Requesting Xian or Ilona

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Alexander
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Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Alexander » Sun Aug 28, 2016 2:21 am

What brings you to Liberation Unleashed?:
I first perceived that there was no "I" a number of years ago, and have been delving into the inquiry again recently. I feel like it is perceived but would like to ensure it is seen all the way through. I find it difficult to articulate and feel that walking through the process you offer would offer me the ability to deeply inquire, verify, express and to receive clear, direct reflection along the way. I'm happy to start from the beginning and to leave no stone unturned.

What are you looking for? What do you expect from this?:
I am looking for clarity, certainty and direct seeing. I want to be able to express my experience, i feel like this would offer greater integration. I expect to receive clear questions, direct responses and reflection. I expect to hone my perception and clear up any misperceptions.

What is your background in terms of seeking and inquiry?:
I have been seeking for over 20 years. Greatest influencers have been Bentinho Massaro, Eckhart Tolle, Adyashanti, Abraham Hicks, Bashar, Mooji.

How ready are you to question your beliefs about who you are and see the truth no matter what?: 11

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Xain
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Xain » Sun Aug 28, 2016 7:31 pm

Hi Alexander

Welcome to LU - And thanks for messaging me.
I spoke with Ilona and she is busy right now but I have time to guide you if you like.
I will reply more tomorrow when I have more time.

Best wishes for the moment
Xain ♥

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Xain
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Xain » Mon Aug 29, 2016 3:51 pm

I first perceived that there was no "I" a number of years ago, and have been delving into the inquiry again recently. I feel like it is perceived but would like to ensure it is seen all the way through. I find it difficult to articulate and feel that walking through the process you offer would offer me the ability to deeply inquire, verify, express and to receive clear, direct reflection along the way. I'm happy to start from the beginning and to leave no stone unturned.
Ok, that's fair.
When you first realised there was no inherently existing separate self, was this through LU guidance, or elsewhere?
At that time, what was clear? What exactly was realised (put it in your own words).

Where do you believe the problem is (and further guidance is needed)?
What expectations do you have (and why)?
I want to be able to express my experience
I am not clear on what you mean here. Could you explain to clarify for me?

Best wishes to you
Xain ♥

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Josephine
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Josephine » Wed Aug 31, 2016 10:07 pm

Hi Xain,

Thanks so much for the reply.
When you first realised there was no inherently existing separate self, was this through LU guidance, or elsewhere?
At that time, what was clear? What exactly was realised (put it in your own words).
It was elsewhere, via Mooji's prompt, "Who perceives the perceiver?" It was clear that there was/is nothing, untouched by story, thoughts, ideas. That what I had been searching for was here the whole time - existence itself, infinity, oneness. When i looked for a "person" I could not find it.
Where do you believe the problem is (and further guidance is needed)?
Good question. Today my request feels like much ado about nothing :)

When i wrote my request I had just had a conversation with someone who expresses themselves very precisely and articulately. We had both been reading gatecrashers at the same time. In articulating my experience he was arguing with my use of words and questioning whether there is clear seeing since (to him) my words didn't truly convey the seeing (I was talking about the state of no-self using the word "I", which I personally don't think is a big deal and talking in advaita/imperonal semantics feels strange).
He was arguing that it was not logical that a person could not articulate what they know precisely - if they clearly knew it.

It's a fair point - and It triggered doubt and inadequacy in me. I turned it into a problem - that maybe there was something missing because my words aren't as precise. That maybe there was a "fragmentation" between my experience and my intellect and I need to integrate/marry the two. But now I don't care. It's another story, a striving to "be something more". In general there's been a repetitive story of "not expressing properly" and a fear to express myself so It's an energy pattern i need to inquire into. This is what I meant by "I want to be able to express my experience" - that i want to be able to clearly, easily, freely communicate and to put clear words to what I perceive; - And i do, when I'm at ease and when the story of not being able to express isn't believed :)

I ultimately don't think further guidance is needed. When there's no self, it's all so obvious, simple and nothing is required, nothing is lacking...and today I'm in tune with the knowing that it's all good. It's all included. It can't not be. There's no inclination to argue with anything that arises. It doesn't make sense. There's nothing more I can be or have to be. It's already here.

