When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heaven!

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oldyeller
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When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heaven!

Postby oldyeller » Fri Jan 22, 2016 12:13 pm

What brings you to Liberation Unleashed?

I'm 68 yrs old.. live in northern Canada & seems like I've been a seeker of truth always but serious the last few yrs & progressing to desperation :). I was learning from what I felt a good teacher on youtube plus one particularly good book. Next step?.. go half way across the globe for a guru?.. I just can't. I'm not a great traveler & I care for my disabled husband. Besides I felt instinctively that shouldn't be necessary. When I read some of LU.. my reaction was 'this can't be true.. is it the real thing?' & I've been learning more about you since then. One tiny question that came up was about the need to agree to posting daily. I'm assuming it's because it's found to be helpful but at the same time I felt it should be more freely done. I seem to need a bit of clarity here.

What are you looking for? What do you expect from this:

I hear it when others say.. 'no expectations' so that's where I'm trying to stay. But I didn't expect the almost unconscious hesitation which has to be fear. So to start I would expect this is quite common & the trust issue would have to be looked at & worked through. On the scale you have of how ready you are for this my 11 is only qualified by the fear between 10 & 11 & I don't feel it to be that strong. I have done a firewalk... does that help?

What I would expect 'hopefully' would be the sudden switch' from not seeing to seeing.. even though it might be subtle & not profound. An example might be the picture which can be seen as 2 urns or jars -OR- 2 faces facing each other... if you're familiar with that one. I say what many others seem to say 'I get it intellectually'. Basically that's it & I understand when you call it the root or the change of lens to seeing through the illusion.

What is your background in terms of seeking and inquiry?

Seeking for me has not included many 'groupy' things. Being an introvert I studied & read almost totally alone at times & I would try to consciously live what I was learning & see what it might change. I do enjoy one-on-one discussions in person because of the feedback of course.. but this way is good because there's no person or time in the way & it can have more 'feeling'. I first heard about self-inquiry from the Nisargadatta material & it seemed others found it good so I've been trying to practice that too but eventually it can become tedious. It never once entered my mind that this brain-child you have created could even happen! I immediately read your 2 books. In the GG one I felt I connected to the others well.. some more than others of course.. & even made some progress. The Look one was harder for me but I'm getting more with repetition.

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Sarah7
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby Sarah7 » Fri Jan 22, 2016 2:59 pm

Hi Old yeller!
I'm Sarah and I'd be happy to speak with you. What would you like me to call you if different from above?
Have you had a chance to look around our site? Do you know what we do here?
Looking forward to speaking with you.
Hugs Sarah xxx
If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.

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oldyeller
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby oldyeller » Mon Jan 25, 2016 3:05 am

Is this where I post the reply. I feel like I have no idea what I'm doing but I'll try it.

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Sarah7
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby Sarah7 » Mon Jan 25, 2016 9:51 am

Hi (what do you want me to call you - old yeller or something else?
Yes this is where you need to reply! Don't worry - you will pick it up! I got my nephew to help me when first I started! So we will start with some housekeeping - OK.

In general, I will ask questions and you look deeply and respond with 100% honesty.

Responses require simple, uncontrived honest looking. There are no wrong or right answers.

Responses are best from direct experience (the physical evidence of seeing, hearing, touching, tasting, and smelling, prior to the story or explanation about them). Long-winded, analytical and philosophical or stream of consciousness answers are best avoided and may even hinder progress. Just listen very closely to the answers that arise in you, and answer to the very best of your ability at that time. (Read the article at http://www.liberationunleashed.com/Arti ... ience.html for more help on distinguishing what is direct experience.)

Please learn to use the quote function, see viewtopic.php?f=4&t=660 for instructions.

Finally, here's a couple of helpful points:
1) You can press 'subscribe to this topic' in the blue bar at the bottom of this page and receive a notification email every time I post here.

2) The site has a nasty habit of logging you out while you write a reply, which can mean you lose what you have written. One way to avoid this is to write elsewhere, then just paste the message into the 'reply' window when you're ready to send? Ok.

