The Gate

Hi Seeker123

I would be happy to do this inquiry with you. Before we start I wanna check in with you about two things:

1)

Please read the following documents from LU carefully and let me know if you have any questions, doubts or reserveations in regards to them:


http://liberationunleashed.com/disclaimer-2

And:

http://liberationunleashed.com/about/faq/#faq-1041

2)

I enjoy working with people who are highly motivated for this and want to do exercises/look at questions and stay in the corespondance more or less every day until we finish. This is not about making it rigidly so, exceptions (vacations, times where something else is called for, etc) are fine and in the end we will be guided by a flow beyond our decisions and imagination. So what I am checking in with here, is if this type of engagement feels right and is possible for you?

Hi, great! What may I call you?

Reading the sentence "there is no separate self, never was, never will be" what reactions come up?

Just attend to it and write what comes without censoring or controlling...

Hi, great! What may I call you?

Reading the sentence "there is no separate self, never was, never will be" what reactions come up?

Just attend to it and write what comes without censoring or controlling...

You can call me Jess.

Confusion.

Hi, great! What may I call you?

Reading the sentence "there is no separate self, never was, never will be" what reactions come up?

Just attend to it and write what comes without censoring or controlling...

You can call me Jess.

Confusion.

There’s like no reaction. Neutral. Detachment. The confusion seems to come from… what does it mean? I don’t hold any strong feeling to the statement itself. It’s just a lack of understanding. There’s an impulse to want to “do something about that” or “know something more.” A pull and desire to get to the next stage of understanding that?

You can call me Jess.

Confusion.

There’s like no reaction. Neutral. Detachment. The confusion seems to come from… what does it mean? I don’t hold any strong feeling to the statement itself. It’s just a lack of understanding. There’s an impulse to want to “do something about that” or “know something more.” A pull and desire to get to the next stage of understanding that?

Mind wants to create meaning of that. Without thoughts there’s no impulse to create meaning. A little bit of constricting in the chest. Doesn’t feel like there’s much there. It’s like the statement doesn’t matter. But the urge to know more is there? Like an impulse of let’s get to the understanding part. Hmmm…

There’s like no reaction. Neutral. Detachment. The confusion seems to come from… what does it mean? I don’t hold any strong feeling to the statement itself. It’s just a lack of understanding. There’s an impulse to want to “do something about that” or “know something more.” A pull and desire to get to the next stage of understanding that?

Mind wants to create meaning of that. Without thoughts there’s no impulse to create meaning. A little bit of constricting in the chest. Doesn’t feel like there’s much there. It’s like the statement doesn’t matter. But the urge to know more is there? Like an impulse of let’s get to the understanding part. Hmmm…

Doershop arises. Impulse to act arises. What’s the point? arises. Thoughts subside and sounds arise. Without a question of self to solve there’s just this. What’s happening. Breathing is happening. Sounds are happening. Typing is happening. Body moving is present

Mind wants to create meaning of that. Without thoughts there’s no impulse to create meaning. A little bit of constricting in the chest. Doesn’t feel like there’s much there. It’s like the statement doesn’t matter. But the urge to know more is there? Like an impulse of let’s get to the understanding part. Hmmm…

Doershop arises. Impulse to act arises. What’s the point? arises. Thoughts subside and sounds arise. Without a question of self to solve there’s just this. What’s happening. Breathing is happening. Sounds are happening. Typing is happening. Body moving is present

Desire arises. Desire to know. Desire to get this done and get this right. I see how silly that is and how it keeps me from presence. Like being isn’t enough. This isn’t enough to know this. There must be more…so, more thoughts.

Doershop arises. Impulse to act arises. What’s the point? arises. Thoughts subside and sounds arise. Without a question of self to solve there’s just this. What’s happening. Breathing is happening. Sounds are happening. Typing is happening. Body moving is present

Desire arises. Desire to know. Desire to get this done and get this right. I see how silly that is and how it keeps me from presence. Like being isn’t enough. This isn’t enough to know this. There must be more…so, more thoughts.

I am the noticer of the thinker of thoughts.

Hi Jess, we are off to a good start, it's great you report things as the come up, no matter how right/wrong good/bad insightful/not insightful it seems. This just seeing and sharing is at the core of this process.


Reading what came up, here are next two things two things to investigate:

1) The not having much reaction and then thoughts going to understand and get it right etc., seems indicate somewhat of a disconnect from the emotional, existential, direct felt level of this, and a defense/identification of living at the level of intellectualization and fantasy (the one who will understand, get it done, etc). So please sit more with the sensations and feelings that come from reading:

"There is no you, you don't exist, never did, your past and your future is an illusion"

Pay close attention to the sensation level and emotion level and describe what comes up. If again it seems like nothing, ask yourself what might I be unconsciously avoiding and again, just describe what comes up. Allow it to be loose and free what you share, be playful, open, explorative, almost as if you are discovering a character in a play.

2) This idea of "I am the observer of the one who believes in the self who feels the sensations who thinks the thoughts". What observer? What I? Can any of that be found in direct experience or might it just be beliefs?