There's still often identification and belief in a story and I'm sure it's par for the course. Of course, I'd love for the sense of oneness and no self to be my everyday experience, but feeling ok with it NOT being my everyday waking experience (and potentially ever being) in the last few weeks has been such a relaxing reorientation :)
In general it feels like something has loosened its grip and there are many thoughts that don't have the same allure as they once did.

So again, my initial request feels like much ado about nothing. A reaction to a story. Apologies. That said, anything you feel you want to share, comment, inquire into is totally welcome. And I'm happy to wrap up the conversation too.

Warmest,
Alexander

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Xain
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Xain » Thu Sep 01, 2016 12:12 am

Hi Alexander
In articulating my experience he was arguing with my use of words and questioning whether there is clear seeing since (to him) my words didn't truly convey the seeing (I was talking about the state of no-self using the word "I", which I personally don't think is a big deal and talking in advaita/imperonal semantics feels strange).
I am fully aware with what you refer to as 'impersonal advaita semantics'.

There is nothing wrong with the use of the word 'I', providing it is fully understood what the word represents (or does not represent, as the case may be).
I maintain that using impersonal descriptions 'For example, 'Writing was done, but there was no writer' is a misunderstanding and an error - However, someone who has only recently come to the realisation of 'no self' might fall into this without fully understanding their mistake.
He was arguing that it was not logical that a person could not articulate what they know precisely - if they clearly knew it.
Like I mentioned above, it would depend on exactly what they have realised. A person can only communicate what appears correct for them at any given time . . . and people change, and may come to realise more things further down the line.

Perhaps we could explore this area together to ensure your own realisation is 'known precisely'.

Feel free to use normal language here with me - Please try to keep your descriptions simple without too many (or none at all) spiritual concepts and ideas. This will help us both to understand one another.
When there's no self, it's all so obvious, simple and nothing is required, nothing is lacking...and today I'm in tune with the knowing that it's all good.
Please could you explain as fully as you can what you mean by that?
Maybe give some examples.
Of course, I'd love for the sense of oneness and no self to be my everyday experience, but feeling ok with it NOT being my everyday waking experience (and potentially ever being) in the last few weeks has been such a relaxing reorientation :)
Again, could you explain what you mean here as fully as you can - Examples of what you mean would help also.
That said, anything you feel you want to share, comment, inquire into is totally welcome.
My initial 'reading between the lines' of what you have written is telling me that there may be areas which need addressing and that your realisation might not be fully clear - This is nothing to worry about of course, and I am more than happy to chat together until things are fully clear for you.

Xain ♥

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Alexander
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Alexander » Sat Sep 03, 2016 11:07 pm

Hi Xain,

Many thanks for your reply and for your insights on the conversation i had.

Thanks for the quest
My initial 'reading between the lines' of what you have written is telling me that there may be areas which need addressing and that your realisation might not be fully clear - This is nothing to worry about of course, and I am more than happy to chat together until things are fully clear for you.
Great, thanks so much for the questions and for the willingness to ensure things are clear. Appreciate your honesty.
When there's no self, it's all so obvious, simple and nothing is required, nothing is lacking...and today I'm in tune with the knowing that it's all good.

Please could you explain as fully as you can what you mean by that?
Maybe give some examples.
What i mean is that in a state of no-self, there is a feeling of ease and simplicity. It is obvious that there is nothing for an "I" to do, that nothing is missing. It feels as though life is living, not that "I" am managing or controlling life. That gives rise to a feeling of wellbeing.
Example... Going to lunch with my partner, at the restaurant, everything feels alive and light. There is no sense of having to "be" anything, to "do" anything. There is a sense of everything being one fabric. Orders are made, conversation happens, eating is happening.
Or washing the dishes, there's a hand washing a plate with a sponge, the body hunched over the sink, traffic noises, thoughts arising, all happening.
Of course, I'd love for the sense of oneness and no self to be my everyday experience, but feeling ok with it NOT being my everyday waking experience (and potentially ever being) in the last few weeks has been such a relaxing reorientation :)

Again, could you explain what you mean here as fully as you can - Examples of what you mean would help also.
I mean that I have generally made the sense of self a problem in my journey. Because it still existed, it meant that I wasn't "there yet" or complete. I have been attentive to the fact that it's ok if there is a "person" here, it's ok if there is identification- which has felt like a relief from the point of view of constantly trying to get "rid" of self. That it is all essentially arising in a space of no self.

