Postby Tundra » Mon Sep 24, 2012 12:36 pm
1/
Me is a false idea stemming from the "obvious". The obvious being that everyone has one body, not 7 billion. The obvious being that "I'm the aggregate of my experiences and actions and holidays and crazy stories and that time I got drunk". This me is contained in the brain, and it guides what that person will do next from recalling the past (consciously or not). This idea of me breaks down under scrutiny. Taking away the belief that "I" am the causer of actions, the thinker of thoughts, rather than life simply happening, leads to knowing that if I can't, with all my might, consciously do anything or control which thought arises or anything else, then I never have done, ever. The self is separate insofar as each pair of eyes sees a different thing. I myself see storm clouds, eyes in hawaii will see a bright day. The impotence of the self to be doing anything other than looking out at the sky at that moment though reveals that the self is simply the angle from which you view the universe as present becomes past. We're seeing different angles, but with no-self, we're essentially seeing the same thing. (well, once the condtioning dissipates)
2/
It arises once defining concepts start coming up in life and that child can remember and internalize them. Some things will define the child by genetics ("I'm white"), some by experiences ("I am a good boy/I am good at painting in the lines!"). From there the life and self begins to build more, but it's all based in what happens to be. The praise or scorn and experience that shapes (to whatever extent) the self happens ("I'm scared of the ocean! why did my uncle give me "Jaws : don't go in the water!"?") without any control from the praising or scorning parties. Eventually the child has aversions and desires, over which they, like all others, had no control over getting.
Whether from causal chains or pretty much random events, things happen constantly. No human or animal yet discovered has any impact on ceasing randomness and causality. The self is a filter produced from events outside of any human control or agency, and yet we as a species strongly identify with the filter. It's like Stockholm syndrome. We are prodded by the flow of life, and yet we attribute it to myriad false things, such as "fate" (a distinctly guided form of causality can't exist without something that can guide it, right?) or the will of gods or "what goes around comes around" as a law of nature.
3/
It feels peaceful. If it were different then I'd be annoyed : "Ugh, I keep having to correct myself now!", but then it's just thoughts arising. As I said, "I'm catching myself" thinking that stuff now seemingly automatically. So yeah, it's peaceful. As most people will claim, "I don't like drama!" (of course most do for whatever reason), so I'll claim I was never too big into seeing drama, but now, how can you be into it? It seems more petty. But then, you acknowledge that it couldn't be otherwise right now. It'd be nice to have a world full of liberated people, but even if you could show this to people, I think they might be having to much of a rise from silly stuff. Case by case I suppose.
It also seems very strange. I'm not a long time seeker like many here, and to have stumbled on here seems unlikely. I suppose it had to happen.
4/
"So you're curious as to this whole no-self thing? Well, it turns out that your identity is simply based on a collection of events over which you never had control." (insert a test to show that you don't control your thoughts, such as "choose a color" I'm sure you're familiar with) "so you can see that, even when trying your damndest to have control over your choices, you cannot. They simply appear from below any control. There is some control, right? Well, let's test it. You have to test these things, you can't just be told it or tell yourself it. (question in the vein of your "Sit quietly, and notice what is real: body, furniture, feelings, thoughts, sensations, surroundings. Can you find an “I” here? Or are there just thoughts, feelings, sensations, images, sounds ?") "You can see that there are many things that are here to be observed and felt at the moment. Nerves and eyes and tongues still work as they will always do, they just get filtered through something that (hopefully) you can see isn't there."
5/
Can't say. Nothing pushed me since I didn't feel a moment. As you say, it was gradual. What happened was really a long and slow stroll through the gate. From nearly a year ago with messing around with concepts stemming from "my" lack of free will. I got comfortable with that, and it doesn't seem like a leap into the unknown many may get from this from a place I was just before I got here. Jed's first book (the only that I've read, I found truthstrike and here the day after reading) got me searching. His method seems a little open and vague compared to here. Once I was here, along with the book, I couldn't not keep looking. I knew it to be true, but I was "looking for no-santa". Damn invisible red jackets.
6/
I refers to the semantic I. I ate the slice of cake, Jim didn't. I can see the river, you (my blind friend) can't. It's a way to label something like anything else. I see the pretty gate on the website background. (or rather, the sight of the pretty gate arises in the moment but that's tedious!)
7/
This is like getting to the end of who wants to be a millionaire and the million dollar question is "who is the current president of the US?".
There's experience. I think these answers should have covered my understanding of the lack of experiencer. Let's hit it one more time, no asking the audience :
There's a label of I ("I'm eating the last slice of cake at the moment"), The cake's flavor arises in awareness. A view of a big dead spider inside the bitten cake arises. Disgust is felt. The action of heaving occurs. Others back away. Some thought arises depending on the prior events leading to this moment ("My boss is here, don't you dare throw up!"/"I read that spiders are eaten all over the world, it's ok!"/"oh god, this is so embarrassing!"/"how can I make this a joke and save face?") There's never been control over what lead to now, so the thought that arises was the one that was to arise. The thought drives actions and the actions drive reactions and so on.
