Understanding

[anigeka]

Hi, Marcin!

Can you reproduce this sense of contraction by recalling or imagining one situation that has caused (causes) it and please take a look at how it is related to "me"? Please describe the sensation as it is and what is its relation with "me". Please try to be as brief and clear as possible in this description and try to stick just to what it actually is, eg. please try to filter out what some mental images might say about how the sensation happens.

There is no "me" there even during a contraction. That's also a mental image. In fact, I can't find a "me" anywhere. And it could never have been there, as my raw experience was always awareness plus perceptions in all forms.

All the best, Yev

[mpsi]

Hi Yev!

There is no "me" there even during a contraction. That's also a mental image. In fact, I can't find a "me" anywhere. And it could never have been there, as my raw experience was always awareness plus perceptions in all forms.

Is this "raw experience" something that exists in actual experience? How else could you describe this raw experience?

All the best,
Marcin

[anigeka]

Hi Marcin,

Is this "raw experience" something that exists in actual experience? How else could you describe this raw experience?

I'm not sure how else to describe it, really. There is just raw data that enters my perception from the 5+ senses. It seems like that's all there ever is or was to my experience. A "me" doesn't enter the picture anywhere in here aside from thought which is also nothing but a perceived phenomenon.

All the best,
Yev

[mpsi]

Hi Yev,

I'm not sure how else to describe it, really. There is just raw data that enters my perception from the 5+ senses. It seems like that's all there ever is or was to my experience. A "me" doesn't enter the picture anywhere in here aside from thought which is also nothing but a perceived phenomenon.

What is this "raw data"? How is it?

Best wishes,
Marcin

[anigeka]

Hi Marcin,

What is this "raw data"? How is it?

I have no idea. The only thing I can say is that it's not separate from the perceiving of it. Any data that enters perception is made out of perception.

All the best,

Yev

[mpsi]

Dear Yev,

What you write feels as if the actual experience was hidden behind a thick grey wall with "raw data" written on it. Is that really so? Please look what is there, as it's happening. It's not a question of "understanding", it's all about simply looking.

All the best,
Marcin

[anigeka]

Hi Marcin,

What you write feels as if the actual experience was hidden behind a thick grey wall with "raw data" written on it. Is that really so? Please look what is there, as it's happening. It's not a question of "understanding", it's all about simply looking.

You're absolutely right. The experience is what it is. I've just been mentally engaging this, trying to create some sense. But I know full well that it's the mind that creates the separations.

All the best,
Yev

[mpsi]

Hi Yev,

Thank you for your response. Is there something more you would like to investigate?

With best wishes,
Marcin

[mpsi]

Hi Yev,

How are you doing? If you would like, we can continue our investigation for example from this point:

it's the mind that creates the separations

Is there a mind anywhere? What is it, the mind?

Also:

I've just been mentally engaging this, trying to create some sense.

Who is that "I" in this sentence?

With best wishes,
Marcin

[anigeka]

Hi Marcin!

Is there a mind anywhere? What is it, the mind?

There's no mind that I can find. When I look for it, all I find is silence.

Who is that "I" in this sentence?

There no "I" there that I can find. As far as I can tell, that still refers to the imaginary, though created self which doesn't exist anywhere when looked.

All the best,
Yev

[mpsi]

Hi Yev,

There's no mind that I can find. When I look for it, all I find is silence.

How is the looking done? Who does the looking?

How are words interpreted? How is meaning/sense discovered?

All the best,
Marcin

[anigeka]

Hi, Marcin!

How is the looking done? Who does the looking?

How are words interpreted? How is meaning/sense discovered?

There does seem to be a "search", but it comes to a quick end, because the question doesn't make sense when actually pondered. There is a process of searching, but nobody doing it. It's like asking 'How do you divide the color red by the Grand Canyon'. The mind just comes to a still because there is clearly no answer. From experience, there is 'no one' doing the looking. It is taking place by itself. As for how words are interpreted and meaning constructed, I have no idea. If somebody says the word 'glasses', the meaning is obvious given some context. It's a spontaneous understanding.

All the best,
Yev

[mpsi]

Hi Yev,

A few days ago you wrote the following about the sense of "existence itself":

I don't know if I can really say something about it. It's just a general sense of "I exist". I can't really point to how I perceive it, as it's not localized anywhere in my awareness. It's not in the body and not in the mind. It's just a knowing of existence. It's the most familiar feeling one can possibly have, yet I can't objectify it. If I try to, my attention is usually placed somewhere in the chest area.

Is this sense of "I exist" still present? Can you write some more about it? How is it related to what happens in the actual experience?

With best wishes,
Marcin

[anigeka]

Hi Marcin,

Is this sense of "I exist" still present? Can you write some more about it? How is it related to what happens in the actual experience?

From some contemplation, it seems as though the sense of existence and awareness are not two different things. If there was no existence, there would be no awareness. Likewise, if the brain is in deepest states of rest and there is no awareness of anything objective, there is no sense of existence. Experience happens not to me, a person, but to "I am", existence/awareness. As I am sitting right now, having thoughts, listening to random noises and feeling sensations though the nervous system, awareness is modulated by those experiences, as it can't possibly have any inherent qualities to experience. It needs perception to know itself.

I hope I'm not over-intellectualizing this whole thing, as I know that's a trap in and of itself, and as always, I appreciate your time.

All the best,
Yev

[mpsi]

Hi Yev,

Thank you for your response. Let's put that question aside again for some time, and let's get back to your previous post. You wrote:

The mind just comes to a still because there is clearly no answer.

What does "the mind" in this sentence refer to? What does the "coming to a still" mean? Please describe the process as it happens.

All the best,
Marcin