To be honest tho, these days the idea that "it's ok" feels like a permission slip to stay identified with the story rather than direct looking to see what lies behind the thoughts.

Not sure if either of these is enough explanation. :)

Thanks so much Xain,

Alexander

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Xain
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Xain » Mon Sep 05, 2016 2:18 pm

HI Alexander

Thanks for your reply, and for elaborating on what you meant.
Let me try and assist you now with a few pointers, so you understand where I am coming from.
What i mean is that in a state of no-self, there is a feeling of ease and simplicity. It is obvious that there is nothing for an "I" to do, that nothing is missing. It feels as though life is living, not that "I" am managing or controlling life. That gives rise to a feeling of wellbeing.
I understand what you mean.
The possible problem with your description is that you are describing a particular 'state'. A 'state of no self'.
Obviously that would mean there is a self, an 'I', a person either in this state or not in this state.
It's good when 'I am in this state' and not good when 'I am not in this state'.

But you see this guidance and the realisation we are aiming for here is to see that there is never an 'I' in ANY state.
The guidance is not about achieving a particular state. It is about seeing there there is no inherently existing self, no real 'Alexander' - There never has been - There never will be.
Whatever is coming up - Whatever 'state' appears to be present, there is no separate self experiencing it!
Does that make sense? Can you see the problem with what you have written with this in mind?
I mean that I have generally made the sense of self a problem in my journey. Because it still existed, it meant that I wasn't "there yet" or complete. I have been attentive to the fact that it's ok if there is a "person" here, it's ok if there is identification- which has felt like a relief from the point of view of constantly trying to get "rid" of self. That it is all essentially arising in a space of no self.
It is fine to talk normally in this discussion - I will understand what you mean.
Of course, I understand what you mean by 'your journey' in normal understanding.

But similar to what I described above, the full realisation we are aiming for here to to realise that 'my journey' is entirely fictional. It is entirely based on self-referencing beliefs, thoughts and mis-perceptions.
That right here, right now there is no 'I', there is no Alexander' on a journey. There never has been - There never will be.
This is not about a person losing a sense of self. It is about realising there is no person - No self - AT ALL.

There is nothing to get rid of. All that can be done is to realise it's all been an illusion all along.
To be honest tho, these days the idea that "it's ok" feels like a permission slip to stay identified with the story rather than direct looking to see what lies behind the thoughts.
Either is OK. Life is to be enjoyed. Sometimes we go 'deep looking' for things - Other times we relax on a beach - Other times we are having an argument with our Boss or Partner.
But all along, there is never a self involved.

The full and true realisation would be that there is no self, no 'Alexander' reading these words right now!

What is your opinion of what I have said?

Xain ♥

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Alexander
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Alexander » Mon Sep 05, 2016 7:42 pm

Hi Xain,

Thanks so much. You're right. There has been an orientation from an idea of the self experiencing certain states and a judgement on "good" and "bad" states as a reflection of how well "I'm" doing. It's exhausting :)

"Non doing" or "no self" has become another state for the sense of self to achieve rather than being what "is".
But you see this guidance and the realisation we are aiming for here is to see that there is never an 'I' in ANY state. The guidance is not about achieving a particular state. It is about seeing there there is no inherently existing self, no real 'Alexander' - There never has been - There never will be.
Whatever is coming up - Whatever 'state' appears to be present, there is no separate self experiencing it!
Does that make sense? Can you see the problem with what you have written with this in mind?
This does make sense and tears are flowing right now - for the relief of it.
And there's disbelief/doubt "i'm never going to get it", that "yeah, but the sense of self is still here", "It's too hard". I see they're all thoughts, I see there's no Alexander but It's not satisfying, it's not enough. i'm still convinced that there's someone here.
That right here, right now there is no 'I', there is no Alexander' on a journey. There never has been - There never will be.
This is not about a person losing a sense of self. It is about realising there is no person - No self - AT ALL.

There is nothing to get rid of. All that can be done is to realise it's all been an illusion all along.
Yes, I see. the orientation has been of a person, wanting to "empty" out, wanting to expand, wanting to transcend the self, to be impersonal. That there's nothing to get rid of is such a relief. A huge weight lifted.

