Calvin's journey to liberation

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Luchana
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby Luchana » Thu May 27, 2021 8:53 am

Hi Calvin,

you did a good looking.

I don't know. Maybe the same thing that sends the thoughts, and makes me breathe etc.
What is it?
Is this A thing?

Can this be touched?
Can this t be smelled?
Can this be seen?
Can this be heard
Can this be tasted?

Investigate :-)

Much love
Luchana
If you wonder what it’s like living nonduality in everyday life?
https://awakeningawakened.com/2022/10/2 ... onduality/

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calvinb
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby calvinb » Thu May 27, 2021 10:22 pm

Dear Luchana,

Thank you so much for your guidance :-).

What moves attention?
I don't know. Maybe the same thing that sends the thoughts, and makes me breathe etc.
What is it?
Is this A thing?
It is untracable/unfindable. It is not a thing, such as an object. It's a bit like the wind. You can see the effects of the wind, but you cannot see it or trace its origins.

Can this be touched?
Can this be smelled?
Can this be seen?
Can this be heard
Can this be tasted?
No, none of these. It's mysterious.


When I am sitting quietly, attention seemingly randomly moves. But it seems also that if there is an outside stimulation, that attention may move to, or not. There could be a sudden noise in the house, and then the attention would go to that, until it decides to move elsewhere. Or, for example, if you tell me to focus on the breath, then when this is read, the focus will be on the breath, until it isn't. There is no (personal) control over where the attention goes.


Have a great day.

love Calvin.

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Luchana
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby Luchana » Fri May 28, 2021 8:06 am

Hi Calvin,
No, none of these. It's mysterious.
We are looking at row reality, nothing mysterious here.

How can something which can't be touched, smelled, seen, heard, tasted do anything, anything at all?

When I am sitting quietly, attention seemingly randomly moves. But it seems also that if there is an outside stimulation, that attention may move to, or not. There could be a sudden noise in the house, and then the attention would go to that, until it decides to move elsewhere. Or, for example, if you tell me to focus on the breath, then when this is read, the focus will be on the breath, until it isn't. There is no (personal) control over where the attention goes.
Let's look at decision and choice and see how these are happening at experience.

Go and take two glasses with different beverages (milk and water, or juice and coke, or coffee and tea).
Put these glasses in front of you. Look at them and chose one.

As you do this notice whether a 'self' does it.
Also notice if there are many or any moments in the whole procedure of taking glasses, puting something in them (etc) when 'you' control the process?


How the decision is made which glass to choose?

Is there a moment of choice or it happens automatically?

Do ‘you’ choose?

Can a chooser be located?


Be very vigilant, do this as many times as it’s possible, look with curiosity,

Much love
Luchana
If you wonder what it’s like living nonduality in everyday life?
https://awakeningawakened.com/2022/10/2 ... onduality/

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calvinb
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby calvinb » Fri May 28, 2021 5:36 pm

Hello Luchana,
We are looking at row reality, nothing mysterious here.
Not sure what "row reality" means. But here, if it can't be explained, it's a mystery to me :-).

How can something which can't be touched, smelled, seen, heard, tasted do anything, anything at all?
Well the wind can't be touched, smelled, seen, heard, tasted etc. yet it blows the trees. But, I suppose there is no intention for it to do anything. It's doesn't say, hey, I'm going to blow the trees today. It just happens.

How the decision is made which glass to choose?

Is there a moment of choice or it happens automatically?

Do ‘you’ choose?

Can a chooser be located?
I did some tests today. For the most part there is no thinking process at all. Choices are made instantly, fluidly, and it is realised after (there is a thought) that a choice was made.

For one choice though, I could choose between tea and coffee. As I looked at the two options, a thought came "you have already had 3 coffees today, so maybe teas is better". So I had tea.

But in all cases, thought or no thought, I did not choose. The thought "I chose" came after, and also maybe a reason why I chose.

I am away on a birthday weekend this weekend, so I will play with this to deepen this looking, and find out if there is a chooser.

Have a lovely evening and weekend.

love Calvin.

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Luchana
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby Luchana » Sat May 29, 2021 10:37 am

Hi Calvin,
Not sure what "row reality" means. But here, if it can't be explained, it's a mystery to me :-).
ops, I mean RAW, sorry. English is not my native language and sometimes such a mistakes can happen,

So raw means what is here now directly experienced through 5 senses,

LOOKING is becoming aware of direct experience (DE). Noticing the raw experience of just colour, sound, smell, sensation and taste in the present moment, and noticing the labels and thoughts ABOUT the raw experience.

