Looking for a guide

[jad437]

Hello!!

I was wondering if I could speak with a guide. I've seen through the illusion of the self but there is still identification with thoughts and a sense of separation. I guess you could say there have been awakenings ( absence of me), but I still have a strong sense of existing. I'm currently in college right now and in the process of trying to figure out what I need to do with 'my' life. Career path, etc. financial situation of the future and it is becoming so stressful because I see the futility in seeking pleasure and avoiding pain. I'm stuck in this rut of knowing that what I think isn't it, but also believing that there is more to it.

Any guidance would be greatly appreciated.

Best
Julian

[Josephkoudelka]

Hi Julian,

Joseph here. I can guide you.

How can I help you?

Regards,

Joseph

[jad437]

Hiya Joseph,

I'm really confused as to what I should do. There this deep sense of being lost and feeling as if there is something that needs to be done. I feel as if I am missing something but I don't know what. There is a longing for truth, but I cannot find it anywhere.

[Josephkoudelka]

I'm really confused as to what I should do. There this deep sense of being lost and feeling as if there is something that needs to be done. I feel as if I am missing something but I don't know what. There is a longing for truth, but I cannot find it anywhere.

Here at LU I can guide you to realize for yourself two things specifically; that there is no doer, and no self. This will untie the whole bundle of confusion and is really the best medicine.

Are you ready to do that?

Joseph

[jad437]

Yessir! :)

[Josephkoudelka]

Yessir! :)

Ok then :) A couple of formalities are needed to get underway. First - please take a look at http://liberationunleashed.com/nation/v ... f=16&t=221 and acknowledge that you agree and understand.

Second - Here are a few ground rules.

1. You agree to post at least once a day, even if only to say, "still here!"
   I am not your teacher, all I can do is point, you look, until clear seeing happens.
2. In general, I will ask questions, you look deeply and honestly, and respond.
3. Responses require simple, uncontrived honest looking. There are no wrong or right answers.
4. Responses are best from direct experience (felt senses and observed thoughts). Long-winded analytical and philosophical answers, and stream of consciousness answers are best avoided and may even hinder progress.
5. Put aside all other teachings, philosophies and such for the remainder of this investigation. Really put all your effort and attention into seeing this reality, as it is. If you have a daily and essential meditation practice, it is fine to continue that.
6. Please learn to use the quote function; See these instructions

Let me know if you agree to this also.

Thank you! - Joseph

[jad437]

Sounds good to me!

[Josephkoudelka]

Great! In your first post you mentioned:

I've seen through the illusion of the self but there is still identification with thoughts and a sense of separation. I guess you could say there have been awakenings ( absence of me), but I still have a strong sense of existing.

Tell me more about that, your direct experience of seeing through the illusion of self.

[jad437]

Mmm..

There have been brief moments within the last couple of months where all labeling disappearing and there was simply experience happening. Nothing was separate from anything else because thoughts weren't labeling. Then thought came back and tried to understand it...it still does. It really wants to understand the absence of itself. I guess you could say "I' really want to understand the absence of myself when I'm not labeling things and believing thought.

[Josephkoudelka]

In your direct experience, right now, describe thinking.

[jad437]

Thoughts are appearing as I type this. Kind of an ongoing chatter with no mental cessation.

Coming out of nowhere and then disappearing. Not really knowing what the next thought will be.

Just words coming and going. Some describing this experience. There's a table, chair, lamp.

[Josephkoudelka]

Thoughts are appearing as I type this.

In your direct experience what is this "I" that types?

[jad437]

No entity can be found in the direct experience...

There only seems to be an appearance of it in thoughts...but they are just thoughts.

[Josephkoudelka]

Exactly. Thoughts are known. Do thoughts know you?

[jad437]

No :( They know nothing. No matter how hard they try. Or what they try to hold onto in this direct experience. It is all just a mental projection of what is experienced. Not an actual knowing/ understanding of anything. Just witnessing. Thought can't find an entity.. Just another thought saying it feels like "I'm" here.