need a guide to push me

[escoho]

Hi,
I would like to know.

[Paulo]

Hi escoho,

What is it you want to know exactly?

What brings you here to the forum, and what do you hope to find?

Paulo.

[escoho]

I wan to know if I believe I is imaginary or who is searching, somebody seems to be searching, but I can't find them.

[Paulo]

What is it you are searching for? - share a little of your journey so far.

What do you hope to find here at the forum - what do you expect will happen?

Paulo.

[escoho]

I ve done all kinds of raising awareness and being present type of things, listened to lectures of proclaimed enlightened people. And a few moments I thought I seen something. The two significant events were, first I don't remember anything in particular being a trigger to the first one, it didn't seem like a mind generated phenomenon. I just dissapeared for a few hours and it was terrifying. I looked up ego loss on the web and everything I read was seen like I myself wrote it it was kinda like a tease cause I wanted comfort but I was absolutely alone. Later the feeling subsided.
A few months later at work I had a thought and it said to me my experience of life is unique basically, but more than a thought again something became aware of itself and scared the hell out of me me cause I was looking at my hands doing the work and it was just like happening. My legs started walking and they felt different. It was a huge what s going on. Since then I haven't tried explaining it and I am wondering if I am soppossed to feel that way all the time and how I arrived there.
I expect to find somebody to tell me that they know what I am talking about. That's pretty much all. I feel like I found something and am still searching for it.

[Paulo]

Hi escoho,

Many thanks for your response, things are a lot clearer when they have a context.

Since then I haven't tried explaining it and I am wondering if I am soppossed to feel that way all the time and how I arrived there.

What you report experiencing sounds like a state of dissociation. It is perfectly normal for these states to fade away, as they are just states, and as such are temporary. The important thing is not to cling to them, or try to get back to them, or try to recreate them. this is moving away from what is happening in the moment, and is like trying to find the snow that fell last winter - it just isn't there.

I expect to find somebody to tell me that they know what I am talking about. That's pretty much all. I feel like I found something and am still searching for it.

In my experience chasing a state like you describe is like chasing a rainbow - it seems so close, but isn't actually there at all. If you're looking to attain a particular state there are other forums on the internet that can help you do just that. Here, we do something different, we look through the illusion of self, that there is no seperate entity behind the word 'me'.

I recommend you have a look around the forum, at some of the other threads, and certainly at the Frequently Asked Questions link below. If you think this is something that appeals to you let me know.

http://www.liberationunleashed.com/LU_FAQ.html

Love, Paulo.

[escoho]

Thanks Paulo,
I be been visiting this forum for about a year, and many times got that jolt from it, much like a remembering, the state I described I believed to be just the moment it was nothing else, but I have been chasing it and its only a memory. Every once in a while I remember there is no me, right now I could think it, but I am just thinking it, the remembering is just like a laugh, like of course I always knew this.

[Paulo]

Hi escoho,

Allow me to share a little of my story - I too had an 'enlightening' experience many years ago. It didn't last, but I spent many years trying to recreate that experience, to get back there and stay in that state. I travelled the world and explored many different techniques to try to return to that state, but all in vain. I was chasing rainbows. Then I let it go and discovered the real magic in the moment, in the here and now.

I be been visiting this forum for about a year

So why start a dialogue now, or have you previously posted with another name?

Are you going to keep visiting for another year ... and another ... and another? or Do you want to jump in, and stop chasing rainbows?

Paulo.

[escoho]

This is my first posting and I would like you to show me please.

[Paulo]

Good choice escoho -

A few ground rules -

1. Post at least once a day, if you cannot post, or need more time, let me know.
2. Be 100% honest in your answers and inquiry.
3. Answer from personal experience only.
4. Read the disclaimer on the Liberation Unleashed main page - http://www.liberationunleashed.com/
5. Read the FAQ page to get an idea of what we do here - http://www.liberationunleashed.com/LU_FAQ.html
6. Learn how to use the quote function when responded to messages - viewtopic.php?f=4&t=660

Understand that I will be guiding you, rather than teaching you, and the more you put into this process the more you will get out of it.

Let me know that you agree to the above and we can begin -

Paulo

[escoho]

I agree

[Paulo]

Since we have been looking at a past experience, let's start by looking at the present moment -

Consider the statement below -

Nothing exists outside the present moment.

Look as hard as you can, anywhere you like, and see if you can find anything outside the present moment - There's a prize if you do :)

Paulo.

[escoho]

I can't, I can only think of something outside the present moment. There is no bridge. I became hungry and there was no food present, I had to go get the food, but it came into existance because the hunger was there then the will to satiate it. And eventually food was present.

[Paulo]

Hi escoho,

I can only think of something outside the present moment.

What 'time frame' is this thought occuring in?

In your investigation of the present moment, the here and now, did you find an 'I' anywhere?
(Don't speculate of theorise on this one, look with your physical eyes, don't leave any stone unturned)

Paulo.

[escoho]

The thought is in the present,I am not sure if thoughts are even separate or the same thought, that has just changed .
In the present moment I did not find an "I" but enjoyed looking.