There is a HUGE difference between experience and thoughts ABOUT experience.

This is the difference between reality and fiction.
For the most part there is no thinking process at all. Choices are made instantly, fluidly, and it is realised after (there is a thought) that a choice was made.
Can it be said that's the choice happens automatically?
For one choice though, I could choose between tea and coffee. As I looked at the two options, a thought came "you have already had 3 coffees today, so maybe teas is better". So I had tea.
This sounds like logic :-)
But look:
Did you choose that particular thougth to appear?


Here is another exercise for you:

Please put some chocolate (or something you think you shouldn’t eat or drink) in front of you. Look at it. Inspect it closely. Smell its delicious fragrance. And pay attention to emerging desire to eat it.

When the desire is there, pay close attention to the thought process.
See how thoughts list pros and cons why you should or shouldn’t eat the chocolate.
These opposing thoughts might even try to argue or convince each other what to decide.

What is it that is considering these options?
Is there anything that is listing the pros and cons, or only just thoughts appear about pros and cons? – look very carefully

Now, make a decision, but whatever you decide, don’t eat the chocolate (yet). Rather just pay very close attention when the decision is made. Particularly pay attention to thoughts, as the decision is made.

Let’s say a thought appear: “I decided not to eat the chocolate”
So the thought about the decision just appeared.
What made that thought to appear?
Can you find the thing that made that decision, apart from the presence of the thought about the decision?
How exactly the decision is made?


Now, act according to the decision. (Either eat or don’t eat the chocolate.)

What is it that performed the chosen action?

I am away on a birthday weekend this weekend, so I will play with this to deepen this looking, and find out if there is a chooser.
Have fun and reply when it's possible.
I would like to ask you to look very carefully at the questions. Also reply each question one by one and dont' bulk the reply. there is a reason I gave the questions like this.

Much love
Luchana
If you wonder what it’s like living nonduality in everyday life?
https://awakeningawakened.com/2022/10/2 ... onduality/

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calvinb
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby calvinb » Mon May 31, 2021 8:04 am

Dear Luchana,

ops, I mean RAW, sorry. English is not my native language and sometimes such a mistakes can happen
Ah ok, no worries. I understand, I make mistakes in French all the time. Your English is very good :-).

There is a HUGE difference between experience and thoughts ABOUT experience.
I'm getting a feel for this. It's a big difference. DE is clear and here. Thoughts are fuzzy and messy and only describe what has happned, not what is happening. Thoughts are always a step behind DE, what's going on is right now.

Can it be said that's the choice happens automatically?
Yes, that's exactly what happens. But a thought can come in and comment about the choice.

Did you choose that particular thougth to appear?
Nope. Thoughts are not chosen.

What is it that is considering these options?
Just thoughts arising with options.

Is there anything that is listing the pros and cons, or only just thoughts appear about pros and cons? – look very carefully
There are only pros and cons arising, continually going back and forth.

Let’s say a thought appear: “I decided not to eat the chocolate”
So the thought about the decision just appeared.
What made that thought appear?
It just happened. Nobody made it appear.

Can you find the thing that made that decision, apart from the presence of the thought about the decision?
No I can't. There is a thought, I made that decision. But the decision-maker can't be found.

How exactly is the decision made?
It's not sure. It seems to be the strongest thought that becomes the decision. When I did the exercise, there was a thought, "not eating is better", there was a relaxation into that thought, and then it was decided. No further thoughts arose. However, with me, this is not always the case. Even after decision is made, there can be after-thougts that question the decision, and it can last for a long time.

What is it that performed the chosen action?
This just happened, in this case, not eating. If the decision was to eat, then the chocolate would have just been popped into the mouth, no thought, no doer. It's weird that an "I" thought claims to do this.

Also reply each question one by one and dont' bulk the reply.
Ok, agreed :-).


Have a lovely day.

love Calvin

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Luchana
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby Luchana » Mon May 31, 2021 8:53 pm

Hi Calvin,
I'm getting a feel for this. It's a big difference. DE is clear and here. Thoughts are fuzzy and messy and only describe what has happned, not what is happening. Thoughts are always a step behind DE, what's going on is right now.
Exactly. Thoughts came almost immediately after the experience.

