note of caution: Don't substitute "awareness" as some new version of a "self." It's not.

Allow the spaciousness that is arising.

Let's look at choice, control, decisions & such.

Palm Flipping Exercise

1. Hold a hand in front of you; palm turned down.

2. Now turn the palm up. And down...and up and so on.

Watch like a hawk.

Don't go to thoughts – examine your direct experience.

Do this as many times as you like, and each time inquire:

How is the movement controlled?

Does a thought control it?

Can a ‘controller’ of any description be located?

How is the decision made to turn the hand over? Track any decision point when a thought MADE THE DECISION to turn the hand over and the hand turns over immediately.

Who or what chose which hand - the left or right hand for the exercise?

Can you find a separate individual or anything that is choosing when to turn the palm up or down?

Loving,

[Lon]

Hello Stacy

How is this movement controlled?

The movement just seemed to happen. What started it and what stopped it is unclear.

Does a thought control it?

Thought gives the impression of control, but by paying close attention with no intrusive thinking, there is no thought control.

Can a controller of any description be located?

No, a controller could not be located.

How is the decision made to turn the hand over? Track any decision point when a thought MADE THE DECISION to turn the hand over and the hand turns immediately.

I don’t’ know. I searched for a decision point but none was evident, the activity simply happened.

Who or what chose which hand-the left or right hand for the exercise?

Either hand could have been engaged but the left hand performed the exercise. How the left hand volunteered for this mission is a mystery.

Can you find a separate individual or anything that is choosing when to turn the palm up or down?

No, a separate individual chooser was not evident in this exercise.

I hope you enjoy the time with your sister and if you want a break from posting, well that is fine with me.

Regards Mal

[Anastacia42]

Thank you, Mal, & good morning,

All true.

How does it feel to see that there is no "Mal," no controlling or deciding?


And honestly, this is what I do for fun.

Loving

[Lon]

Hello Stacy

How does it feel to see that there is no “Mal”, no controlling or deciding ?

What is being slowly revealed in terms of “feelings” is spaciousness. This is the most ”felt” of these revelations that are presently unfolding. Awareness, as “I” have glimpsed it, is vast, contains everything and has no boundaries and this is the spaciousness to which I refer.
There is a subtle feeling of lightness and aliveness now that “I” like Elvis, has left the building. Mal is not needed to decide or control the show and the show never needed Mal either, it will do just fine without him.
There is a feeling that all of this represents a beginning not an ending and in the fullness of time may turn out to be impermanent.
What was it like for you Stacy?

Warm Regards Mal

[Anastacia42]

Good morning!

There is a feeling that all of this represents a beginning not an ending and in the fullness of time may turn out to be impermanent.
What was it like for you Stacy?

Very much a beginning, not an end! Yes. Spaciousness.

If it seems to "slip" or "fade," look for the untrue thought that is causing tension & question it.

For me? Ha. I've had this awareness show up off & on my whole life. The longest, most intense SEEING happened during & for many weeks after the recorded IAM meditation workshop. I was a complete bliss bunny. Hit me like a ton of bricks & stayed with me until I got into a relationship & started some untrue thinking about my partner. That was ... hmmm... maybe a decade ago. Relationships are still challenging and I'm still working on it.

If I haven't yet shared the recording with you, I can. Send me an email address in the PM up there top right & I'll send it to you. Those are good, as are any pointers, to flip you into truth & seeing again.

So we have something called final questions here. I will run your answers by other guides and they will ask questions to make sure you are cooked. Do you feel ready to answer those?

Loving,

[Lon]

Hello Stacy

Do you feel ready to answer those?

Maybe there is a faint light shining through the cracks, but it sure doesn’t’ feel like the term “cooked” to me. However, cooked or under cooked, I would welcome questions from other guides if you feel the time is right for this to occur. Depending on the outcome of this questioning, what if anything happens next? By the way, thank you for sharing your clear seeing, it was really nice to read this.

Warm Regards Mal