If you are ready, come in..

[MerlinC]

ther is no self there is only thought and how I know this is because I can watch thought but its not thought its awareness and no the self wasnt always thare it was something that was learned from childhood and then added to.

[Ilona]

Good stuff. Ok, so now answer this- what is self and how does this illusion work? How would you explain this to somebody curious about it? Write a lot.

[MerlinC]

I would say self is the minds thoughts that at times combine them selfs to become ones beliefs which make the frame work for a me or indentity. an indentity is just a collection of ideas that become beleved and added to make the illusion that this construct of thought is real but its just a well told story of fiction. the story gos on & on always changing because beliefs change and with beliefs come there behaviors. so with questioning beliefs you try to bring some awareness and truth to the insainty that people are born into and try to help them along to discover that the storys are just storys and so they dont have to waste anymore energy holding up false ideas about themselfs and the world. to get to a point were you cant believe the next thought as your own because its a product of the mind not from an individual that controls ones processes.

[Ilona]

How does it feel to see that there is no self at all? How is your everyday life, is there a significant change?

[MerlinC]

It feels surprising that thought is just thought. And thoughts about things is not direct experience of them. my everday life is not as hectic or bothersome as I had once thought its actualy quite with lots of rests. before I thought I had to worry about my problems but that doesnt do anything but create worry. I dont think Im the Dali lama just yet but Im getting thare.

[Ilona]

:) that is great to hear!

Can you look back and tell me where and when the shift happened? What was it that made you look, was there an event, a moment, when invisible line was crossed?

[MerlinC]

I was stressing over how to find awakening but I was trying to think myself into it but I came to the rational conclusion that thought can only know past information and no matter how hard I would try to find the answer it would only be digging up old info so with that knowledge and coming here and asking questions about whats true and also watching and reading Eckhart Tolle, Adyashanti which asked questions like who is aware of the thoughts. finally I met up with the now we live in. Its so profoundly simple I have to ask is there more to the journey?

[Ilona]

of course there is much more! this is just the beginning, a fresh start, not an end to a journey. just a next chapter. :) lets see how you answer these questions, please do that in full as you see now.

1) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works.
2) How would you describe it to somebody who has never heard about this illusion but is curious about it.

:)

[MerlinC]

The illusion of separation & self starts with a thought believed. The more thoughts believed the more friction in life you experience. Because believed thought as harmonies or separate in nature they may be are still hindrances to seeing what actually goes on in true experience. So one day you pick up a belief pattern about yourself and your surroundings and that belief is easily forgotten as just a belief and then becomes true for you because before you know it you built beliefs about your beliefs and beliefs about them and so on. Until you feel as though you figured it all out for yourself but really you just made a wall surrounding you from the outside world but the sad thing is it is lies we tell are self's, a story, a thing of fiction. and it keeps us from having what we had as kids which is freedom not just the thought about it. I would describe it to them that the people we have become is built from the ground sense birth and to become who we really are we will have to question what has been common knowledge for eons no holds bar everything revalued.

[Ilona]

Good stuff, monarch. :)
One more question and it may not be the last, just want to make sure that you have crossed the gate with both legs.

Can you look back and describe the precise moment, when seeing happened. What thoughts were there, what exactly triggered this change, how it happened and when, what happened right after? Write about it as fully as you can.

Sending love.

[MerlinC]

well the first time I seen it in full was when I was reading a book about the subject and I got what it was trying to say to me for the first time even though I have read it several times. The thought was maybe its not thought I'm supposed to ask or look at maybe its to look or notice what was going on right at the moment and be still and see. so I did and I had a glimpse but I went back to over think about what went on and so I didn't bother doing it again and then I gave it another chance and then another and sense so much of my attention was on the mind and its thoughts about what was going on I gave that more respect then the now but I started to notice that the moment held a certain peace about it and I realized that's what I want and everybody else wants without say that's why we do the things we do so I continued my practice on tell I learned there is never a time we are not in the moment so I keep on bringing my noticing back to the now and the experience is deepening for me I can see why they call it awakening because its like coming in and out of being awareness to an auto pilot kinda life like dreaming.

[Ilona]

What do you mean by being awareness? Are you awareness?

[MerlinC]

Awareness is happening but its not a person doing it. I feel as though Im still my thoughts but something is aware that Im having thoughts.

[Ilona]

What do you mean- it feels that I am my thoughts?
I is thought.
My is thought.

You are saying that thought I feels like thoughts' my thought?
Hmmm look deeper here.

[MerlinC]

self is thought including the commenting thought about it and the one after that so who notices this?