MUCH GRATITUDE FOR GUIDANCE

[dws777]

Let me start off by offering my thanks to you wonderful people for providing this amazing resource to those of us looking to awaken to the Truth!
My name is David. I'm 51 and am married with three kids. I have the additional honor of living with 12 awakened beings(2 dogs, 6 cats,2 parrots,1 rabbit, and 1 bearded dragon). The desire to awaken is pretty intense. Life is definetly looking to awaken to life. "I" have no choice in the matter. I am familiar with your web sight and have read Gateless Gatecrashers. It is such a relief to know that there is a more direct way to awaken than the other methods I've investigated. I hope I can directly experience the Truth in a lasting way.
I was raised in the Christian Science religion but have not practiced any religion since the age of 18. At the age of 12 I experienced a spontaneous healing of a medical condition but besides that my spiritual life had been uneventful. Everything changed 2 and a half years ago. My wife and I were going through a very tumultouos time and seemed to be heading towards divorce. At that time I happened to notice a few of my wifes spiritual books and started to read them. Besides newspapers and magazines I had not read any books since my college days so that in itself was odd. After about 2 weeks I suddenly became very expansive and felt at one with the World. At this time many seemingly mystical things also occured.This lasted for almost a 2 month period of time.
After that taste of freedom nothing could ever be the same.In the last 2 years I have read over a hundred books from new age, Angels, reincarnation,Robert Scheinfeld, Tolle,Hicks,The Way of Mastery, etc....I have practiced meditation and have done alot of praying. I just spent 4 days reading and finishing Jed Mckenna's trilogy and I must say that did make me question awaking but like I said before, I have no choice in the matter.
I am ready. I am looking to know the Truth in a lasting way.I thought what I experienced was a true awakening but I guess it wasn't since it didn't last. What a tease!!!!! I need help! Thanks again.....David

[open space]

Hi David,

thank you for sharing all that brought you here and your gratitude.

Love to support what is true and your desire to look here.
Would be happy to be your guide if you wish.

If you haven't already seen it, there is intro info here, our disclaimer and a short video too.

http://www.liberationunleashed.com/

If you could confirm you have seen all the above and would like me to be your guide - then we shall begin.

best wishes,
Coll

[dws777]

Hi Coll, Thanks for replying so quickly. I have reviewed all the material and am ready to begin. I'll be back later to check your response.

thanks again,
David

[dws777]

Hi Coll. I should have asked you how our communication will proceed.What time zone are you in? I want to make sure I post everyday so if you post late it may not be until the next day that I respond.I am flexible so anything is great we me.

See Ya,
David

[open space]

Hi David,

I am pst and often post at night.

Thanks for taking the time to look it over, so lets begin....
here are a few guidelines:

~agree to post daily or email if you are not able;

~please set aside any other spiritual practices during our inquiry together....
instead commit at this time, like a meditation practice, begin looking for this separate self, "I",
what is the experienced through out the day as that happens.

-i will ask questions and you answer....
listen very closely to the answers that arise in u,
as that is the direct path in that no one
else can give directions to.

let me know if you can commit to the above?

If you do agree to the above....
please share what your expectations are to see through the illusion of the separate self,
and any concerns/fears about that?

in gratitude,
Colleen

[dws777]

Hi Colleen,

It's great to hear from you! No problem with committing to above.....Expectations????.....Just to enjoy being the passenger on a smoother ride with a few bumps thrown in for contrast....Fear in general has always been a stickler for me but as of late I've been started to look at it as my friend. It seems to be working better this way although it,s still hanging around.I am EST so I am usually out by midnight so my answers may come the following day.

Look forward to hearing from you!
David

[open space]

Hi David,

may be responding then when sleeping...so love that we get to share
in the sleep and in the wakeness...

Like your expectation...."enjoy being a passenger on a smoother ride with a few bumps thrown in for contrast".
It is like being a passenger and never know what the ride will be, lets see...
stay open and leave all expectations behind...
how does it sound to begin fresh like a newborn and start from there?

