Request for a guide

[Ilona]

Is there a centre to which life is happening?
What do you find when examine that with each sense perception. (Seeing, hearing, tasting, touch and smelling?)

[Jodie]

There seems to be a centre. Something feels all these sensations.

Without the existence of this life, the sensations wouldn't exist. If this life ended would the birds still exist without their sounds being heard... their colours being seen?

It seems that life is happening to life

[Ilona]

How is it going today?

There seems to be a centre. Something feels all these sensations.

Can you look closer and find the centre. What is there?
Is there a feeler of sensations? Can you find the feeler? Or just sensations?


Look around: is life happening to a tree, to a bird, to the sky or as a tree, as a bird, as the sky? As you or to you?
Don't think much about it, just have a look.


Sending love.

[Jodie]

There is just sensations. Sometimes when meditating the sensations appear as rapid flickers of colours and shapes. Then there is just light and movement. At the centre of all this there is no feeler of anything, just motion, light, space.

Yes, life happens AS a bird, the sky, a tree. Life happens as me.

Thanks for the love. Difficult times atm. Relationship ending.

[Ilona]

Ending relationship is no fun indeed... Sending you a warm hug..

Can you find a line, between you and the other? Where is it?
Is there a line between inside and outside?
Are there other separate selves?

Much love.

[Jodie]

This is quite beautiful
There is no line
There are no separate selves, the many forms all originating from the same. Like mountain water moving into separate streams and rivers with 'names'. The water doesn't have a name, it's just water.

Water doesn't know that it's water. It doesn't think about it's wateriness. It just is...

Thanks for the hug :)

[Ilona]

Beautiful!
Is there any doubt? Can you find a sense of separatedness? Can you find a sense of onenness?
What do you find?

[Jodie]

Hi Ilona :)

When I ask if there is any doubt, thoughts for separateness seem feeble. Like they're trying to tell me the sky's green when I know it's blue.

The thoughts and doubts permeate reality, having a label or opinion for everything. They arise from oneness and fall back to oneness.

I would have really struggled with this at one point. Life's series of painful events forcing me to surrender seem like a blessing now.

You're right. No need for 2 years of flame torching the ego. Just look, really look. Having died recently - on good friday ;) - certainly helped weaken my grip on duality!

Is it possible to forget this?
Like, think the sky is green again?

[Ilona]

it can be forgotten, but it's not hidden. every time you look, it's obvious.
now take a look, what is ego? what does this word refer to, what do you find?

:)
sending love.

[Jodie]

that makes sense.

Ego is thoughts believing in themselves. Ego refers to itself, the self that it creates. This created self turns every sensation into something it can own. It make things up. It creates a 'me'

It takes constant, vigilant effort to keep believing in this ego - exhausting!

[Ilona]

let's look closer.
can you find an entity called EGO? where is it found?
do thoughts believe in thoughts?

how does owning happen? where it the owner?
what do you find?

sending love

[Jodie]

I feel sick. I don't think I can do this.
Ego doesn't want to be found.
I believe in the thoughts
I don't have any answers...

[Jodie]

i don't know

[Jodie]

it is found in futility, hopelessness, fear

[Ilona]

Well, there is no ego in charge, nothing to find.
We were told that there is this ego, that it's selfish and it makes things go her way. But where is it, other than in thoughts? Thought ego does not do anything.
The behavioural patterns, habits, preferences, all that- I prefer to call character. Less negative, and there is nothing to destroy or get rid of. Can you see that?

Hugs