Clarity

[Plant31]

Thanks Sioned.
Good luck with the move.

I’m finding that I can be aware of sensations and thoughts at the same time but they have less dominance and there is more space and emptiness. Flowing freely.

I’ve been feeling a lot of sadness recently. It’s hard to know whether to believe the stories and attempt to make changes (although I know there is no one in charge) or just feel the pain and let the thoughts pass. I’ve been doing the latter. Do you have a view on this?

Thanks Sioned. I know you won’t be able to respond for a few days. Best wishes xx



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[Seamist]

HI Becca

Is it possible to look at both thought and sensation at the same time to balance the scales? In a way but they are then out of focus and not getting full attention. It’s like they are on the periphery of awareness. So maybe the answer would be no they can’t be looked at properly at the same time. It’s a tricky one as it’s not the direct experience so I’m just guessing rather than speaking from experience. Struggled a bit with this one.

You've answered the question here when you say:In a way but they are then out of focus and not getting full attention. That is, yes, it's SORT-OF possible, but only if your awareness of each is fuzzy

I’ve been feeling a lot of sadness recently. It’s hard to know whether to believe the stories and attempt to make changes (although I know there is no one in charge) or just feel the pain and let the thoughts pass. I’ve been doing the latter. Do you have a view on this?

Well ... my view is that life goes on, even when we have seen through the illusion of the self. I've just moved from a house I found small and cramped to one that is much bigger, for instance - do you see what I mean? I didn't just decide that it didn't matter and stay where I was.

I'm wondering whether you need to address this sadness that seems to recur for you?
sending love
Sioned

[Plant31]

Thanks Sioned.

Yes, I sat with the feelings of sadness and allowed it to flow and be felt without any distractions. It has passed now and there are some big decisions and changes that are arising so things feel like they are moving forward.
I’m sure there was some strong planetary stuff happening as well as it seemed to be an intense month emotionally. Thank you for your support.

I do now recognise that life still carries on and feelings and thoughts still arise as they did before. My expectations and perspective has definitely shifted on this point and it feels like this understanding is continuing to deepen. I am hearing teachings in a different light now.

I hope you are getting settled and enjoying your new space. x x


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[Plant31]

[That is, yes, it's SORT-OF possible, but only if your awareness of each is fuzzy]

I know what you mean about the two scales being fuzzy. There is less focus on each of these aspects. I’m going to look into this further from direct experience. Thank you x



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[Seamist]

Great. You're doing really well xx xx

[Seamist]

Hi Becca
How are you doing? It seems a while since I heard from you... hope you're ok xx

[Plant31]

Hi Sioned, yes I am doing ok thank you. Hope you are settled in your new home.

I feel like I see clearly that there is no separate self. However, there are still thoughts arising of a separate self. I guess this is ok as long as I know the true nature of them.

I’ve also been listening to a non duality talk that talks about awareness becoming more dominant and I still have desires for this to be my experience. Yet I know awareness and direct experience are inseparable.

Otherwise I feel an underlying ‘okay-ness’ that everything will always be ok. Which is beautiful in itself.

Do you think we should carry on with the exercises?

x


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[Seamist]

Hi Becca
I'm loving my new home, thanks.
And good to hear that you're ok.

Do you think we should carry on with the exercises?

I'm not sure, actually. It may be that you have done what you can here - and it sounds like you are now following up this type of inquiry via other routes - and that's all fine with me. So I'm inclined to say up to you.....
xxx

[Plant31]

So happy for you in your new home.

It would be good to carry on for a little bit but mainly because I was hoping for a bigger breakthrough than what has happened. So if that’s not the right reason as it’s just the illusion of thought then maybe I am done here. I’d like to answer some more questions if you don’t mind.

Thank you so much for all your guidance and support. Much love


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[Seamist]

Hi Becca
Let's do that, then...
There is a general assumption that there is linear time that started (if started at all) somewhere very far in the past and advances to the distant future. The present moment (now) is considered to be a very small fragment of time, or an event that is moving forward on a linear line, coming from the past and advancing to the future.
But is there an experience of the ’now’ moving along the line of time?
Any experience of one ‘moment’ giving way to the next?
Is there any actual or direct experience of one event following another?
How fast is the ‘present moment’ actually moving?
Just look at 'this moment', can you find a point where it began?
long does the ‘now’ last?
Where does the ‘now’ start, and where does it end?
When does the ‘now’ exactly become the 'past'?
What is the ‘past’ in actual experience?
So is there actual experience of ‘time’ or thoughts about ‘time’?

xx

[Plant31]

But is there an experience of the ’now’ moving along the line of time?
No, there is only ever now. This moment. This blows my mind too. The fact that there is only ever NOW! But what was the moment that appears to be a moment ago? This would appear to just be thought of a past. Does that mean that memories are not real as they are just thought? I’m not sure I understand how memories work.


