Again, gratitude Vimalasara, for all your time and energy and the direct questioning, i wanted to tell you that it was particularly helpful when you said you would walk next to me for as long as it would take, there was a story/fear that i stopped believing in after that, and just was able to drop ...

Hi Vimalasara

That sounds like a lovely weekend.

7) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

Going through the heart sutra line by line when I layed in bed ill. Searching within each place for a presence of self, finding nothing. Something clicked (not literally) Coupled with ...

Hey Vimalasara

I am back from a lovely time with Kalyanasri. I hope you are having a good weekend too.

4) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works.

From what I've seen, the experience occurs/happens/emerges, and then the selfing thoughts hook on ...

Hi Vimalasara

Thank you for your questions. I have been feeling much gratitude for all your time and questions.

Is there a 'me' or 'you' or 'I' , at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever? Can there ever be?

No. No self at all, anywhere in any way shape or form. Just a belief ...

Hi Vimalasara

...when we see that there is no separate self we can go into cycles of doubt, cycles of depression. doubt and a degree of depression can be normal, it's like the grieving process of loss. we can grieve the loss of something we have clung on for dear life, the loss of something that ...

Hi Vimalasara

Please take the day off - stay with the direct experience of being unwell - allow yourself to do that.

I stayed in bed, in and out of sleep most of the day. Reflecting on the heart sutra and on your questions.

But what is true is: that you can change. The apology can come - and ...

Hi Vimalasara

Still unwell, I left work at lunchtime today, again something I would not usually. The stories are probably rooted in a Protestant work ethic guilt if I'm not at work. What will others think? , you could ask what would it mean not to identify with feeling unwell? Are you aware of any ...

Hi Vimalasara

The body has been feeling unwell today. The thoughts have been whether I am going to be sick or whether I can get through the day.

so you can practise every time a strong emotion arises, every time you are triggered.

My supervisor is away for the week, so no very strong emotion ...

Hi Vimalasara

Thank you for your encouraging message. I look forward to letting the heart sutra deeply into my being. No work today, so although there is family, birthday cakes to make and children to stop fighting and entertain there has been more space to reflect today. In every spare moment, I ...

Hi ya Vimalasara

Thank you for your reply. It is amazing what you are doing for me.

I've highlighted some things for you to reflect on. You write
"I feel like there is more pain in my body because my stories aren't sticking to it as much and I am noticing that more."
Can you see the story in ...

Hi Vimalasara

Is it possible to notice emotions without a label?

Emotions are felt as sensation in the body, experience. Maybe following a thought or experience. So the emotion, felt sense of in body/heart. In the vastness is separate from I'ing, selfing thoughts. Before the walls came down ...

Hi Vimalasara

I spent hours writing a reply,something happened when I hit submit...I was not logged in anymore and it's all gone. It's midnight so I will have to write tomorrow. I'm sorry. Here is what I had per-written.


Your qu: what is going on in your life that conflicts with reality?
I feel ...

hi Vimalasara

. What scuppered you? .

I wanted there to be some level of choice in thought, there wasn't.

What if there was no story?
What would it feel like not to have a story when (what you label as fail or something) ?
What would be happening if there was no story?

The stories. These ...

Hello Vimalasara

great to see things moving - I must admit your last para - had me thinking -- had to let go of that - as there is no thinking and just thoughts arising and ceasing- Was not sure if you believed in the 'good trick or not'.[\quote]

I meant that the story thought (I do, or I'm crap ...

Hi Vimalasara

so if you were not attached to this illusion of self - what would happen?

My experience was that the car still drives, without a driver. But I was not actually driving when I had that experience. I was laying on my bed on retreat. I used the analogy of the car driving along and ...