Have a little look then let me know when you are good to go! :)
Hugs Sarah xxx
If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.

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oldyeller
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby oldyeller » Mon Jan 25, 2016 7:03 pm

Wow I got through & read your message!... & thanks for the encouragement.. much needed.. & the hints. I haven't a 'nephew' willing to help but will bumble through. What to call me.. prefer my name but other is ok too. (what me? :) Should I be changing my password? Alright I will work with your suggestions for a bit.. then let you know when I'm good to go.

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oldyeller
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby oldyeller » Mon Jan 25, 2016 11:02 pm

I had read some of Lisa's experience but not this long one. I found it to be honest, direct, resourceful & helpful. Your suggestion about writing elsewhere & then sending seems like a good one. I take my time & hate to lose it for sure. Will this quick reply space I'm using now work? I'm going to try to send you one just called 'test' to see ok.

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oldyeller
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby oldyeller » Mon Jan 25, 2016 11:05 pm

'TEST'

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Sarah7
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby Sarah7 » Tue Jan 26, 2016 8:45 am

Hi Yeller
Lets get going then if you are good to go?

How do you think, feel or experience the 'self', 'I' or ‘me’'?

For instance does it feel like its in the centre or middle of experience, is it solid or thick, does it feel fixed or permanent, is it inside the body or part of the body, does it change, does it feel uniquely different and separate, does it become more or less solid or obvious depending on experience, does it have colour or shape or texture, is it small or large, does this self own the body or the thoughts and feelings it experiences?

Is it made up of thoughts and feelings, sensations, emotions, likes and dislikes, opinions, memories and experiences, perceptions, character and personality, does this self decide, chose, act, do and control? Anything else? Is there a time when the self is not experienced?

Now have a really good look and tell me where does the 'self' that you conceive yourself to be reside? Is it in the body as a whole, part of the body or somewhere else? Can you pinpoint an exact reference point? Can it be found, at all?

Can anything exist outside the present moment? Can you find anything that does?

In your direct experience, is there anything permanent right now?
Hugs Sarah xxx
If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.

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oldyeller
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby oldyeller » Wed Jan 27, 2016 7:39 am

Me... I feel it's in my head/body.
I experience it inside & my hand goes to my chest
I think this head learned it's a bundle of thoughts about a me that have come from outside of me (told to me by an environment out there).
Center or middle of experience? yes mostly
Solid or thick? no
Fixed or permanent? no, just there
Inside or part of the body? inside but not part of
Does it change? yes.. moods
Is it unique different or separate? yes... but some doubt
Is it more or less obvious or solid depending on experience? yes being upset brings it out & relaxed makes it less obvious
Color shape texture? no, no, no
Small or large? I don't know... it's just there
Does this self own the body/thoughts/feelings? It sometimes thinks it does from what's around it but mostly they're just there
It's made up of thoughts/feelings etc? yes
Does the self decide choose act do & control? seems like it does
Is there a time when the self is not experienced? sleep, meditation, very alert & listening, beautiful music, harmony
Can you exactly pinpoint where the self is? It seems to be in the body but when I look right at it, it disappears (like a speck in a glass of water)
Can anything exist outside the present moment? no everything is now
Is there anything permanent right now? I sometimes expect things to remain yet I know they're not permanent.

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Sarah7
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby Sarah7 » Wed Jan 27, 2016 9:57 am

OK a little exercise!

Id like you to just sit for 5-10 minutes with a paper and pen and I want you to record everything you notice from your ‘I’ list. I want you to look at what experiences come up, what actions you notice, what labels you see and WHERE they are applied, what feelings and emotions come up, and what sensations arise.
Don’t add to what shows itself, don’t analyse, just plain description. Watch the body for any sensations like relaxing or tightening. Just write me a list like - I am lying in bed, I am hearing the rain, I am writing this list, I can feel a sensation of relaxing etc….