Any experience of one ‘moment’ giving way to the next?
That’s how it appears but when you look closely there is only ever now. Right now.

Is there any actual or direct experience of one event following another? No, not at all I can only find direct experience of now.

How fast is the ‘present moment’ actually moving?
It’s not moving.

Just look at 'this moment', can you find a point where it began?
No, there is no beginning.


How long does the ‘now’ last?
Infinity. It feels like there is no end.


Where does the ‘now’ start, and where does it end?
In this moment, the moment is continuous or so it seems but without a beginning or end.


When does the ‘now’ exactly become the 'past'?
This is an interesting one that is confusing. I was eating chocolate earlier in the now and now the chocolate has gone I have a memory of a direct experience of eating the chocolate. I need help with this one.


What is the ‘past’ in actual experience?
So is there actual experience of ‘time’ or thoughts about ‘time’?
Just thoughts of time. There is only ever the now. So the past is just another thought. But what about when the ‘past’ was the now?

This one is fascinating... xx


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[Seamist]

Hi Becca
Good exploring from you once again.

Does that mean that memories are not real as they are just thought?

they are thoughts, yes.

Can a "now" actually be found?
xx

[Plant31]

No, nothing can be found apart from direct experience and an awareness of this. Even the awareness cannot be found. X


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[Seamist]

Well spotted, Becca
This next one follows up well - and you may feel that you have already answered it - have a look, though.
Almost everybody believes that a memory thought is referring to something that has happened. That a memory thought is a different thought than a non-memory thought.
Please don’t go to thought explanations, but just let a memory be there, and look at it. Look at what is actually going on and not what thoughts say - but what actually is.
What is memory exactly?
What is the memory ‘made of’?
WHEN does the memory appear?
What is the exact difference between a ‘general’ thought and a ‘memory’ thought?
How is it known EXACTLY that a ‘memory’ thought refers to something that has happened?
Then, look at a thought about the future.
What is the future thought ‘made of’?
WHEN does the future thought appear?
What is the exact difference between a ‘general’ thought and a ‘future’ thought?
How is it known EXACTLY that a ‘future’ thought refers to something that will happen?
Then let’s compare a thought about past and a thought about the future.
What is the EXACT difference between the thoughts about past and future?
If there is difference and how is that difference is known exactly?

xx

[Plant31]

Sorry for the delay, I thought I’d answered this post then realised I hadn’t!

What is memory exactly? It’s a thought.
What is the memory ‘made of’? The same substance as thought, ungraspable.

WHEN does the memory appear? In the present moment and after the event. Can appear at random like thoughts.

What is the exact difference between a ‘general’ thought and a ‘memory’ thought? Nothing.

How is it known EXACTLY that a ‘memory’ thought refers to something that has happened? This is an interesting question. In my experience there is a clear image of part of the memory whereas in imagination/thought it’s not as clear as it’s imagined and not actually happened. But both images of the past and thoughts of the future are the same quality. Sometimes I can’t remember if thoughts are real and they actually happened to me or if it was a story about someone else.


Then, look at a thought about the future.
What is the future thought ‘made of’? Imagination. Same quality of memories.
WHEN does the future thought appear? When you think about something that might happen. Randomly.
What is the exact difference between a ‘general’ thought and a ‘future’ thought? No difference.
How is it known EXACTLY that a ‘future’ thought refers to something that will happen? It’s not known. A future thought more than likely won’t happen as you can’t think up the future before it happens.
Then let’s compare a thought about past and a thought about the future.
What is the EXACT difference between the thoughts about past and future? They are the same but the past thought seems to have more of a knowing that it happened as it is remembered.
If there is difference and how is that difference is known exactly? It’s only known by more thought and evidence of something actually taking place like a joint experience. Or a full tummy if it was a memory of eating. But mainly it’s only known by thought. This is a bit confusing because if it’s only known by thought and thought isn’t real then did it really happen if there is only ever this moment. I might be getting myself lost here.
Thanks Sioned x



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