Please guide x

[falcontooth]

Ah okay, although it still feels like I am the one behind the 8 ball trying to get something in the pocket.So is that related to the flip-flopping, and I felt angry to hear there would still be flip-flopping after the perception changes..1 because what if the perception change already happened as one of the glimpses that's been and all this time since, its the flip flop story? and also because flip flopping carries on, I see it as if I will still get flip flopping and don't want it..as in a me who would have to deal with further flip flopping and I'm fed up of this.

so the idea of getting it/losing it goes on but its impersonal and its also not real because the flip flopping song is just a thought appearing. Okay. my heads turned into mash potato but I cant make a meal out of it and desperately am trying to fry chips with no potatoes

Perception changes, however the seeming flip flopping between the idea of ‘getting it’ and ‘losing it’ go on, but the flip flopping is not happening to anyone. And there is really no flip flopping either as it is only thoughts appearing that say that something has ‘gotten it’ and then ‘lost it’.

[falcontooth]

The exercise with the AE/raw experience...with the thought category, it's freaky! Theres some mental scenario going on then THOUGHT! Oh yes, that is a thought. That's so weird. There are these thoughts that are images and they come and they show all this stuff and none of it is really about anything...and it feels like it has all this heaviness to it..that belongs to some one..but it doesn't..and that's just happening..thats freaky :D Lets get freaky baby!

[falcontooth]

So when I replied a few moments ago with

Ah okay, although it still feels like I am the one behind the 8 ball trying to get something in the pocket. So is that related to the flip-flopping, and I felt angry to hear there would still be flip-flopping after the perception changes..1 because what if the perception change already happened as one of the glimpses that's been and all this time since, its the flip flop story? and also because flip flopping carries on, I see it as if I will still get flip flopping and don't want it..as in a me who would have to deal with further flip flopping and I'm fed up of this.

All that is IS the flip flopping in action, I feel like David Attenborough observing the wildlife!

[falcontooth]

And here we have a thought..it's an image, it doesn't actually exist anywhere, and its usually the worse case scenario or a fantasy which ends up becoming a nightmare. Thoughts are mostly negative or concerning in some way, or blaming, judging, guilt, or fantasy-like thoughts of doing something other than what actually happened or might happen yet. So none of them are really anything and the image of some one that supposedly represents an individual its not anything solid.

When I changed my hair colour from dark to light..I noticed that it took thought images a little while to refresh the image..so some of the thoughts with the supposed me in them still had dark hair! poor editing!

Okay the 8 ball feeling is back...drinking from the waterhole...except there is nowhere to drink. It seems like there is...but its an image. Now a thought that the roof should blow off. Sound...birds singing. Oh no, back here where there's no answers and this cant be it x

[forgetmenot]

Hi Shelly,

1 because what if the perception change already happened as one of the glimpses that's been and all this time since, its the flip flop story? and also because flip flopping carries on, I see it as if I will still get flip flopping and don't want it..as in a me who would have to deal with further flip flopping and I'm fed up of this.

If you have already seen totally through the illusory self…you would not be here still LOOKING to see through it! Let go of all you are hoping, wanting and expecting of what you may or may not get from seeing through the illusion and let’s just focus on LOOKING.

So from here on in…it’s just LOOKING and answering questions from actual experience (AE).

A reminder of what LOOKING is:
‘Looking’ is just plain looking to what is here right now. When you need your car keys and look everywhere for them – that is looking. It’s noticing sound, taste, smell, sensation and colours (images) to see what is really present (actual experience) and always has been; as well as noticing thought/s - not thinking, but noticing or being ‘aware’ of thought/s.

So let’s begin to look at thoughts.

Here is a thought exercise. Sit for about 30 minutes and notice the arising thoughts. Just let them appear as they appear and notice what the thought actually is - words, images, bits of music - whatever appears.

Try your best to COMPLETELY ignore what they are saying, and rather just notice how they appear, without you doing anything at all.

- Did you do anything to make a particular thought or thoughts appear?
- Could you have done anything to make a different thought appear at that exact moment instead?
- Where are they coming from?
- Where are they going?
- Can you predict your next thought?
- Can you push away any thought?
- Can you select from a range of thoughts to have only pleasant thoughts?
- Can you stop thinking a thought in the middle?
- Can anything choose not to have painful or negative thoughts?
- Can anything pick and choose any kind of thought?
- Is it possible to control any thoughts?
- Is it possible to prevent a thought from appearing? Including the thought 'I'?
- It seems that thought has some logical ordered appearance, but look carefully and just notice if there is an organised sequence? Or is that just another thought that says ‘these thoughts are in sequence’ or “they take content from previous thought”, or that ‘one thought follows another thought’?

Please look carefully when doing this exercise and answer all questions individually using the quote function. Do the exercise a couple of times if necessary.

Also, continue to break down all experiences into sound, thought, colour/image, smell, taste and sensation throughout your day.

Love, Kay

[falcontooth]

Thank you for the exercises Kay. Okay, back later. Much love Shelly

[falcontooth]

- Did you do anything to make a particular thought or thoughts appear?

No

- Could you have done anything to make a different thought appear at that exact moment instead?

no

- Where are they coming from?

I dont know

- Where are they going?

just disappearing, nowhere

- Can you predict your next thought?

No.

- Can you push away any thought?

no

- Can you select from a range of thoughts to have only pleasant thoughts?

No.

