At the front door, waiting for you

[1llusion]

Yes.

[1llusion]

A metaphor with regard to thought: It seems to be some strange kind of radio station, sometimes resonating with stored memories (i.e. repeating songs), sometimes begging for relevance, sometimes pretending to be quite reasonable.. It's actually quite funny but entirely irrelevant.

Its obvious now that whatever is perceived doest not "really" change anything.

[kenbok]

Good. Where is this perception happening? Who is perceiving? Any I in all of this?

[kenbok]

Over 'time', as checking becomes habituated, a non-opening (in the sense that "I" arguably can only view itself) becomes the default, rather than the occasional.

[1llusion]

No idea..
- ..where this perception happens
- ..how it happens
- ..what preceives it

There is only awareness, THAT it happens.

What is meant by non-opening?

[1llusion]

AH funny, for some reason I am still here, right? Apparently that is just an attempt to postpone something? A waiting for something to happen in the future, but never now?

[kenbok]

Non-opening of the gateless gate. :)

AH funny, for some reason I am still here, right? Apparently that is just an attempt to postpone something? A waiting for something to happen in the future, but never now?

Excellent.

So again, what are you expecting to get out of this process?

[1llusion]

Whatever.

[kenbok]

So whatever you will get...

[1llusion]

Thank you. Bye.

[kenbok]

The door is still open for you, friend. If something has brought you here, then perhaps it is best you explore that something fully.

[1llusion]

OK, to clarify: The above was to "break free" of the necessity of continuing this and giving up the idea of there being the need of you doing or acknowledge anything..

I don't see anything left to explore.

[kenbok]

Okay. What pushed you over to this point? What changed?

[1llusion]

I had a moment of confusion/fear where I thought "Oh, what have I done. I want my 'self' back." while knowing this is impossible. That made me realize that there is nothing to wait for, nothing to be gained and no-one to gain anything.

[kenbok]

Very nice. Let me check in with the team.