Hi Xain,

That's great.I'm glad that other guides have had a look and are confident in the work we've done together.

i really want to say a heartfelt thank you to you for our dialogue, your clarity and support. It looks like you do a lot of guiding. It's such an act of generosity.

I'm also very ...

Hi Xain,

The answers, part two...


4) Was there something specific you looked into or something that was mentioned that made you fully realise? - Was there a specific moment where you 'tipped over' into realising 'no self'?

I think there were 2 or 3 key points. One was the day i realised, more ...

Hi Xain,

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form (other than in the content of thoughts of course)? Was there ever?

No, it's quite clear that there isn't any such entity anywhere. There never was and there never will be. (I guess looking at ...

Hi Xain,

Well, I've had a good look around, to make sure, and I don't have any questions. You put the situation very clearly when you say:

or is any suggestion of 'I' only found in the content of thoughts that appear (which creates the illusion).

Yes, that's what I see. So I don't have any ...

Hi Xain,

So at this stage are you confident that you have realised 'no self' (broken the first fetter?)

Yes, I am. Still though, there's a desire to make as sure as possible, to look into the ways that the mind/body is responding, and double-check that the question of 'no self' is settled once ...

Hi Xain,

Welcome back.

I said:

Then occasionally there's a sense of being a 'me' again, and needing to make things happen in a particular way.

And you responded:
Well perhaps there might be thoughts appearing suggesting a 'me' is making things happen.
But how do you mean 'a sense'?

By 'a ...

Hello again Xain,

I hope you had a very good time on retreat. I thought I'd give you a brief update on the last 10 days, for whenever you're ready to pick things up again. I've carried on the explorration process, not in a very systematic way, but looking at what is happening whenever a sense of ...

Hi Xain,

You quoted me saying:

Ok. The reason I'm here is to get free of the weird and wonderful ideas I have about how things are.

and replied:
The guidance isn't about reinforcing your beliefs - It is about examining them.

But I don't get why you said that... I'm working on the basis that ...

Don't know.

A sense of 'I' is there when there are thoughts about self, but they're just thoughts.

Or sometimes even when there are no thoughts found, there's a sense of tightening around something, as if there was an emotional equivalent of 'thoughts about me'. But they're just feelings and ...

Hi Xain,

Your comments and replies to the guidance are quite strange.

Ok. The reason I'm here is to get free of the weird and wonderful ideas I have about how things are.

You just said that choice, choosing and decision are all concepts.
You then said 'They decided'.

Well, we're stuck with ...

Hi Xain,

You wondered about what I meant when I said:

However, on the relative level, karma still has to mean something...

Well, i don't really want to get into a level of discussion which might take us away from actual experience. Let's just say that I've known some people who feel they've ...

Hi Xain,

Thanks for the latest hrlpful comments. I appreciate all the time you give to doing this.

I said:

OK, it's clear that there is an idea of a person here, but the experience isn't happening 'to' anyone; it's just happening.

And you replied:

Ok, good.
Again, touching on what I ...

We'll do 'control' first.

Here's a very simple exercise you can do while sat down.

Choose one of the hands, it doesn't matter which. Actively make a choice of one hand or the other.
Then when you've chosen one and you feel you wish to, raise that hand into the air.

Do this as many times as you ...

Hi Xain,

Good, it feels like we're making progress. (ok, I know, no-one is making progress...)

Not much time for this today, so I'll just look into the first part of what you wrote, and leave 'control' for tomorrow.

Right now there is 'an experience' or perhaps 'experience'.
Is the experience ...

Hi Xain,

Thanks for the encouraging feedback.

Would it be acceptable to say that it is only an IDEA that there was a person having two separate experiences?
Or is the belief that there really was a person with these two things?

I'm clear, whenever I look into it, that there's only an idea of a ...