- Can you stop thinking a thought in the middle?

looking. I don't know

- Can anything choose not to have painful or negative thoughts?

no, they happen.

- Can anything pick and choose any kind of thought?

no they are on automatic

- Is it possible to control any thoughts?

there's an idea that a thought is influenced by different thoughts that can change the initial thought, but that's still just further thought doing that so no.

- Is it possible to prevent a thought from appearing? Including the thought 'I'?

No.

- It seems that thought has some logical ordered appearance, but look carefully and just notice if there is an organised sequence? Or is that just another thought that says ‘these thoughts are in sequence’ or “they take content from previous thought”, or that ‘one thought follows another thought’?

No they are always changing, not always relevant to what's happening, some times inappropriate.

A few comments on the exercise. It seemed like there was {and this cant really be expressed with words} like a going into the raw experience of sensation, sound, and then a noticing of that and a distraction into thought commenting on the noticing of that happening.

[falcontooth]

and lots of distraction away from Sensation, sound, like it was very brief then thought...back to sensation then thought. Like that x

[falcontooth]

at one point it was like there were no sides to the body or back or top..like it extended into nothing..and then thoughts about what that is etc and then distracted for a bit then back to sensation, and so on. There was a thought to stay until the distractions stop but after an hour a cup of tea won out. The hour was meant to be half an hour as suggested but it was so wonderful like why do I never just be this sensation..or sound more often..and spacious.

and at one point a thought flashed about a field because a song was playing that had the lyric 'field' in it and then there was a fast speeding into a field to the microscopic level, and then the exercise kicked in again, colour/image.

Then thoughts shifted to not getting it and being distracted and so on

[falcontooth]

I may have fallen asleep at one point without realising it. A thought came that if the exercise can just be stayed with it will happen and to do it on a regular basis. Another thought said do it all the time, do only this now, but thoughts change into whatever's happening and it cant be fixed from what I can see

[falcontooth]

When you said

If you have already seen totally through the illusory self…you would not be here still LOOKING to see through it!

That triggered something. Like a de-tangling of the knot that had been that thought about am I seeing it or not. The flip flopping.

And a little relief at that being said and cleared up.

Let go of all you are hoping, wanting and expecting of what you may or may not get from seeing through the illusion and let’s just focus on LOOKING.

Thanks x

[falcontooth]

Let go of all you are hoping, wanting and expecting of what you may or may not get from seeing through the illusion and let’s just focus on LOOKING.

There's a thought that says that cant happen, or I cant look. But if there is no me to look, then I cant look. But looking is happening. Fuck this! Its thoughts. Okay its thoughts. flip-flopping is just thought.

it feels like this doesn't need to go on any longer, this not looking but there's engagement/distraction. Because there's still belief in it.

[falcontooth]

Okay its thoughts. flip-flopping is just thought.

Feels like I am just trying to convince myself.

So this me feeling and the convincing is also just thoughts. It feels so familiar that its hard to not be that and look without adopting. Sorry for rambling on Kay, its gone into intellectualizing and what you said was simple! x

[falcontooth]

Getting expectations and fears out in the open and out of the way is an important first step. Below is a list explaining what the LU process is not:

This is not a way to escape your daily life.
This is not about gaining something extra, becoming something special.
This is not about cultivating an altered state of consciousness.
This isn’t a trick of the mind, or twisting the mind into believing certain thoughts.
This is not about gaining a particular bit of knowledge.
This is not about having a certain thought or sequence of thoughts.
This is not about becoming a holy, good, moral or better person.
This is not a belief, religion, or a philosophy, it not magical or mystical.
This is not going to lead you to eternal peace and happiness, it is not about happiness.
This is not about freedom from emotions and intense feelings.
This is not about getting rid of self, ego, I.
This is not a solution to problems in relationships.
This is not a way to get free of depression or other diseases.
This is not about stopping thoughts, changing thoughts, getting rid of thoughts.
This is not a way to make the story of you disappear.
This is not about convincing you of anything.
This is not something that will lead to accumulation of money or things.
This is not a self-improvement program.

Okay, apologies for losing focus. back to looking. Just re-read the definition of looking and will continue with the exercise. Thanks again

[forgetmenot]

Hello Shelly,

Can anything pick and choose any kind of thought?

no they are on automatic

Yes!

- Is it possible to control any thoughts?

there's an idea that a thought is influenced by different thoughts that can change the initial thought, but that's still just further thought doing that so no.

Great looking!

- It seems that thought has some logical ordered appearance, but look carefully and just notice if there is an organised sequence? Or is that just another thought that says ‘these thoughts are in sequence’ or “they take content from previous thought”, or that ‘one thought follows another thought’?

No they are always changing, not always relevant to what's happening, some times inappropriate.

So what exactly is it that can have inappropriate or appropriate thoughts? Have a LOOK.

Can a thought have an inappropriate thought or know anything about inappropriate thoughts?
Can sensation have inappropriate thoughts?
Can colour/image have inappropriate thoughts?
Can sound have inappropriate thoughts?
Can smell have inappropriate thoughts?
Can taste have inappropriate thoughts?

When you find in AE what it is that is having inappropriate thought, please describe it to me in precise detail.

A few comments on the exercise. It seemed like there was {and this cant really be expressed with words} like a going into the raw experience of sensation, sound, and then a noticing of that and a distraction into thought commenting on the noticing of that happening.

And so what was appearing was sensation + sound + thought. The thoughts ABOUT what was happening is all story.

Love, Kay