Request a guide

[seeing clearly!]

Hi kevin,
My experience of my life seems to be sensorial. I see my computer screen, the tree outside my window.,my cat sleeping on floor next to me. hear the sounds of the keys on this keyboad, the sound of the furnace repairman in the basement, of myself moving in chair. all of these things and countless other sensory stimuli impinging on me. Then I experience the thoughts referring to everything. In all of this this no way to see who or what is the originator of anything other than the thought about everything. Even thought about me seem to be only a string of descriptions of one sort or another.
I cannot find a "solid" me to point to as a focal point. Yet, inside of me somewhere there seems to humm an expectancy of something profound in the background.

[KevinD]

Hi Larry,

Thank you.
Please let go of all expectations, even the thought there is something "profound in the background."
It will serve you no purpose and may in fact be an impediment to what we are doing here.

Can you do that?

In all of this this no way to see who or what is the originator of anything other than the thought about everything.

Who or what is the originator of thought about everything?

Thanks,

Kevin

[seeing clearly!]

Hi Kevin,
I have been sitting with the question "who is the originator of thoughts and cannot find something or someone who is the originator. In mind, thoughts simply come and go. and when there is a search for an "I" or a "me" it cannot be located either. Not sure where to go from here. I feel as though I am stuck somewhee. Like someone trying to move through mud. Help.

Larry

[KevinD]

Hi Larry,

Great stuff.
You just told me there is no I. so what possibly could be stuck?

Let's take a look at the self as the body.

Solely from direct experience:

Is the "body" just another thought label for sensations (namely tactile & kinesthetic)?

Does the body experience sensations and thoughts?

Best,

Kevin

[seeing clearly!]

Hi Kevin,
You are so right, how could a non existant "I" be stuck. This insight is causing me to reassess my emotional connection to my life. And taking the body as self has given me much to consider. However, today, because of a kidney stone I have experienced a lot of pain all day. I have been seeing my body as self and have found it hard to not see this body as experiencing pain. It really felt as though this body was consumed with pain. Thank you for the good coaching.
Regards,
Larry

[seeing clearly!]

Hi Kevin.
Wanted to check in to say, still here dealing with kidney stone pain. Doing the work as lack of pain will permit. Take good care.

Regards,

Larry

[KevinD]

Hi Larry,
Sorry for your pain.
Take your time with this and let's review when the pain subsides.
Speedy recovery, bud.
Best,
Kevin

[seeing clearly!]

Thank you so much, Kevin. No fun here. I think the stone has moved closer to my bladder which is a good thing. I have a Doc's appointment on wednesday. Maybe xray will show something good. Anyway, you take good care of you and I will be back with you hopefully in a few days. I am so enjoying the inquiring you are helping me with. I will continue this as much as I can

Best regards,

Larry

[KevinD]

Hi Larry,
Speedy recovery, bud.

[seeing clearly!]

Hello Kevin,

My bouncing baby stone passed my system at around 9:30 pm last nite. Woo Woo!! I feel like a hundred bucks. Howevert, just to touch back on this weekend I took on seeing this body as another thought label of sensations and kinesthetic processes. I could not, not however experience this body as not me because of the intense pain. I felt as though I was the prisoner of my physical body. Intellectually, now I can see it being a series of thoughts and projections from the mind. I will practice more throughout my day,

Thanks,
Larry

[KevinD]

Wow, Congrats!!
Spank that bad boy and give it a name.

Good call on the review of the body as self (I was planning on going there after your experience anyway, great self-awareness in picking that up).

Doubt is the last beast to leave the building, so it doesn't surprise me you interpreted an apparent me as the body during such pain.
Totally expected, completely normal.

Keep plugging away at that in direct experience.
And keep reporting back on what you find.

Best,

Kevin

[seeing clearly!]

Hi Kevin,
Just as with pain, there is a noticing that this body identified as "me' takes up a lot of emotional energy. I am starting to see the extent that thought plus sensation and emotion can get one so stuck in identifying those factors as a "me". Yet there is still the observer. This is so elusive.You know what's going to be so funny? When I do see through this stuff finally, it is going to be so funny. and so amazingly like , "Of Course!!.' How could it be any other way!'. Cool stuff!
Regards,
Larry

[KevinD]

Hi Larry,
Welcome back.
I hope you're feeling better.

Let's look at this body that sometimes feels like a self or an observer.

Is that anything more than a thought?
Examine this closely. Be sure.

Best,
Kevin

[seeing clearly!]

Hello Kevin,
Not only does thoughts about my body make it feel like me, so does bodily sensations like hunger, thirst, pain bodily twitches all seem to give the feeling of an "I" center. There is an identification with the whole system as "my" person.
Oh, and I had a strange reaction of detachment briefly from things in the physical world when realizing , if there is no "i" who owns stuff out here? Even now the mind is pulling thoughts and sensation of the body into 'I" sensation.
Regards,
Larry

[KevinD]

Interesting!

The mind has decided the body is a self, and for good measure, it's thrown in the emotions as well.
That's pretty fascinating work for something is just a thought.

Let's deal with the body.
If, God forbid, you lost your arms and legs in an accident--roughly half your body--would you be half a life?

If that is not the case, how can the body be what you truly are?

Best,
Kevin