Requesting a guide - randy

[randy]

-What brings you to Liberation Unleashed?:

My name is Randy. My self is a pain in the ass. I am hoping to lose it.
I want to be liberated.

-What is your background in terms of seeking and inquiry?

I have been interested in this stuff for about 6 months. I started being interested in mindfulness. I made a huge amount of progress quickly by being aware of my thoughts.. or possibly thinking about awareness. I became curious about nonduality, and after a while had some mindblowing experiences of timelessness/selflessness(or whatever). These experiences were only temporary and they stopped happening, but they gave me a taste of what is possible. I am hoping to lose the illusion of self for good.

-What do you expect of the conversation on this forum?

I expect nothing and I am open to anything.

[Jivanmukta_Nothing]

Hi Randy,

Want to take me on as a guide?

Delson

[randy]

Hi Delson,

I'd be glad to. Thanks for offering.

Randy

[randy]

If the endless self-centered babble of the mind stops, one can enter a place where now becomes an eternal moment, and one instinctively knows exactly what to do. Life becomes an amazing flowing 3-d experience, which is exactly what it is.
Is this what we are talking about here?

[randy]

If the endless self-centered babble of the mind stops, one can enter a place where now becomes an eternal moment, and one instinctively knows exactly what to do. Life becomes an amazing flowing 3-d experience, which is exactly what it is.
Is this what we are talking about here?

I'll answer my own question. No. I was confusing the truth with an altered state of consciousness(albeit without drugs).
Realizing that you are not running your life does not make you stop thinking.
Is there an I?
There is a body and a field of awareness. I refer to that as I. No free will. No central management. God is a distributed system and we are all networked paralell processing units.
I'm waiting for my guide to tell me I'm full of shit.

[randy]

Since my guide is not here to tell me I'm full of shit, I'll have to tell myself that I'm full of shit. But... Who would be telling who that who is full of shit?
There is only shitfullness and nobody is here to experience it.

[randy]

I've been conceptualizing the world as being made of energy. This may seem silly, but when I do this, it becomes clear that I am not causing anything. It becomes obvious that there is only one thing, and that what is happening is part of an endless chain of events. I am just a part of that chain of events.
I, as a willful creator, do not exist. There is only one blob of interconnected happenings - An infinitely large complex flowing play of energy, which is god.

By the way, my guide is obviously not taking part in this thread. If anyone would like to reply here, please feel free to.