Me vs. Reality

[mesmer]

When resistance to a situation arises... the “sense of me” asserts itself with greater strength.
One of the other guides asked for some clarification at this statement. Can the sense of self become strong or weak? What are your thoughts on that?

There is seeing of how the sense of illusory self, or belief in a self has been maintained particularly when suffering ( eg. resistance to a situation ) arises. When seeing the suffering of a family member with illness, there is a feeling of resistance to the situation as a habitual reaction.

Resistance to what is occurring takes the form of “I” thoughts arising... “I can’t accept this”... “l want this to end”... etc.

So to clarify, instead of saying “When resistance to a situation arises, the “sense of me” asserts itself with greater strength”....it would be more accurate to say these “l” thoughts and the accompanying emotions, become more apparent when suffering/resistance arises in experience.

The felt resistance is recognized as a habitual reaction. The labeling of emotions, events as being good , bad etc. is also recognized.

There is no entity of “self” at work that can assert itself in varying degrees of strength.

[mesmer]

At this moment the seeing of no self, does not mean the end of suffering. Suffering is occurring. The pain/ difficulty of witnessing the suffering of a loved one can’t be overstated. The relationship to the suffering has changed. It is still felt. There is a lessening of the pain because the relationship to it is less personal. Can the relationship to suffering be completely seen as no longer personal? Intellectually... yes. Experientially.... that is something that remains to be seen.

[mesmer]

Part of this process is seeing that there has been self identification attached to unpleasant emotion and the expectation that seeing “no self” would bring about relief from suffering is unrealistic.

[Florisness]

Hi mesmer,

I think your answers are great, quite some new understandings that happened in barely 2 months time! Your name turned blue as you can see. Perhaps you also received a pm, or if not will receive it one of these days. There will be an invitation to a Facebook group, so you could join that if you like and look around. I once made use of the opportunity to join the 'inquiry into the 10 fetters' group, where I did some further valuable inquiry. But of course, you can do what you wish, and nothing you can't figure out on your own if you wish.

Anyway, I very much appreciate the conversation I had with you and wish you all the peace and love you desire,
Floris

[mesmer]

Your guidance has been invaluable Floris. Thank you for such kindness, patience, humour and wisdom. The greatest gift. Eternally grateful.