It is seen and again, feel the desire to be totally convinced of it. It's mistrust/doubt... "yeah but the sense of self will come back", "yeah but how i actually live from this space?" which is again the "I" claiming a state :)
The full and true realisation would be that there is no self, no 'Alexander' reading these words right now!
This feels so light, so true, so "of course". I see this. AND there's a feeling of not being fully convinced - like it's not "enough".

I really appreciate your reply and this exchange. I've just reread your words and feel like there's more understanding. I'll keep re reading :)

Thanks so much,

Alexander

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Xain
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Xain » Mon Sep 05, 2016 8:03 pm

I really appreciate your reply and this exchange. I've just reread your words and feel like there's more understanding. I'll keep re reading :)
No problem - I am happy to help.
i'm still convinced that there's someone here.
That is very honest. And your own honesty in looking into this will bring rewards.
You realise there is more to examine.
Just be honest with me and most importantly, honest with yourself.
Yes, I see. the orientation has been of a person, wanting to "empty" out, wanting to expand, wanting to transcend the self
The only thing to be done is to see / realise that there is nothing to transcend - And no-one to do it either :)
Until then, of course, we can say there is work to be done - I can guide you and assist you.
It is seen and again, feel the desire to be totally convinced of it. It's mistrust/doubt... "yeah but the sense of self will come back", "yeah but how i actually live from this space?" which is again the "I" claiming a state :)
The guidance here will leave you in a place where you are 100% certain there is no self, no real 'I', no real 'Alexander'.
Nothing else will do. When this is realised, there is no possibility of 'forgetting it'.

And yes - I see you understand - A sense of self can only 'come back' to a self. 'Living in this space' is only possible for a self.
Forgetting something or remembering something is only possible for a self.

Many people liken it to Santa Claus. When we are young we truly believe in Santa. When we get older, we lose this belief.
We can't go back to truly believing a man can deliver presents to 4 billion people in 24 hours.
When it is seen that 'I' is an illusion, it is not possible to go back to believing it's real even again.

Xain ♥

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Alexander
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Alexander » Tue Sep 06, 2016 6:54 am

Hi Xian,
The only thing to be done is to see / realise that there is nothing to transcend - And no-one to do it either :)
Until then, of course, we can say there is work to be done - I can guide you and assist you.

Thanks so much. I'm dedicated to seeing this fully - that's there's nothing to transcend and no one to do it.
The guidance here will leave you in a place where you are 100% certain there is no self, no real 'I', no real 'Alexander'.
Nothing else will do. When this is realised, there is no possibility of 'forgetting it'.
Awesome. Bring it on :)

Thanks so much,

Alexander

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Xain
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Xain » Tue Sep 06, 2016 3:34 pm

Ok, just some quick ground rules.

Please try to post at least once per day - This is important to try to maintain a 'momentum' in the guiding.
If you know you won't be able to reply for a day or two, just let me know beforehand.
For this guidance, put aside all non-dual and religious beliefs and ideas. The guidance is to be approached very simply addressing what you TRULY BELIEVE, and not what some teacher has told you is the right answer, or from what you have read in a book.
Answer my questions honestly from what you can find or cannot find in our investigation, and not what you think I want to hear, or what you think 'the right answer really is'. You are only going to achieve a realisation by being completely honest with me, and yourself.

This guidance has only one objective - To realise there is no inherently existing self, usually termed 'I' or 'Me' or 'Alexander'.
I use the word 'inherently' meaning completely independant - Existing of itself - Here and now.

So what do you believe right now that the word 'I' points to.
Just to give you an idea of the 'simple' nature we are addressing things here, do you believe that right now 'I am looking at a screen and reading some text off it'
Do you believe 'I' points to 'the body' located here.
Do you believe that 'I' (being the body) is responsible for the senses, so 'I hear', 'I feel', 'I see' etc
Do you believe that 'I' controls the body, 'I move my head', 'I control my fingers when typing'
Do you believe that 'I' has choice and free-will, 'I chose to begin this conversation', 'I will choose what to type as a reply to this message'
Do you believe that 'I' has some control over thoughts and performs the thinking process, and that the thoughts are witnessed by 'I', 'I think', 'I had a thought the other day', 'I am thinking what the right answer is'.

Those are a few ideas - Feel free to reject them if they don't work for you, or expand fully what your own beliefs are about these things.

What is 'I'? What does the word 'I' point to?

