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[ratnapani]

Hi Doerian,

I hope you are well.
LU has a set of 6 questions designed to cover all bases of what you have seen. Would you like to have a go at them?

Then I would like to submit this whole thread to the other guides to see if they have any further questions.

Questions, questions, I hope you are not feeling 'hey, give me a break !' but it is good to cross all the Ts and dot the 'I' s -even if you can't find any; LOL.
(I do hope you know the dotting and crossing expression)

Have a happy day.
Ratnapani xx

[Doerian]

Hi Ratnapani,

(I do hope you know the dotting and crossing expression)

Seems to be nice joke but I don't get it LOL

Send them up and let's cross all the T's and dot the I's wherever they may be :)

Doerianxx

And I Wiki'd the expression and in Dutch there's a similar expression dotting the I's even more LOL now :)

[ratnapani]

Hi Doerian,

Here you are then.
Please take your time, enjoy and answer fully.

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience and understanding. Describe it fully as you see it now.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference (if anything) between now and before you started the guidance?

4) Was there something specific you looked into or something that was mentioned during this guidance that made you fully realise? - Was there a specific moment where you 'tipped over' into realising 'no self'?

5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control as you understand it now. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Please give examples from experience if you can, and explain what you have realised.

6) Do you have anything further you would like to add?


Look forward to hearing from you.
Ratnapani xx

[ratnapani]

Hi Doerian,

How are you ? How is it going with the questions ?

Ratnapani xx

[Doerian]

Hi Ratnapani,

Just after you posted the question some difficulty happened with my daughter which brought me right back into I, me, mine stories.
So mind or thought decided that it wasn't the right time to answer the questions. That the illusion was still there and not seen through.
As if Santa Claus was back to stay forever…
Looking, seeing, being aware seemed to have vanished but of course it didn't.
I'll have a go at it…

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No there is no 'I' no self me, mine not anywhere no shape nor form. Not traceable there wasn't ever!

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience and understanding. Describe it fully as you see it now.

The illusion of separate self is that there seems to be an entity, a sort of core, somewhere let's say in the brain a form/shape/core that is me I mine. Has a specific identity an uniqueness that is the I, constituted by previous conditiosn as genes, dna personal history, etc.If you strip down a person this core I would be left over or otherwise be found in each cell of this person. This identification with an I started probably at an early age/stage of awareness in childhood perhaps as soon as speech became a mens of expressing. (2 or 3 years). This is a guess. I can remember a state of direct awareness, or being aware in broad sense as can be experienced now in an early stage of being.
The being doesn't mean that there's a separate self. This is difficult to explain.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference (if anything) between now and before you started the guidance?

The difference is subtle and huge. There's the experience of more freedom and more stillness or equanimity. Things still happen like thoughts, events, and emotions that can be still overwhelming but the evaporate quite quickly into thin air, they don't stick to anything anymore. Sometimes the identification with I is there again, feelings of hurt or disappointment or shame or guilt arise and pass away again they don't cling anymore, nothing to hold on to. This is funny. And a relieve to experience it also generates a deep calmness and deep love. No separateness anymore which can be awesome.
Also looking or seeing with fresh eyes, with wonder, really seeing with a lot of curiosity is awesome, beautiful. More appreciation for what can be seen, smelled, heard, felt etc arises and a lot of gratitude. Seeing the world with the eyes of a newborn or o curious toddler.

4) Was there something specific you looked into or something that was mentioned during this guidance that made you fully realise? - Was there a specific moment where you 'tipped over' into realising 'no self'?

Yes some experiments like with raising the arm and in my case especially seeing my fingers type without giving a command. The weirdest thing and in the same time very very calming and funny, hilarious. Makes me smile even now.

5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control as you understand it now. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Please give examples from experience if you can, and explain what you have realised.

Decision there's no decision in the sense of preferences like in the experiment of choosing a drink. No chooser can be found and it's also ridiculous to choose it's not an issue at all. Anyways nothing to get from that. Still there are decisions being made in a deeper level not by a chooserI can point to. If there's no resistance to what is and no fight because of the believe in an I it seems that there's a sort of flow or current a stream that goes in a favorable way without many obstructions. But there's nothing to be gained or nowhere to go it's just being seeing experiencing awaring that's the whole point in fact there's no point. It just is and it's marvelous!
Free will, that's an interesting one. I don't know about free will anymore.It is not that there isn't any free will, but it's also not so that everything is determined or fixed or decided or. Strictly speaking there's no free will but this isn't enslaving or restricting or determining in fact it's the opposite it's tremendously freeing and spacious.