Can it be said that the choice happens automatically?
Yes, that's exactly what happens. But a thought can come in and comment about the choice.
What IS NOT happen automatically?

Is there an expectation that thoughts should stop appearing and doing its thing? e.g commenting a choice?
Why should they?


Just because the mirage in the desert has been seen for what it is - a mirage in a desert, this doesn't mean it will stop appearing.

You did a very good looking with the exercise.
Let's see this:

However, with me, this is not always the case. Even after decision is made, there can be after-thougts that question the decision, and it can last for a long time.
Can you find the thing that question that decision, apart from the presence of the thought about questioning the decision?


Much love,
Luchana
If you wonder what it’s like living nonduality in everyday life?
https://awakeningawakened.com/2022/10/2 ... onduality/

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calvinb
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby calvinb » Mon May 31, 2021 10:18 pm

Dear Luchana,

Thank you so much for your reply.
What IS NOT happen automatically?
I love this question. I can't find anything that is not happening automatically. Nature is functioning completely automatically, plants growing, rain, rivers flowing, and we are nature doing the same; the body doing its thing, the five senses don't need an "I" to function. Thoughts also arise and dissolve automatically. Then the personality arises as words and actions, but without the need of a person. You could say that man can cause things to happen, but even that's not true because there is no "person" that does anything. The being's actions come from personality and conditioning. There's no "I" who decides to do something, as seen before. This is great. I will keep looking...

Is there an expectation that thoughts should stop appearing and doing its thing? e.g commenting a choice?
It would be nice if they did stop appearing, but my exerience is that they never do. I would like for decisions to become easier, so fewer after thoughts would help, but that's not going to happen.

Why should they?
I once knew a man who had spent a year sitting and stopping thoughts and he managed to stop them altogether, so he said. But the natural funtioning of thoughts seems to be to rise constantly. No reason for them to stop. But ironically, a thought may arise that wishes for thoughts to stop.

Can you find the thing that question that decision, apart from the presence of the thought about questioning the decision?
No. It's just more thought(s) that arise(s). Behind the thoughts there is silence.


Thank you once again.


love Calvin.

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Luchana
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby Luchana » Tue Jun 01, 2021 1:24 pm

Hi Calvin,
I love this question. I can't find anything that is not happening automatically. Nature is functioning completely automatically, plants growing, rain, rivers flowing, and we are nature doing the same; the body doing its thing, the five senses don't need an "I" to function. Thoughts also arise and dissolve automatically. Then the personality arises as words and actions, but without the need of a person. You could say that man can cause things to happen, but even that's not true because there is no "person" that does anything. The being's actions come from personality and conditioning. There's no "I" who decides to do something, as seen before. This is great. I will keep looking...
Beautiful.
But ironically, a thought may arise that wishes for thoughts to stop.
:-) Yes, all kind of thoughts may or may not arise. We are looking at experience to see IF a arrising or subsiding is something that we do.

For the next exercise you don't need to sit and examine, but stand up and walk.
Just stand up and start walking. Аt every step investigate:

What mooves the legs?

Is there a controller that controls walking, or is there just walking?


Also as you move around in your normal activities, check and see if you can find a self moving the body around. Walking, driving, typing, dressing yourself, etc. Is there a WHO living your life? Or are there just thoughts about everything, including a self, seeming to live your life?Just look at the evidence. In your daily life, in all your actions, keep returning to this focus on the thoughts as you move around. Keep checking if there is something real, besides a thought, that owns and directs the body.

Have fun :-)

Much love
Luchana
If you wonder what it’s like living nonduality in everyday life?
https://awakeningawakened.com/2022/10/2 ... onduality/

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calvinb
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby calvinb » Thu Jun 03, 2021 12:14 pm

Dear Luchana,
What mooves the legs?
The legs move seemingly on their own. Of course the brain is directing the mussels etc., but it is not deciding how or where they move.

Is there a controller that controls walking, or is there just walking?
Again, walking is seen to be happening, like typing is happening right now. A thought will try to steal the show and say "I'm doing this", but a thought can't do anything.

