Seeking for too long to the point that my face is blue

[Shmear]

It's just happenin of course but
It's never had a chance to happen until your post, so everything is just happening to no one. Thank you.


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[Sarah7]

Thanks for that!
I look forward to reading what's noticed from the seeing exercise!
Hugs S

[Shmear]

The seeing of sights and seeing separation, dividing line is impossible with direct experience, unless I'm going there with the thought.
Whats happening when seeing is happening?
I don't know. Images passively reflected in my inner eye then processed in the brain I realize that seeing is happening all by itself to no one unless there is a me thought attached to it.
Clearly, the thought makes all the divisions and separations.
After the exercise I felt as if boundaries have melted and for a moment a little oneness opened up. It felt nice and kinda mystical but only briefly.
I've been trying relive it later but it's all gone.
There the body and there's all the rest.


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[Sarah7]

Hey

After the exercise ..........I've been trying to relove it later, but it's all gone.

Expectation. Do you see it? What is this made up of?

So onto hearing!
Notice the sounds you’re hearing, like the chirping of the birds. Notice the habitual thought, "Those are birds." Notice the habitual thought, "I hear that." Now just pay attention to how hearing happens. Take your time with it. Can you find a dividing line between the sound and the hearing of the sound? Are you doing the hearing? Or is it truer to say that hearing is just happening? Then look to see whether there's a dividing line between the hearing of it and a separate entity, a "you," doing the hearing. In other words, what does it mean when you say, "I'm hearing that sound"? Are there really three entities there in direct experience, an "I" and hearing and a sound? Or is there just one experience of hearing, with no one as a hearer. Look closely. Try it with various sounds. See if you can find a way to separate the sound from the hearing and the hearing from the hearer. Where does one start and the other end? So what do you see about the thought, "I'm hearing that sound"? Is it an accurate description of direct experience?
What is a noise? Is that a label also? Is the sound there? Can you really know?
Hugs Sarah xxx

[Shmear]

Hi Sarah.

Hearing is just happening no doubt.
Dividing line ? Only my thoughts will contrive its existence.
I couldn't find 3 entity, not even close. It's all one piece.
I'm hearing" is a lie, thoughts made up believe that's all.

As with seeing or the skin boarder line perception, the hearing is a part of this whole big spacial thing that happen to hit as a wave the sensory cells of inner ear then get passed as impulse to the cortex and suddenly brain function kicks is just as involuntarily and thought formation happens, and as a result in our awareness the " me thought has contributed to the overall composite of the "me story".
I did play with it as u can see and tried to combine with seeing.
I liked it. I was even getting glimpses of seeing : perhaps Sarah knows what she's talking about and this body is just another product of daydream.
Lite feel with spacial melt.
Love it. Seems like long way to go though.

Do you suggest to keep on this practice until the big drop just happens?

Thank you.


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[Sarah7]

Morning!

Code: Select all

Do you suggest to keep on this practise until the big drop just happens?

What big drop? What expectation do you have here?

Touch the table (or any object) with your eyes shut (or open). Pretend like it’s the first time you have ever touched a table. Go straight to the raw sensation/perception. What is your direct experience of this ‘table’? List your direct experience. Is it senses again? Is it thoughts again? Look very closely. Which comes first the senses or the thoughts?
Does the sensation of touching come with a shape, density, weight, size, colour, age or function? Does this sensation come with a ‘not me’ label or ‘other’ label? Is it one sensation/perception or two?
Look at how thoughts try and take over, try and explain, try and prove. Notice your memories or references with which you compare the experience.
Sit with these sensations. Look at them. Look at the labelling e.g. table, hand. Look at the thoughts or story that attach at the end of this list if any. What is your direct experience of these words? Do they exist outside of thought? Are they sensations again? Are they just thoughts again? Look very closely. Which comes first the sensation or the thoughts? Don’t pay attention to the thoughts just look at what they do, when they come in.

Sit on a chair with your eyes closed. Feel the Direct Experience of sitting there. Notice thoughts thinking, labelling and explaining. Notice memory too. Notice sensations experiencing. Notice the sensation of bottom on chair – what is that – a thought? Notice the ‘me’ ‘mine labels e.g. this is my bottom – but look closely at that sensation labelling – is it yours, or just coming and going along with thoughts, ever changing. Is it the thought that wants to own? How many sensations do you notice? 2? One bottom sensation, and one chair sensation? How is that possible? Where does one sensation end and another begin? Locate that line. Can you feel that line? Or is that thought? Can you sense that line – or is that thought explaining the sensation?

Eyes closed. Turn your attention to your skin. Do you have Direct Experience of it being outside?
Hugs Sarah xxx

[Shmear]

Morning!

Code: Select all

Do you suggest to keep on this practise until the big drop just happens?

What big drop? What expectation do you have here?

Touch the table (or any object) with your eyes shut (or open). Pretend like it’s the first time you have ever touched a table. Go straight to the raw sensation/perception. What is your direct experience of this ‘table’? List your direct experience. Is it senses again? Is it thoughts again? Look very closely. Which comes first the senses or the thoughts?
Does the sensation of touching come with a shape, density, weight, size, colour, age or function? Does this sensation come with a ‘not me’ label or ‘other’ label? Is it one sensation/perception or two?
Look at how thoughts try and take over, try and explain, try and prove. Notice your memories or references with which you compare the experience.
Sit with these sensations. Look at them. Look at the labelling e.g. table, hand. Look at the thoughts or story that attach at the end of this list if any. What is your direct experience of these words? Do they exist outside of thought? Are they sensations again? Are they just thoughts again? Look very closely. Which comes first the sensation or the thoughts? Don’t pay attention to the thoughts just look at what they do, when they come in.