6) Do you have anything further you would like to add?

Yes.It's not that there are no questions anymore, there still are but there's nothing wrong with that.

Doerian xx

[ratnapani]

Hi Doerian,

I'm sorry to hear about the difficulties with your daughter but pleased that you have been able to regain perspective.

Looking, seeing, being aware seemed to have vanished but of course it didn't.

Seeing the illusion of a separate self does not free us from pain all in one go so it can feel as if we've 'lost it'.
Despite being seen the illusion continues to have effects so we need to continue to look until it is 'utterly seen' and has no further hold on us.

Yes.It's not that there are no questions anymore, there still are but there's nothing wrong with that.

Spot on I'd say

I love your answers and will put our whole thread up for consideration by other guides --they might have questions !!!

Wishing you peace and wisdom in your relationship with your daughter.
Ratnapani xx

[ratnapani]

Hi, hows it going ?
No questions so far from anyone else.

I'm waiting for a third person to say - no more questions !!

Ratnapani xx

[ratnapani]

Hi Doerian,

There are no further questions.
There is a group on LU called Unleashed for sharing experiences and exploring any doubts or further looking.

Are you on Facebook because there is an LU group there for support and further looking and I can put you on to another group that involves guided further looking if you're interested.

I hope you are well and that there is harmony with your daughter.

It's raining a lot here which is pleasing because I am dependent on a rapidly reducing spring for water.

Lots of love,
Ratnapani.

[Doerian]

Hi Ratnapani,

So good to hear from you.
And my daughter had troubles herself in fact we have quite good harmony together but as a mother it can be hard to see your loved ones suffer.

Good for you concerning the water! Just lovely!

Nice that there are no questions anymore. Appreciate enormously what you're all doing! Deep bow.

I'm fully in identification and 'I'ing' again so further investigation and guided looking would be very interesting.

Thank you so much Ratnapani what a wondrous journey!
Lots of love from rainy Antwerp (I love the rain and will bike to my harbor office in a moment just for the fun of it :)
Doerian

[ratnapani]

Hi Doerian,

I'm not a parent but I've still got a feel for how painful it is to see a child suffer.

I hope you get time to be quiet and look again to see if there is actually anyone 'in there' ? Or is there just an illusion identifying with discomfort out of habit. If we see there is no self how can we possibly have aversion to anything or craving for anything but we do - the illusion in action. Catch it at work and another level of the illusion is busted !

Are you on Facebook and if so what do you call yourself ? (so to speak!)
I will register you as 'done' and your Fb ID would give easy access to LU Fb groups.

Love,
Ratnapani.

[Doerian]

Hi Ratnapani,

Thank you and thanks for the guiding again.

Or is there just an illusion identifying with discomfort out of habit. If we see there is no self how can we possibly have aversion to anything or craving for anything but we do - the illusion in action. Catch it at work and another level of the illusion is busted !

Send you my FBid in private message.

Love,
Doerian

[Doerian]

Hi Ratnapani,

Everything ok?
Did you receive my private message?

Love,
Doerian

[ratnapani]

hi Doerian,

All is well
I got your pm and after some technical difficulties I have registered you as 'confirmed'. !!!

Your dot on the site should soon turn blue and I can add you to 'Unleashed' or 'Aftercare' on Fb.
There another group if you want to look specifically into the illusion of 'Desire' and 'Ill will'

I hope you are well
Lots of love,
Ratnapani

[Doerian]

Hi Ratnapani,

Good to hear from you!
Doing fine. Still into the little exercises, very helpful and supportive.
Otherwise easily caught in stories and I again…

There another group if you want to look specifically into the illusion of 'Desire' and 'Ill will'

Very interested to join these groups.

My dot didn't turn blue yet which I don't mind but perhaps you do.


Before you leave just one last question you promised me to answer after the gate, or as you mentioned

at a later stag

At this stage lets keep it simple - there is awareness here and there is awareness there but in neither place is a separate self needed for that to be so.
We can look at the 'emptiness' of both self and other at a later stage !

Lots of love,
Doerian

[ratnapani]

Hi Doerian,
I'll email you.
Admin will turn you blue ! at some point soon. I'm sure we are both just fine with any colour dot ! I didn't get the technicalities sorted until today - changing from Windows to Mac was a challenge.