Xain ♥

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Alexander
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Alexander » Wed Sep 07, 2016 12:34 am

Ok great,

Thanks for the guidelines. Willing to commit and be totally honest.
So what do you believe right now that the word 'I' points to.
Just to give you an idea of the 'simple' nature we are addressing things here, do you believe that right now 'I am looking at a screen and reading some text off it'
Do you believe 'I' points to 'the body' located here.
Do you believe that 'I' (being the body) is responsible for the senses, so 'I hear', 'I feel', 'I see' etc
Do you believe that 'I' controls the body, 'I move my head', 'I control my fingers when typing'
Do you believe that 'I' has choice and free-will, 'I chose to begin this conversation', 'I will choose what to type as a reply to this message'
Do you believe that 'I' has some control over thoughts and performs the thinking process, and that the thoughts are witnessed by 'I', 'I think', 'I had a thought the other day', 'I am thinking what the right answer is'.

Those are a few ideas - Feel free to reject them if they don't work for you, or expand fully what your own beliefs are about these things.
So Intellectually I know that "I" does none of these things but yes, I believe "I" points to an operating machine that is reading this screen, typing these words, operating this body. I believe that I have free will and choice (and am a little attached to this idea - "why are here otherwise?") I believe that I witness thoughts and had a thought yesterday.

I have been living empowerment teachings for the last few years, i.e. choosing your own frequency, creating your own reality, setting intentions and from that point of view it all seems so true - that there is a creative mechanism via intention and focus; that i have a choice about how I feel and when I feel that, circumstances reflect. It feels like I DO have control and I am choosing.

"I" points to an Alexander, choosing, living, creating his own life.

Warmest,

Alexander

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Xain
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Xain » Wed Sep 07, 2016 8:45 am

So Intellectually I know that "I" does none of these things but yes, I believe "I" points to an operating machine that is reading this screen, typing these words, operating this body.
Thank you - Good. And also very honest.
I was at a similar place to you when I came to LU - Intellectually 'knowing' that there was no 'I' doing these things, but no deep realisaton that this was the case.
I have been living empowerment teachings for the last few years, i.e. choosing your own frequency, creating your own reality, setting intentions and from that point of view it all seems so true
I would ask you for the rest of our guidance together to refrain from following any specific teachings, as it may hamper what we are trying to do - Or you may try to integrate your understanding from one teaching into the guidance here which isn't going to work.
Straight-away you can see that . . . if your previous teachings were focussing on 'choosing things', then this is going to clash with this guidance which is to leave you with a 100% certain realisation that no 'I' has ever chosen anything.

Let us begin the guidance with 'I am this body'.
This belief is mainly held in place by the ideas that the body (being 'me') is responsible for the senses. The body 'performs' the senses. 'I see', 'I hear', 'I feel' etc

Let us begin with 'Seeing'.

This is a very simple introductory exercise to try to get you to focus on the senses. One at a time.
In each exercise I will ask you to answer ONLY from what you can find, or what is clear to you in that one sense only.
So please do not answer from what you find using the other senses, or from what you think might be the correct answer, or from previous study or teachings. Be completely honest - Just look and answer from what you can or cannot find using the one sense that we are examining. Answer from what is clear (or answer that something is not clear if you are confused).

'Seeing'.
Close your eyes.
Where you were seeing a room, a screen, a keyboard etc, now you just see 'black' - 'Darkness',
If you are close to a bright light, the darkness might not be completely 'black' - It might have a dull red glow.
Also, there might be sparkly or cloudy floaty things (maybe caused by nerves) but don't worry about that.
I am going to refer to this new experience as simply 'Darkness'. So 'What is seen' is 'Darkness'.

1) Check that the only thing you find is 'Darkness' as I described - Is that the case?
2) Just check . . . is there anything else that can be found in 'seeing' other than 'Darkness'?
3) Can what is witnessing this Darkness be found in the seeing itself? Or is there just 'Darkness'?
4) Can a body or an 'I' or an Alexander be found that is performing a function called 'seeing'?
5) Can a body or an 'I' or an Alexander be found that is experiencing the Darkness?

What can be found?

Xain ♥

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Alexander
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Alexander » Wed Sep 07, 2016 10:39 pm

Hi
So Intellectually I know that "I" does none of these things but yes, I believe "I" points to an operating machine that is reading this screen, typing these words, operating this body.