Is there a WHO living your life? Or are there just thoughts about everything, including a self, seeming to live your life?
This is an ongoing investigation that I am doing in my daily life. Sometimes it is clearer than others. But generally it is seen that stuff happens, walking, driving, etc. and throughts describe what's happening or claim to be the doer. There is a gradual seeing through this. It's a fascinating exploration.

Thank you.

love Calvin.

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Luchana
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby Luchana » Fri Jun 04, 2021 9:14 am

Hi Calvin,
The legs move seemingly on their own. Of course the brain is directing the mussels etc., but it is not deciding how or where they move.
What is the experience of "brain directing the mussels"?

Can it really be observed brain directing the mussels?

Again, walking is seen to be happening, like typing is happening right now. A thought will try to steal the show and say "I'm doing this", but a thought can't do anything.
Exactly.
So thought can't do anything.

What is "brain directiong the mussels" than?

Isn't it just another thought claiming that things are this way or that way?

This is an ongoing investigation that I am doing in my daily life. Sometimes it is clearer than others. But generally it is seen that stuff happens, walking, driving, etc. and throughts describe what's happening or claim to be the doer. There is a gradual seeing through this. It's a fascinating exploration.
it is.. :-)
Keep like this - in different situations during the day.


Much love
Luchana
If you wonder what it’s like living nonduality in everyday life?
https://awakeningawakened.com/2022/10/2 ... onduality/

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calvinb
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby calvinb » Sat Jun 05, 2021 11:28 pm

Dear Luchana,
What is the experience of "brain directing the mussels"?
None. There is no experiencing of the brain doing anything. This is learnt knowledge.

Can it really be observed brain directing the mussels?
Not at all.

What is "brain directiong the mussels" than?
This is just learnt knowledge.

Isn't it just another thought claiming that things are this way or that way?
Exactly.


Thank you for these powerful exercises. I look forward to my next challenge.


love Calvin

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Luchana
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby Luchana » Sun Jun 06, 2021 7:08 am

Hi Calvin,

you did a very good lookig.

So things happen by themselves and thoughts are creating a story almost immediately?

Can you clearly see this?


What I would suggest is one day or two to go for a walk somewhere in nature. A small park nearby is a good option also. Walk for a while, sit somewhere and look arround. Trees, flowers, insects, birds, people's chatters, children's playing, sensations in the body, thoughts including the thought of I, Calvin am sitting, looking and observing- all this is just one happening.
Look at experience and answer these questions:

What is not just a happening?

Can the character chooses what to feel, what to think, whether go for a walk or not?

Does the character choose this story?

Can it chooses another story, a different one, instead of what already is?

Can the story of Calvin be seen as what it is - just a story, including Calvin?



Much love
Luchana
If you wonder what it’s like living nonduality in everyday life?
https://awakeningawakened.com/2022/10/2 ... onduality/

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calvinb
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby calvinb » Mon Jun 07, 2021 10:05 pm

Dear Luchana,

So things happen by themselves and thoughts are creating a story almost immediately?

Can you clearly see this?
Yes, I can see this. Clearly? It's coming.


I had some nice walks in the park :-).

What is not just a happening?
Nothing. It's all just happening, now.

Can the character choose what to feel, what to think, whether go for a walk or not?
It's an after-thought that says that an "I" has chosen to do something.

Can it chooses another story, a different one, instead of what already is?
It seems not, no. The story arises. There can arise the thought of wanting a different story.

Can the story of Calvin be seen as what it is - just a story, including Calvin?
Yes, this has been seen repeatedly. There is all that is happening now, including the thoughts, and there is the story of Calvin, that arises as thoughts right now. This is a powerful seeing; that the story of Calvin can only arise in this moment, even though it can seem big and real and in time.

With thanks and appreciation.

love Calvin.

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Luchana
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Re: Calvin's journey to liberation

Postby Luchana » Tue Jun 08, 2021 2:33 pm

Hi Calvin,
Nothing. It's all just happening, now.
What about Calvin?

Is Calvin part of this happening as well?

Is there anything apart from now?


It seems not, no. The story arises. There can arise the thought of wanting a different story.


Is it possible the arising of thought wanting a different story to make another story?

Is it possible for Batman to choose a different story, than the story which already is?

Is it possoble that Batman decide to be a Darth Vader for example?




Much love
Luchana
If you wonder what it’s like living nonduality in everyday life?
https://awakeningawakened.com/2022/10/2 ... onduality/


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