Help seeing through self experientially

[seasidealive]

Hi Rali,

You are already standing where nothing stands.
Burn in it. Laugh in it. Let the mystery take you.

So beautiful...

We have some checkpoint questions. Would you like to answer these?

Of course.

All the best
Marc

[poppyseed]

Hi Marc

Here are the checkpoints. These are not tests or grades — they’re simply a way to look again from different angles and confirm that the seeing holds steady in ordinary life. Take your time answering them, directly from experience, not memory or logic. Please answer what's true for you rather than any sort of 'ideal' answer

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

5) Describe decision & give examples from experience.

Describe intention & give examples from experience.

Describe free will & give examples from experience.

Describe choice & give examples from experience.

Describe control & give examples from experience.

What makes things happen? How does it work?

What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

6) Anything to add?

Keep it simple. Short, lived examples beat long explanations.

Love
Rali

[seasidealive]

Hi Rali,

Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No, there is not and there never was.

Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

A pattern in thinking in which a point of reference is created by the term ‘I’/‘me’ that reflects on every experience. Self-reinforced by accruing stories that all revolve around the self. Can’t say when it started for ‘me’ but just watching children grow up, there is a point when they start to refer to themselves as ‘I’ instead of 3rd person. 1 year olds still believe that everything is One, no subject or object...According to my memory, I never liked my name nor my face as a child. But that has become a story itself, so not sure anymore how it really was.

How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

Just more present, open, accepting. There is a lot less thinking going on, entire thought patterns (self talk/arguing, commenting, narrating) simply stopped. Occasionally is tries to come back but it does not hold. The word 'I' in thought is often followed by a brief pause of silence. It’s a lot clearer, how the mind reaches, tries to grasp & hold but it does not have that much ‘glue’ anymore and thoughts pass 'less hindered'. There is more ‘distance’ between a sensation in the body and emotion thoughts. Now, everything just happens and that’s perfectly ok.

What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

Through investigation, it became clear that there were 3 sticking points: fear of letting go, desire to control and the need to seek. The first one dropped shortly after the start of the conversation. The latter 2 fell together after questioning everything, literally everything that came up. There was a point of great frustration and not giving up. Then, I watched a conversation between Ilona and someone about control and repeated the questioning but softer this time, there was a moment when it just dropped like dead weight followed by frantic laughing for minutes :D. With that, the need to seek also just went.

Describe decision & give examples from experience.

A thought claiming ownership after the fact

Describe intention & give examples from experience.

A thought label of agency to something that just is

Describe free will & give examples from experience

:D. No such thing

Describe choice & give examples from experience

No such thing either :)

What makes things happen? How does it work?

Nothing makes things happen, it just is. No need to know how it works.

What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

There is no agent, there is no one responsible.

Anything to add?

Still so very grateful, thank you Rali for being and the help looking. It had to happen exactly the way it did.

All the best
Marc

[poppyseed]

Hi Marc
Wonderful clarity! I will pass your answers to the other guides to check if we've missed anything, so please stay tuned.
Love
Rali

[poppyseed]

Hi Marc
Welcome home!

It appears that the Gateless Gate has been crossed, but as you know there is no Gate, no one to cross it, and no end to the journey. It has been such a pleasure to walk beside you! Your openness and willingness to look were simply awesome and made guiding you a joy. Of course it is not necessarily the end of our conversation.

There have been no more questions for you, which means that you will receive an email notifying you of a PM from the forum, inviting you to join LU's Facebook groups. It also has other information that might be of interest to you. I will inbox you my contact details if you want to stay in touch. If you have any questions, just ask, or you can drop a line on your thread here and I will respond.

Your username will change from green to blue. This thread will be moved to the ‘Archive’ section of the forum, but you will be able to access it.

Please don’t forget that this is just the beginning of exploring. It’s the beginning of cleaning up of all sorts of old beliefs. Emotions and feelings can show up to be seen and felt, so don’t stop looking! Please feel free to contact me, so we can have a look together, if you like.

You can also consider being a guide, if you’re willing to explore it, when you feel ready. It can be very rewarding and it help you deepen your understanding.

We have a couple of support groups that are meeting via teleconference, which you will be able to access once your name has turned blue, join in any group discussions on FB, or make use of LU online support groups run by senior guides free of charge.

There are three of those, and they meet on Zoom – do contact the organisers for extra info, links and schedules:
1) Vince runs one on Wednesdays and weekends. Contact: vinceschubert@gmail.com
2) Luchana and Lubo run one on Thursdays. Contact: Luchana at luchanauzunova@gmail.com
3) Ilona holds a monthly meeting. Contact: admin@ilonaciunaite.com

viewforum.php?f=49

You can also explore the ten Fetters, which is a structured way of approaching beliefs:
Kevin Shinilac has instructions on his site https://www.simplytheseen.com/

Pernille Damore and Todd Lent https://www.youtube.com/@TheAwakeningCurriculum

Love
Rali