Thank you - Good. And also very honest.
I was at a similar place to you when I came to LU - Intellectually 'knowing' that there was no 'I' doing these things, but no deep realisaton that this was the case.
Thanks. great to know you were in the same place. I have believed and do still that I know what awareness is, what perceives the perceiver; "Infinity" if you will, and from that I can see there's no person ultimately, but I do still believe there's a person here.
I would ask you for the rest of our guidance together to refrain from following any specific teachings, as it may hamper what we are trying to do - Or you may try to integrate your understanding from one teaching into the guidance here which isn't going to work.
Straight-away you can see that . . . if your previous teachings were focussing on 'choosing things', then this is going to clash with this guidance which is to leave you with a 100% certain realisation that no 'I' has ever chosen anything.
Ok great. Good to know. I am working/socializing everyday with a teacher and a group who are engaged in these empowerment teachings so just beginning to explore this seriously has raised alot of fear/confusion and I have already begun to strategize on how I can integrate the two :) I have been unhappy and in a funk for quite a while and just this morning have begun to feel better focussing on appreciation/feeling good. These empowerment teachings are all about feeling good - which means being in alignment with higher self/broader perspective and therefore being in greater "flow". So there's fear around not focussing on "my" alignment. Letting go of not "feeling good" brings fear that I'm not "taking responsibility" for my vibration. I feel fear in exploring this, like there's nothing really here and I'll go back to my lifeless days of advaita, sitting on the couch, not interested in the world but also know there's something to truly be curious about and explore... and ultimately nothing to lose. Just sharing to let you know of my current context and headspace but my answer is yes, I'll commit to focusing on this guidance. And to clarify, does that mean I am to not focus on changing my perspective if I know I am seeing things from an "old" or misguided viewpoint? And is it that I don't focus on positive emotions at all?
1) Check that the only thing you find is 'Darkness' as I described - Is that the case?
2) Just check . . . is there anything else that can be found in 'seeing' other than 'Darkness'?
3) Can what is witnessing this Darkness be found in the seeing itself? Or is there just 'Darkness'?
4) Can a body or an 'I' or an Alexander be found that is performing a function called 'seeing'?
5) Can a body or an 'I' or an Alexander be found that is experiencing the Darkness?
1.Ignoring all the floaty things, yes, all i see is darkness
2. No, nothing else can be found but darkness
3 There is just Darkness
4 There is nothing performing the function called "Seeing"
5 No there is no body or Alexander experiencing the Darkness.

There is darkness. Darkness is happening. There is no body attached it to, nothing "making" it happen and no "I" needed for it to happen.

I experienced ALOT of resistance doing this exercise which was insightful; "This is boring", "I don't want to".
It tells me there's something worth exploring.

Thanks so much.

Alexander

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Xain
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Re: Requesting Xian or Ilona

Postby Xain » Thu Sep 08, 2016 10:12 am

There is darkness. Darkness is happening. There is no body attached it to, nothing "making" it happen and no "I" needed for it to happen.
Ok, 'Darkness is happening' doesn't really make sense to me. Is this a way of speaking that you use in other practises?
It is enough just to say 'in seeing, all that can be found is darkness'.
If you say 'darkness is happening', to me that sounds like there is some sort of thing making darkness happen.
It could just be a confusion of words / understanding between us.
4 There is nothing performing the function called "Seeing"
5 No there is no body or Alexander experiencing the Darkness.
Let me just offer you a slight difference.

Would it be more honest to say 'In the experiment, I could not find anything performing a function called 'seeing', nor could I find a body, an 'I', or an Alexander experiencing the darkness'?'
At this stage, it is enough just to be really honest and say what appears to be the case.
Saying 'there is nothing doing it' or 'there is nobody experiencing it' is a positive claim. It means you have looked into the specific location where seeing is being done and have found it to be empty (there's nobody there)'
I don't want to put 'words in your mouth', so feel free to disagree with what I am saying.
Not sure if that makes sense to you or not, but the wording can be important for your own understanding, and I'd sooner get this little area cleared up before going on.
I experienced ALOT of resistance doing this exercise which was insightful; "This is boring", "I don't want to".
It tells me there's something worth exploring.
This is the very first exercise. All of the exercises are very simple. It depends on how much you want to see 'no self'.
This level of investigation (going into emotions) isn't really needed, but it's OK to mention these things.
Just go through the exercises one by one with me, and let's see what can be discovered.

Xain ♥


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