Curious

[Rosalind]

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
That the belief in a separate self is not true and the guide will explore this with you.

What are you looking for at LU?
I would like to o see through the seperate self experientially. I have a firm belief that the seperate self does not exist but there is still a feeling of a sense of self at the moment. There is also a lot of seeking still too.

What do you expect from a guided conversation?
I expect that a person who has seen through the belief in the seperate self will ask questions for me to explore in my own experience so that I can see that the seperate self is an illusion. The guide will know which direction to point to uncover beliefs and thoughts.

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
Two peak experiences 20/17 years ago before any searching. Then exploration of psychology, quantum physics, self help, 3 principles. About 3 years ago came across nonduality and seeking intensified. Have done two week long residential retreats with Rupert Spira. I did 18 weeks Finders course with Jeffery Martin. Spend most of my time reading, watching videos etc about waking up.

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self?
11

[s-p-a-c-e]

Hi Rosalind,

Nice to meet you. We could explore this together if you'd like, see what comes about.

Just let me know, and we'll set off. :)

With best wishes,
John

[GeordieGirl]

Hi John,

My apologies for the delay, I missed the message. I'd be very grateful to explore with you.

I look forward to hearing from you.
Best wishes
Nic

[s-p-a-c-e]

Hi Nic,

I see this is a different username - GeordieGirl/Rosalind - do you have two accounts?

Thanks,
John

[GeordieGirl]

Hi John,

Yes I can see it has linked the accounts even though I have a new email address. I tried earlier in the year but it didn't work out. I thought I'd registered that account with my old email address which got hacked. Perhaps I already had the new email address, so sorry for the confusion! If both are using my new email address I can continue with either account. If possible I would like to continue with you as my guide?
Apologies again for any confusion.
Best wishes
Nic

[s-p-a-c-e]

Hi Nic,

No worries, it'll be fine. :)

You mentioned, "a firm belief that the separate self does not exist but there is still a feeling of a sense of self at the moment."

So, there is a feeling that you're calling a sense of self.

What happens to the feeling when you drop that name?

With best wishes,
John

[GeordieGirl]

Hi John,

That's great, thanks! And we're off...

You mentioned, "a firm belief that the separate self does not exist but there is still a feeling of a sense of self at the moment."

So, there is a feeling that you're calling a sense of self.

What happens to the feeling when you drop that name?

Yes, you are right I am labeling that feeling as a sense of self. With that name, I take it for granted that the feeling points to an actual sense of self that isn't questioned. Without the name when I look for the sense of self I can't find it. I notice thoughts searching and some sensation of frustration arising.
Thanks
N

[s-p-a-c-e]

Yes, you are right I am labeling that feeling as a sense of self. With that name, I take it for granted that the feeling points to an actual sense of self that isn't questioned. Without the name when I look for the sense of self I can't find it. I notice thoughts searching and some sensation of frustration arising.

Great.
Ok, for now, let's not do the whole looking for a sense of self and not finding it thing.

Let's get back to the feeling, which is busy being a feeling - at least when you notice it.

Sit with this feeling, nothing special, a feeling like all the other feelings.
Sit for a moment with the feeling, purely as a feeling.

As it's a feeling, feel it. It has no name, nor needs one.

Breathe in and out with the feeling.

Ta,
John

[GeordieGirl]

Hi John,

Sit with this feeling, nothing special, a feeling like all the other feelings.
Sit for a moment with the feeling, purely as a feeling.

As it's a feeling, feel it. It has no name, nor needs one.

Breathe in and out with the feeling.

Thank you for this pointing. This is such a helpful direction for me away from the mind trap. Being with the feeling felt like the opposite of seeking.

Regards
Nic

[s-p-a-c-e]

Hiya Nic,

Thank you for this pointing. This is such a helpful direction for me away from the mind trap. Being with the feeling felt like the opposite of seeking.

Oh good! It's the simplest things that are often over-looked.

When this regular feeling is just that, a regular feeling, with no name, no nothing other than what it is, what happens to the idea of 'Nic' then? Where does it go with no feeling to land on?

With best wishes,
John

[GeordieGirl]

Morning John,

When this regular feeling is just that, a regular feeling, with no name, no nothing other than what it is, what happens to the idea of 'Nic' then? Where does it go with no feeling to land on?

Without the automatic assumption the feeling is Nicky, there is more openness and curiosity. The Nicky idea doesn't stick or feel so solid. The idea passes.

Thank you
Nic

[s-p-a-c-e]

Hi Nic,

Without the automatic assumption the feeling is Nicky, there is more openness and curiosity. The Nicky idea doesn't stick or feel so solid. The idea passes.

And who are you when the idea of Nic goes?
What's left?


With best wishes,
John

[GeordieGirl]

Hi John,

And who are you when the idea of Nic goes?
What's left?

This has been quite tough. I not sure if I know in my experience or if I'm just spouting non dual beliefs I've picked up. When the idea of Nic goes it doesn't feel like a who, it feels difficult to describe because it has no content. Space isn't quite right but something like that, an openness. What's left is from that sense of spaciousness a body doing whatever it does, thoughts, feelings and sensations arising and falling away. Life living I guess.

Thanks
Nic

[s-p-a-c-e]

Hi Nic,

Let's be honest, whilst you like the idea of self-inquiry, you resist where it might lead.

Have you explored this?

John

[GeordieGirl]

Hi John,

I trust you know what you are talking about.

Let's be honest, whilst you like the idea of self-inquiry, you resist where it might lead.

Have you explored this?

What makes you say this? What's the way to move forward with this?

Many thanks
Nic