If fear arises during our time together...name it..and lets take a look thru it,
love holding it with care as well.

Lets open the door and begin...
so take the time now and in your day to reflect and deeply look inside for this "I", "me",
this separate self you have referred to in life,
is it real or just a thought?
do a full inner walk thru...
can you find anything there that is a separate "self", I to refer to?

loving,
Coll

[dws777]

Good Afternoon Coll,

Starting as a newborn sounds wonderful. There's nothing that needs to be held onto.

The only slight fear below the surface is that the search is coming to an end. It's the way it is, and it's great, buy the "I" has become a little attached to it. The fear of losing identity seems to have subsided though.

The day was spent looking at thoughts.When initial thoughts arose no I was evident.When thoughts would link to other thoughts that seemed to be where the I surfaced. During further investigation no I could be pinpointed. The senses seemed to be on cruise control. Seeing, hearing, smelling, etc..just happening.

That's all for now. I hope you don't mind answers being kind of short. The focus is being put on observation more than writing. Please let me know if this is OK......Thanks, Dave

[dws777]

P.S....The separate self is just a thought all be it a persistant one !

[open space]

Hi David,

YES the observation and experience of this is the key as that allows you know what is
really going on and to see if "one" can be found outside of thought, can one?
here i would ask to describe this in detail...
when looking for this separate self...what is noticed? is anything found?
Is there really a "David" inside there, what if David is just a thought?

The only slight fear below the surface is that the search is coming to an end. It's the way it is, and it's great, buy the "I" has become a little attached to it.

Yes, and where is this "I" that is saying it is attached to searching? is there really one?

and regarding the fear too... there is such a thing as a beginning and an end to this, is that true?

When thoughts would link to other thoughts that seemed to be where the I surfaced. During further investigation no I could be pinpointed. The senses seemed to be on cruise control. Seeing, hearing, smelling, etc..just happening.

Yes no "I' can be pinpointed...beautiful to take in, pause, that is the space to see...stay there...and yes "I" thoughts surface and is there "anyone" doing that?

thank u for diving here...truth will pull u in to look and see...lets see the answers that arise to help u here.
look forward to hearing,
loving,
Coll

[dws777]

Good Evening Colleen,

" if "one" can be found outside of thought, can one? When looking for this separate self what is noticed? Is anything found? Is there really a David inside there, what if David is just a thought? "

My focus starts by looking at the body. I've identified with it for so long yet when I look closely no one's home... Next the mind??? I don't even know what the mind is any more. Probably just another thought. Maybe my identity can be found in my spirit?...Can it be that spirit is just a thought also...No, I think spirit is real but it's not mine to possess which means no "I" can be found there....Spirit = Life = experience....So far no "I" can be found outside of thought.David is just a label for this particular body at this particular time in space. A necessary label but that is all. That's actually pretty cool. No problem there!...One point of resistance is the thought that this search is fruitless. Who's the dude looking for the "I" that doesn't exist?????

" Yes,and where is the "I" that is saying it is attached to searching? Is there really one?"


It does "feel" that there is a searcher, but under the lights none is seen. In...out...left...right...up...down...still cann't find one. More looking is needed.


" and regarding the fear too...there is such a thing as a beginning and an end to this, is this true?"


Particular fearful thoughts seem to have a beginning and an end yet new fears seem to be ready to start when others end. Seen as a friend this may actually be helpful????


" and yes "I" thoughts surface and is there "anyone" doing that?"


No one is doing that. Just more thoughts...Could it be the man behind the curtains?


I've got to go for now but thanks again. You're awesome...Look forward to your response!

Namaste,
David

[dws777]

P.S.....could you please give me detailed instructions on how to use the quote function? I've played around with it but cann't figure it out....Thanks

[open space]

Hi David,

yes... "mind just another thought"...and who is doing thoughts, are "u" or are they just happening?...
look, notice do they just arrive on there own or is there "someone" doing them...
sit with thoughts as they arise today and be fascinated by them...are they happening to anyone or is anyone doing them?

yes...body "no one home"...can u see this apparent body has been being breathed, lived
all on it's own without "u"?


yes, spirit, is it real? can u touch it?...or yes is it a experience of David being lived?

