Earlier in an email I asked
Let's check our experience to see what its constituent parts are -- can you find anything that cannot be described as a sensation, a thought (including mental images) or a feeling (emotions)?
Now, what does the concept "I" point to in the direct experience of the moment? Is it a thought, a feeling or an emotion? Is it a combination of these? Or is "I" something separate, outside this flow?
Have a look and see. What is "I"?
OK great, so “I” is not a thing or entity separate from the flow of life or experience.“Looking closely at direct experience the 'I' definitely doesn't exist outside this flow of thought , feeling or emotion.”
Sorry you’re not well – but it is actually a great time to look. So you say “aching bones, fever and weakness”—these are still conceptual descriptors of direct experience – try looking again – imagine that you are describing the symptoms to a person who has never been sick in their life – what is “aching” – what is “fever”?“Looking today at the thought ' I am sick' and placing awareness on the body sensations there is definitely no 'I ' existing ...just aching bones, fever and weakness.”
– OK as you turn toward these sensations can you just be with them without judgement? Just allow them to be without any kind of resistance or commentary.“Focusing on 'feeling' it's a bit more difficult to not have the concept 'I' am feeling lousy' arise.”
Now WHERE are they happening? Thoughts say “in my body” – but look closely at the different sensations arising – can you find a dividing line between one sensation and another? Does one sensation feel “closer” than another? If so closer to what? Is there a centre or “point of view” in the experience?
Yes, great.“But with turning to find the entity 'I' it's clear it doesn't exist as a separate entity- it's not to be found.
The place where I notice the 'I' assert itself mostly is in thought.”
OK good. But what is it that labels current experience as “illness”? In direct experience are the arisings associated with the label “illness” a problem? What finds them problematic?“Coming back to the present moment there is only the body felt sense of the illness and any sense an entity 'I' which is worrying is no longer present.”