Wake Me Up so I never fall asleep well

[David Finlayson]

The experience is as it is. However the me feels that it is experiencing it,

You are not „looking“ here in direct experience. If „me“ is just a thought, how can thought feel?
It can't. It is still just another thought: me is feeling…
Story is going on it its own. Just notice. There are sensations and there are thoughts about sensation.
Is there anything outside of the experience having it?
Is there inside and outside of the experience?

With Love.

Yes it is seen when looking that the feelings are not mine, that the "mine" is just an illusion or idea, and feelings are labels given to sensations which taken to have some meaning beyond the sensation by the false I, a story is attributed to have caused the sensations/ feelings which may have a sort of relative connection and may exacerbate the feeling or sensation by giving attention to it, the story that is.

There is nothing in the sense of an I having the experience. Space or awareness is within, without and through the experience.

With love

David

[Eloratea]

Hey David,

when you make decision, who is making them? :)
How that happens?
And who is communicating with who now?

Be well.

[David Finlayson]

Hey David,

when you make decision, who is making them? :)
How that happens?
And who is communicating with who now?

Be well.

Hi Eloratea,

Decisions occur spontaneously, the I tells a story about it making them or not.

There cannot be a who communicating with another who, if the whos don't exist? Communication arises, it is a play of consciousness relating to direct experience, or an exchange of thoughts. There is a sense of no I.

The thought comes in that this is just another mental construct, a trick of the mind. There is a sense of connection though and a vibrant stillness.

Thank you,

David

[Eloratea]

David,

do you feel ready for the kind of final questions?
Do you feel a perceptual shift; that seeing happened?
Or there are still some doubts, feeling of not being "there", anything you would like to look at deeper now?

Love.

[David Finlayson]

Hi Eloratea,

David,

do you feel ready for the kind of final questions?
Do you feel a perceptual shift; that seeing happened?
Or there are still some doubts, feeling of not being "there", anything you would like to look at deeper now?

Love.

I have felt shifts and that seeing is occurring at times, there is some doubt also, yes a feeling of not being total in that seeing, the sense of losing awareness of it at times.

However the doubt holds no significance, and yes I am ready or there is a readyness.

Love

David

[Eloratea]

Hey David,

Whatever arises in experience, arises. Thoughts, sensations, also doubts. It is good to notice it and see does that happen to someone or it just arises in the experience.
Thoughts about self and some old conditioning usually stays after initial seeing. But constant, deep looking dissolves it.

Hear are the questions.

• Is there a 'me', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
  
  What the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works?
  
  How does it feel to see this?
  
  What was the last bit that "pushed you over" and made you see through the illusion of self?

Answer in detail and honestly.

Much Love.

[David Finlayson]

Hey David,

Whatever arises in experience, arises. Thoughts, sensations, also doubts. It is good to notice it and see does that happen to someone or it just arises in the experience.
Thoughts about self and some old conditioning usually stays after initial seeing. But constant, deep looking dissolves it.

Hear are the questions.

• Is there a 'me', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
  
  No, there are thoughts and patterns taken to be a me, by that root thought pattern of a me.
  
  What the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works?
  
  It is a thought, it starts there or even before the thought is formed, then other thoughts form in relation to this original ignorance, creating a matrix of feelings, characteristics all viewed as something related to a me, a false individuation.
  
  How does it feel to see this?
  
  Liberating and re-orientating; then this false self attempts to introduce doubt, it appears to have a life of its own. There is restedness, simplicity, nothing unusual, the me isn't sure that it's got it, to that false me, this should be more of an experience, something to exalt the senses, or so it thinks.
  
  What was the last bit that "pushed you over" and made you see through the illusion of self?

I'm not sure I am over the edge, I still feel identified with thoughts and feelings, not able to distinguish this false identification with a me or an I as a constant seeing.

In life it has been occassioned by
extreme experiences, near accidents
devotion
guidance/ pointing by yourself and other teachers
love and doing what I love
riding motorbikes
running
pain
beauty & nature

The pointing by a teacher turning awareness back on itself, expanding within, caused the me to dissappear entirely for some days

This may not have been what you were asking.

Let me know what further detail I can give or where I am not being fully honest in your view.

Much Love.

Many thanks,

David

[Eloratea]

I'm not sure I am over the edge, I still feel identified with thoughts and feelings, not able to distinguish this false identification with a me or an I as a constant seeing.

Identification happens, also for some time after seeing the „I“ is just a thought. Brain can't be re-programed all at once. There will take some time and let go of imaginary control and surrendering to life, to awareness.
But let's look a bit deeper at this right now.
How this identification happens? Isn't it also just a thought in awareness.
Is there still unconditional belief in thoughts?

[David Finlayson]

Identification happens, also for some time after seeing the „I“ is just a thought. Brain can't be re-programed all at once. There will take some time and let go of imaginary control and surrendering to life, to awareness.
But let's look a bit deeper at this right now.

How this identification happens?

Isn't it also just a thought in awareness.

Identification happens by belief in a me, or a thought like that, fear surrounds that by thoughts that this me can make mistakes or be harmed, self concern etc. It is just thoughts in awareness, however such thoughts/ resultant feelings are sometimes taken as reality when I am not conscious of this fact, i.e. I believe myself to be a me identity

Is there still unconditional belief in thoughts?

[/quote]

No, thoughts are only relevant to the conditioned states, there is not a need for belief in anything. The term unconditional belief throws me a little, can there be an unconditional belief.

Warm regards


David

[Eloratea]

It is just thoughts in awareness, however such thoughts/ resultant feelings are sometimes taken as reality when I am not conscious of this fact, i.e. I believe myself to be a me identity

Is that a problem?

By unconditional belief I mean accepting content of the thoughts to be true without questioning it.
Look deeper is there "you", an entity that identifies with thoughts and feelings? Or how it happens?

[David Finlayson]

It is just thoughts in awareness, however such thoughts/ resultant feelings are sometimes taken as reality when I am not conscious of this fact, i.e. I believe myself to be a me identity

Is that a problem?

In those moments when there is forgetfullness, yes it is believed there is a problem by something that doesn't really exist, in truth though no, no problem.

By unconditional belief I mean accepting content of the thoughts to be true without questioning it.
Look deeper is there "you", an entity that identifies with thoughts and feelings? Or how it happens?

I am continually reminding myself (I realise the contradication there as myself doesn't really exist) of the truth that I the me has no reality. This is the root of the false, where all thoughts spring from, well most thoughts spring from, it is only when thoughts are taken to have some meaning to this false self that they seem to bind or take me out of my true centre of just seeing them for what they are. This allows a false world or reality to be created, appearing to create a veil between or filter to what is actually there.

Thanks

David

[Eloratea]

Do you exist, David?

[David Finlayson]

Do you exist, David?

No, although the name is a label for this body/ mind. There is no being called David its just a name for ease of identification, the stories/ beliefs/ attitudes have no substance nor relationship to this label, nor substance in reality. If David does not exist does the world cease to exist? Does anything exist as an separate thing or entity?

[Eloratea]

What says your direct experience, what is world, what is separate right now?

:)

[David Finlayson]

What says your direct experience, what is world, what is separate right now?

:)

There is sense perception, hands on keyboard, drink tea, taste, eat chocolate. It all just happens, there is a sense of things being insubstantial, kind of like watching a movie but with no separate watcher. The world seems real and unreal at the same time, the world beyond direct experience does not exist, and even as directly experienced lacks any substance.