One point of resistance is the thought that this search is fruitless. Who's the dude looking for the "I" that doesn't exist?????

great question, yes who is doing that!?...the person looking for the "I"...is there "someone" looking for an "I' or is that a thought too that arises to look and are "u" doing that thought?

It does "feel" that there is a searcher, but under the lights none is seen.
In...out...left...right...up...down...still cann't find one. More looking is needed.

"it feels that there is a searcher"...isn't that a thought?
look is there a searcher?...where do you find him...notice does he arise
in thought, yet is he real?

Particular fearful thoughts seem to have a beginning and an end yet new fears seem to be ready to start when others end. Seen as a friend this may actually be helpful????

yes, what is fear......can u touch it?...or does it arise as well and is there really "someone" there
that experiences fear or has fear or is that a thought too? look.

as for the quote use...hit the reply to this and then copy the line u want to post, then go up to the "Quote" prompt at the top right of this box and it will go into the new reply post. Did that work?

as for the "man behind the curtain"...let me know if you find him?:)
thanks for your commitment here, direct experience in looking here is key.....
let see what arises in this today...
loving,
Coll

[dws777]

Good Evening Colleen,

yes... "mind just another thought"...and who is doing thoughts, are "u" or are they just happening?...
look, notice do they just arrive on there own or is there "someone" doing them...
sit with thoughts as they arise today and be fascinated by them...are they happening to anyone or is anyone doing them?

No doer in thoughts. Just thoughts streaming through space interacting with other thoughts, absolutly incredible although annoying at times. The complexity of it all is mind blowing. Who's mind is it?.....lets just say "The Mind". They don't seem to be happening to anyone....just happening.

yes...body "no one home"...can u see this apparent body has been being breathed, lived
all on it's own without "u"?

"I" cann't see this apparent body being lived and breathed but this is what's happening. All bodily functions running on cruise control.

yes, spirit, is it real? can u touch it?...or yes is it a experience of David being lived?

Maybe spirit is real???...isn't experience real?...not the thought of the experience but the experience itself? Spirit = experience...Right?




yes... "mind just another thought"...and who is doing thoughts, are "u" or are they just happening?...
look, notice do they just arrive on there own or is there "someone" doing them...
sit with thoughts as they arise today and be fascinated by them...are they happening to anyone or is anyone doing them?

yes...body "no one home"...can u see this apparent body has been being breathed, lived
all on it's own without "u"?


yes, spirit, is it real? can u touch it?...or yes is it a experience of David being lived?

One point of resistance is the thought that this search is fruitless. Who's the dude looking for the "I" that doesn't exist?????

great question, yes who is doing that!?...the person looking for the "I"...is there "someone" looking for an "I' or is that a thought too that arises to look and are "u" doing that thought?

It does "feel" that there is a searcher, but under the lights none is seen.
In...out...left...right...up...down...still cann't find one. More looking is needed.

"it feels that there is a searcher"...isn't that a thought?
look is there a searcher?...where do you find him...notice does he arise
in thought, yet is he real?

Particular fearful thoughts seem to have a beginning and an end yet new fears seem to be ready to start when others end. Seen as a friend this may actually be helpful????

yes, what is fear......can u touch it?...or does it arise as well and is there really "someone" there
that experiences fear or has fear or is that a thought too? look.

as for the quote use...hit the reply to this and then copy the line u want to post, then go up to the "Quote" prompt at the top right of this box and it will go into the new reply post. Did that work?

as for the "man behind the curtain"...let me know if you find him?:)
thanks for your commitment here, direct experience in looking here is key.....
let see what arises in this today...
loving,
Coll[/quote]

[dws777]

Sorry Colleen,

While posting somehow the posts got blended together. Using the quote key seemed to be working until the 4th quote.Then the prior post blended with the current post. Not sure what to do?...

Waiting for advice,
David