Sit on a chair with your eyes closed. Feel the Direct Experience of sitting there. Notice thoughts thinking, labelling and explaining. Notice memory too. Notice sensations experiencing. Notice the sensation of bottom on chair – what is that – a thought? Notice the ‘me’ ‘mine labels e.g. this is my bottom – but look closely at that sensation labelling – is it yours, or just coming and going along with thoughts, ever changing. Is it the thought that wants to own? How many sensations do you notice? 2? One bottom sensation, and one chair sensation? How is that possible? Where does one sensation end and another begin? Locate that line. Can you feel that line? Or is that thought? Can you sense that line – or is that thought explaining the sensation?

Eyes closed. Turn your attention to your skin. Do you have Direct Experience of it being outside?
Hugs Sarah xxx

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[Shmear]

Does the sensation of touching come with a shape, density, weight, size, colour, age or function? Does this sensation come with a ‘not me’ label or ‘other’ label? Is it one sensation/perception or two?

The sensation is raw only when I'm not thinking while touching.
Direct tactile experience exercise is fun. As soon as object is recognized, the immediate knowing of it comes along.
I didn't notice label " me or " no me in direct exp. unless I'm trying to draw a line between.

I enjoy this exercise a lot. Realizing the raw nature without context of the object and then compare the very same object felt after the thought process takes over and turns it to a concept with its separate story line with past and future.

Bottom on the chair felt as separate sense only if believing ones thought. It's all one otherwise.

So, every sensation has "me in it.
That me is exists only in the thought. That's very clear.
I really liked this one. I think I will try to make it my daily thing for a while until it sinks.

Thank you Sarah.


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[Sarah7]

Glad you liked it!
So have fun with smell and taste! Good excuse to endure in some nice food or coffee (if that's your thing).
So look for the dividing line again. Where is the separation?
Are you ever separate from experience? And if so what creates that separation?
We will have a look at the body after this. Ok!
Hugs Sarah xxx

[Sarah7]

Second post!
Does seeing, hearing, touch etc happen even when attention so on something else?
Hugs S xx

[Shmear]

Taste is a funny one to experiment with. Usually, being hungry makes me forget about the new purpose of eating until I'm satiated.
Just as with smell and all other senses division is a product of the mind.
I found a huge value in observing the act of seeing/heating/tasting/activity ... that happens by itself without me in it and without any daydreaming thoughts.
Just that - rawness of task at hand in the midst of pure awareness. All is happening by itself without thinking, therefor no me in it.
I feel I'm starting making the progress.thank you Sarah !


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[Sarah7]

Hey
Sounds like you had fun! Ok so let's have a look at the body bringing all of the previous exercises to.

Stand in front of a bigger mirror.
(1) First, close the eyes and feel the sensations in the body.
(2) Then open the eyes and look into the mirror, while still pay attention to the bodily sensations.
Is there any connection between the felt sensations in the body and the sight in the mirror?
Or just thoughts (and/or mental images) suggest that there is any?
(3) While still paying attention to the bodily sensations move one of the hands and observe the movement from the mirror.
Is there any connection between the felt sensations (in the hand) and sight of movement in the mirror?
(4) Now do the same movement with the hand, but this time look at the hand directly, not from the mirror.
Is there any connection between the felt sensations (in the hand) and sight of movement?
Or only thoughts suggest it?
(5) Now, pay attention only to the sight in the mirror.
Does the sight by itself suggest in any way that what is seen is ‘you’ or ‘your body’?
Does the sight itself suggest in any way that what is seen is a body at all?
Or there are only colours and shapes?
(6) Where the mirror ends, some parts of the body (probably legs) cannot be seen.
Just by the sight, is there any ‘knowledge’ that there must be legs, or only thoughts and mental images suggest it?
(7) Now turn away from the mirror and look forward (don’t look directly to any body parts).
Hugs Sarah xxx

[Shmear]

2nd post.

Regardless where my attention goes, the sensing is happening all by itself. Freaks me out.
Has never occurred to me to ever come to such an obvious conclusion.
Why would nature waste resources - have sense orga
Engagement without a purpose.
It changes everything I used to have such a proud sense of ownership " my keen eyesight,
" my hearing .... That goes with all rest of my faculties. They just doing their function without warring if paying attention to them. Good stuff. Thanks Sarah !
I feel so gullible.


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[Sarah7]

Hey Shmear
Anymore questions? Anything you want to look at?
Any doubt?
Has seeking ceased?
Do you feel the illusion of self has been clearly revealed?
Hugs Sarah xxx

[Shmear]

Sarah you're the best thank you so much !!!
Seeking came to a screeching halt. I swear.
At least for now. I'm sure there will be questions.
What a wonderful journey !!
I see it: my bodyspace has melted into overall
Empty space around. I hope I'm not grasping too much to the euphoria of it. ( I'm not on anything).
Loving kindness, Shmear!



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