Id like you then to repeat the exercise doing exactly the same as you did above, but this time I don’t want you to use the word ‘I’ or ‘me’ when you write the list of what you notice. Again don’t add to what shows itself, don’t analyse, just plain description. Watch the body for any sensations like relaxing or tightening. Just write me a list like - waiting for the next thought, writing, breathing, listening, relaxing sensation etc…
What do you notice from doing the two looking exercises? Which feels truer?

If you say ‘my money’ and compare it to ‘money’, ‘my relationship’ compared to ‘relationship’ or ‘my time’ compared to ‘time’ – does if feel different? Does one feel heavier than the other?
Hugs Sarah xxx
If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.

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oldyeller
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby oldyeller » Thu Jan 28, 2016 6:28 pm

I am......

- sitting in this chair
- drinking tea
- thinking about the meal to make & what I'll do tomorrow
- fixing this clipboard (label good)
- listening to a dog bark (tension)
- looking out the window at snow & trees (relax)
- thinking about my eyesight (tension)
- thinking about phone calls to make
- planning a meal (tension)
- making a phone call (tension)
- watching the dog walk across the floor (relax)


Noticing......

- no sunshine... disappointment ((tension)
- quiet (relax)
- day is ending
- no hunger
- there are clothes to fold
- an ipad is sitting there
- wind is whistling in the window (relax)
- husband is done excercising
- food is going in a mouth


Which feels truer?

The noticing feels truer because it's already happening. It's not waiting for me to make it happen. Also it feels better because I don't have to do it.. it's already doing... wow freedom... I'm not responsible... this feels good! Realizing this.. I feel somehow a lifting of responsibility.

Which feels heavier? Definitely the 'I' one!

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oldyeller
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby oldyeller » Fri Jan 29, 2016 4:04 am

Sorry Sarah.. i had a little problem with the computer there.. the link wouldn't work for me & I thought I'd lost you. I think we're back again & I await another exercise. Much gratitude for your time & help.............lynda

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Sarah7
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby Sarah7 » Fri Jan 29, 2016 6:10 pm

Hi Lynda
The noticing feels truer because it's already happening. It's not waiting for me to make it happen. Also it feels better because I don't have to do it.. it's already doing... wow freedom... I'm not responsible... this feels good! Realizing this.. I feel somehow a lifting of responsibility. Which feels heavier? Definitely the 'I' one!
Now I want you to look during your day at how labelling happens. See if you can catch ‘I’, ‘I’m’, ‘me’, ‘my’, ‘mine’, ‘I’ve’, etc See if you can see what you apply it too. Is it applied to doing, thinking etc? Is it all the time, most of the time? Give me a rough percentage. Is it like a commentary or like an ownership? Can you see where and when it labels - before, during or after?
Hugs Sarah xxx
If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.

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oldyeller
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby oldyeller » Mon Feb 01, 2016 6:45 am

Is labeling applied to doing, thinking - more to thinking
All or most of the time - most
Percentage - hard to catch but maybe half
Commentary or ownership - more on the commentary side
Labels before, during or after - more before, then after, then during

I found this exercise looks to be simple but it wasn't for me. There seemed to be some resistance to doing it & was difficult to hold my awareness. I have worked with just being aware of ego, which is all of these, I, me, mine etc. So I'm not sure if I need to take more time with this or not......................lynda

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Sarah7
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Re: When I came across LU, I thought it had fallen from heav

Postby Sarah7 » Mon Feb 01, 2016 5:52 pm

Hi Lynda
more to thinking
Do you intentionally bring thoughts? Or do they come and go on their own? If you do bring them from where and how?
Can you send them away, stop them or get rid? Can you suppress your next thought before it arises? Does it work?
Do you know what you're going to think before you think it? Sit quietly for a moment and try to predict your next thought. Does it work?
Do you plan what you are going to think before you think it?
Is there is a thought that you can control?
What can a thought do – what power does it have?
You experience thoughts, but do you experience the content? Is the content real?
Hugs Sarah xxx
If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.


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